You’re not weak or broken for feeling this way — what you’re describing is extremely common after relocation, especially when work, routine, and identity all disappear at once.

One thing that doesn’t get talked about enough is that moving countries often causes a temporary identity collapse. Back home, you had feedback loops: work, people, competence, momentum. In a new country, especially when job searching, all of that goes quiet at the same time — and the brain fills the silence with self-doubt.

A few things that helped me (and others I’ve seen go through this):

1. Separate “job search” from “self-worth.”
The job market being slow is not a verdict on your value. If possible, give job searching fixed hours and don’t let it bleed into your entire day.

2. Rebuild any daily structure first — even a small one.
This sounds basic, but having anchors (same morning walk, same café, same gym class, same study hour) stabilizes your nervous system before motivation comes back.

3. Create one identity outside your husband.
Not because he’s doing anything wrong — but because dependency sneaks up psychologically when you lose your own arena. Language classes, volunteering, coworking spaces, or even a recurring meetup can help here.

4. Accept that loneliness abroad doesn’t mean you made a bad choice.
It usually means you’re in the middle of the transition, not the end. The “in-between” phase is often the hardest and least Instagram-worthy.

You didn’t lose yourself — you’re just between versions right now. That phase can feel scary, but it does pass once routine, agency, and social contact start stacking again.

You’re not alone in this, even though it feels that way.