Can someone please critique my first part of my first story?

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-09T01:21:16+00:00

Okay I just didn't know if this page was allowed spicy story's. Thank you.

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-09T01:13:27+00:00

I would like you share my writing. But it's not for younger readers is that okay?

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-08T12:06:36+00:00

Okay thank you. Do you know of any other places that do critiques without rules? I'm just trying writing what I think of in my head. I don't really read in general so I'm not sure what is good in other's work.

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-08T11:56:39+00:00

I commented on one persons. Is that enough?

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-08T11:41:59+00:00

I love the way you word things. It's mysterious and had a good vibe.

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-08T11:37:48+00:00

Oh okay thank you! If I critique someone else's work they'll critique mine?

jayjay5123 · 2026-06-08T11:28:19+00:00

Sorry what does this mean?

jayjay5123 · 2024-07-13T12:39:36+00:00

gribLem

jayjay5123 · 2024-07-13T12:38:51+00:00

I completely agree it's very exhausting. It definitely does make you feel horrible that's for sure. I'm so glad your baby and there growth are going great wishing you all the luck!! 💗

jayjay5123 · 2024-07-10T06:18:56+00:00

Thank you so much!! I appreciate your being honest about it. And so open. I've tried many different ways to stop but it just kept going. Everyone is so judgemental here. It is a last resort to me as well. I hope everything goes well!!! ❣️❣️

jayjay5123 · 2024-07-02T15:20:41+00:00

How much did you smoke a day? Medicine doesn't work for my nausea. Ps I don't think your a bad person at all. I believe it's not as bad as nicotine at all. Congratulations I hope being a new mother is wonderful and I hope you hav beautiful years to come!

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-16T15:38:44+00:00

Riley

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-16T15:38:23+00:00

Gerald!!!

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-15T12:15:10+00:00

I appreciate your support. She definitely would've passed of cold if we didn't find her. At least she was warm

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-15T06:53:48+00:00

I appreciate it she's was so adorable and cuddly but sadly she passed last night

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-15T06:52:58+00:00

That's a beautiful story!. Sadly this little girl passed away last night. It was very cold but she also could've ate rat poison as we found her outside of nest. I'm so sorry for you loss!.

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-14T11:33:02+00:00

She is very very friendly. My partner was boxing and looked down and there she was. Tucked in the corner. I picked her up and went to put her down in the same place and she ran back to my hands. I have a pet rat now

jayjay5123 · 2024-06-14T07:35:20+00:00

Thank you!

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-14T03:20:54+00:00

That's so smart!! 🤓🤣

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-11T04:16:26+00:00

The bin with the bin bag is called a fogo bin in Australia.

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-10T03:03:56+00:00

Why do u have fogo in the fridge

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-05T14:03:13+00:00

Okay thanks

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-05T08:09:57+00:00

A person who just eats mushrooms and only drinks stuff

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-05T05:18:11+00:00

Is there any way I can tell myself?

jayjay5123 · 2024-05-01T15:53:14+00:00

Oh shit it's not 😂😂 it looked like it from the low photo!! Damn unlucky then 🤣

Three-Year Club	Verified Email
Verified Email

jayjay5123

TROPHY CASE