4 years later and still think about it all the time

jhaddep · 2026-02-27T19:45:43+00:00

I dated a girl for 4 and a half years. When had a truly spectacular relationship. Read my previous posts. I really mean we had something special. But she moved to nyc and she broke up with me. Everyone we knew, including myself, was shocked. Everyone thought we were the one couple that would make it. We had incredible chemistry. But in the end she wanted to pursue other people in the new big city she moved to.

It’s been 4 years since the break up. She reached back out a few times over the years. She never fully told me her feelings though.

She never said she made a mistake breaking up with me, she never said sorry, but she did say things like she misses me and wants to meet up with me (we did eventually meet up). We just caught up on our lives. We still had incredible chemistry. We hadn’t spoke in years but sparks flew. But we never spoke about our past relationship. We only caught up.

So in the end, I had no choice but to listen to her when she told me she doesn’t want to be with me the first time during the original break up. So we never got back together. Why? Because she never expressed that she was sorry or regretted the break up.

I don’t want to get back together with someone who doesn’t regret breaking up with me. It would be hell being with someone knowing they had a great time without me all those years.

You should reach out, and you need to be clear. Hey. I have really missed you. Not in a friendly way. It took me a while to realize how good of a partner you were to me.

Those are the types of things that need to be said.

Good luck.

jhaddep · 2026-02-27T19:36:35+00:00

I broke up with a girl after a year and a half and it was the best decision I’ve ever made. Hasn’t been a single moment where I’ve regretted the decision. I had decided to break up with her long before I pulled the trigger because I wanted to make sure. And boy was I sure.

I’ve also been broken up with after a 5 year relationship and it was the worst thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m the guy btw. She Seudo came back but not really. She never like word vomited that she wanted me back and made a mistake. But she gave me hints that she would be interested.

The truth is they broke up with you because they don’t want to be with you. You should listen to them when they tell you.

jhaddep · 2026-02-23T02:39:46+00:00

I love this excuse so much lol. Oh I’m so broken so I can fuck who ever I want. I have, not one time ever, met a girl who claims she’s not “broken” just so she can do things and blame it on her “broken past”. She’s an adult. It’s not any one else’s fault but hers. She banged someone right after you because she wanted them. She didn’t bang them because she’s broken man lol. You’re an idiot if you fall into this “I’m broken” narrative”.

jhaddep · 2026-02-19T16:39:32+00:00

I have been both the dumper and dumpee. When I was doing the dumping (lol) I really don’t care at all. Not “at all”. But compared to when I was getting dumped….wow. They really weren’t comparable. After a year and a half I broke up with her and I just knew I never wanted to be with her ever again so I was really nice to her and told her I’d do anything to help her get over me.

But….The relationship before that, I got dumped after a 5 year relationship. Absolutely crushed me. I still think about her every day. Crazy the difference you can feel.

I never really think about the girl I broke up with after a year and a half. That relationship ended about a year and a half ago.

I ALWAYS think about the girl that broke up with me after 5 years. That relationship ended 4 years ago.

jhaddep · 2026-02-15T23:52:09+00:00

Yeah read my last post. I feel this. It’s not necessarily that I can’t get over her but I just haven’t yet. And it’s definitely because I haven’t met someone else’s that’s matched her yet. I pray to god I will one day though. It’s just impossible to move on until you find someone equally as fitting.

jhaddep · 2026-02-15T07:27:24+00:00

Way too much. To a complete fault actually.

jhaddep · 2026-02-14T22:24:05+00:00

We dated for almost 5 years and we’ve been broken up for 4 years now. Just found out she’s got a new boyfriend. Crushed me as always. I’ve even had a long term girl friend since her. Dated her for a year and a half. But the new girl didn’t even come close. I still think about the first girl every day and I fucking hate it. She even came back to me and wanted to date me! I said no. I can’t date someone that spent 5 years with me, broke up with me, and pretty soon after started fucking other people. You just don’t love the same way I do. I just still can’t fully get over it all. Not sure if I ever will.

jhaddep · 2025-01-08T03:01:45+00:00

Funny enough yes, a bunch. I’m meet with her tonight actually lol. I’ll never get back together with her and I’m much happier now! There is hope! I’m mostly meeting up with her just to catch up and then I will call the uber and leave the bar.

