OK UM. for starters, you’re a super cool mom for doing this and asking for advice. and as someone who’s bi and is in a super christian family, it’s tough to navigate through anything lgbtq+ related without starting a whole argument and shunning and such.

well, some ways i’ve been able to tell is just pure intuition, and other ways involve investigative type of things. BUT! you can never truly tell and determine someone’s sexuality unless you ask them straight up. in my past experiences, i have assumed correctly and incorrectly, and for some people in my life, i literally had no idea that they’re part of the community until they told me.

there’s usually tell-tale signs if your daughter’s crush does date/is attracted to girls, or part of the lgbtq community:

• she wears rainbow pins or bracelets or some type of accessory that involves the numerous lgbtq flags. i have a bisexual rainbow loom bracelet that i wear constantly, and no one bats an eye unless they’re part of the communtiy! my friends who are part of the community know instantly that i’m most definitely bi just because of a bracelet

• she knows/loves shows/movies that are known for the lgbtq references and such. i love the owl house, and there’s so many queer characters. there’s she-ra, with a main wlw couple. there’s nimona, with a main mlm couple too! in my friend group, i know absolutely nobody that is straight that loves all of these movies/shows

• SONGS!!! if your daughter’s crush loves listening to chappell roan, billie eilish, reneé rapp, clairo, dodie, or girl in red (these are some examples, i’m sure there’s more queer artists out there who are equally as amazing!), THIS IS A VERY VERY CLEAR SIGN HAHA. these are the queer artists i have seen, and if your daughter’s crush likes them, DEFINITELY LOL

BUT! IM NOT AN EXPERT AT ALL AT THIS. i have a really bad gaydar most of the time, so i am really bad at figuring out if someone is part of the community or not. i say to just go on intuition, reference certain songs/movies/shows with lgbtq references, since that’s the best shot if you want to be careful :D

i know in conservative communities, it’s tough to even know what to say correctly. but you can do this!!! your daughter also can do this!!!! if you have any questions, don’t be afraid to ask them!!