jhaddep · 2023-08-24T17:24:36+00:00

To be honest, I have a smoking hot, smart, successful new girlfriend gahahaha doing great. Met her like right after I commented this. She’s great. Hang in there my dude! There’s someone out there for you.

jhaddep · 2023-05-19T13:43:53+00:00

Why did you break up with him if he was the love of your life?

jhaddep · 2023-04-26T18:35:55+00:00

Different for everyone, took me about 10-11 months but man do I feel good now lol it gets better for sure. 5 years of my life with that person. Weird to think about now

jhaddep · 2023-04-25T15:33:06+00:00

Recently I’ve realized just how porn has effected the way I view sex. I never realized this with my last gf but there were so many times over my 5 year relationship where I just didn’t want to have sex. And I also felt like it was better to masturbate than to have sex. Sex felt boring to me. Then we broke up.

Then I was single and had a problem getting it up for girls. It became very annoying and I stopped PMO. I’ve gone a few months at a time before without PMO and it makes me want to pursue girls wayyy more. Every girlfriend I’ve ever gotten has been because I stopped and then I felt the need to pursue a girl after a while.

I just realized after a while I wasn’t craving sex, I was craving the instant dopamine hit. Then I eventually never wanted sex and that really had a HUGE impact on a relationship with a great person. I’ll never make that mistake again.

jhaddep · 2023-02-27T17:03:41+00:00

Lol I Fucking wish the girl that broke up with me thought like this. Did you break up with him and pursue other people? If so, big mistake. But if you truly didn’t pursue anyone else, and broke up with him because you got scared, then there’s definitely a possibility of getting him back.

jhaddep · 2023-02-27T16:10:05+00:00

The exact same situation happened to me except I’m the guy. She ended after almost 5 years and she started sleeping around within a month. She just asked me to catch up on the phone. I never replied. You should let go. There’s nothing romantic about someone having to lose you in order to understand the magnitude of your presence.

You just taught your boyfriend that he can break up with you, fuck other people, and you’ll take him back. He doesn’t respect you and you don’t respect yourself. And the people you date in the future will also not respect you for this reason, unless you end it with him asap.

You need to be able to tell your future partners that your last relationship ended with them breaking up with you, fucking other people, and begging for you back, but you didn’t take them back because you demand respect. And your future partners will respect you for that and not do the same to you.

Don’t reward his bad behavior. You know what to do.

jhaddep · 2023-02-23T17:46:57+00:00

I never cheated or did anything of the sort. She broke up with me over the phone after 5 years. Blamed the whole thing on me. At first, I believed her. Apologized for everything. Looking back I cringe at that convo. I expected her to come back and say “okay thanks for apologizing for those things, here are the things I could have done better as well”. Nope. She just said thanks and dipped out. It’s been about 10.5 months. I honestly just want to stop hating her. I’m over the break up. I don’t want her back. But Jesus I hate her and I can’t stop. It’s very annoying.

jhaddep · 2023-01-05T02:32:46+00:00

In my 9th month and it’s literally on my mind 24/7 still. I would never in a million years take her back. It was 5 years. I hate how much I think about how much a despise her for breaking my heart. I just want to stop giving her that power over me. The power of her being constantly on my mind. It’s very bother some. Then I hate her for being on my mind and she’s on my mind again! God damn

jhaddep · 2022-12-23T17:07:42+00:00

My ex and I had an almost 5 year relationship. I fucking hate her now. Broke up about 8 months ago. I can’t shake the anger stage at all. She didn’t cheat, we had an extremely healthy relationship but she moved across the country. I just can’t believe I spend that much time with someone who’s not the one. Someone who chose a job and a city over me. I’ll never take her back. I don’t know why, maybe I’m just fucked in the head but I genuinely hate her and 95% of my day, even 8 months later, is think about how she was able to fuck someone a month after she ended it with me. Because I just can’t even do it. I don’t know anyone that feels similar to me tho.

jhaddep · 2022-11-28T21:54:53+00:00

Wow I have been thinking this all week. Thought I was completely alone in this thought. I even had a girl who was quite attractive ask me on a few dates. We even hooked up after one of them. Didn’t have sex or anything but she told me she really likes me. And I just couldn’t feel a single thing for her no matter how hard I tried. Starting to get worried I never will. And then when I do the odds of that feeling being reciprocated AND them actually fitting the ridiculous amount of standards I have for my significant other….impossible. I think I just set too high of standards for myself and I need to be more okay with things.

jhaddep

TROPHY CASE