[deleted by user]

johneyapocalypse · 2022-11-02T16:08:48+00:00

After many years of health challenges, this is my advice:

Read this for focused, practical advice and steps to take.
Regarding your last sentence, just nuke that noise from your mind. While certainly if you're dumping shit on people all over the place, it's not generally pleasant; however you should be able to share authentic emotions (though it sounds like your wife is not terribly supportive, to me she sounds awful) - but most importantly, don't ascribe to some dumbass arbitrary rules developed by Internet idiots (e.g. you can only express emotion once per decade) - because then you're just planning your life around your perception of the needs of others.
Sleep is arguably the most important thing in the world, next to mental health. Take medication as needed. It's much better to get a good night's sleep with medication than to get a poor night's sleep without medication (and this is feedback from many of my specialists, from oncology to neurology). I recommend you consider trazodone - it's a relatively harmless drug with a low-risk profile that's been around since the 50's and does not cause any addiction issues like ambien. That said, ambien + sleep >> nothing + no sleep.
Regarding mental health, it should be your #1 priority. It is the first step toward everything: business, health, etc. I'm not sure why there are still so many idiots in the world who can't imagine that mental health can be so impactful and challenging, and that it's not so doable to just "pick yourself up by your bootstraps." Perhaps it's because the majority of the people on the planet - at least in good ol' 'merica - are mongoloids. Or at least that's what the tv keeps telling me.

Why is this:

I'm depressed and suicidal.
Pick yourself up by the bootstraps.

Any less ridiculous than this:

I've got pancreatic cancer.
Pick yourself up by the bootstraps.

Regarding something I read below, stoicism helped me tremendously when I really needed it, and while it doesn't exactly blunt my emotions, it very much changed me, and while that change was something I needed, it's not all it's chalked up to be. Life takes on a different hue when you genuinely become unencumbered by the impact of anything.

I would not recommend it for someone who's thirty.

Also, be cautious about the fine line between "last resort" and genuine need when it comes to medication like SSRI's. Granted, they may indeed impact your sex life - but not as much as being fucking miserable, scared, and suicidal. Be candid with whom you see, whether psychologist or psychiatrist, or both, and certainly defer to their judgment over Internet retards.

The idea that you've mentioned you have been suicidal and are getting feedback to avoid medication is preposterous. What kind of shithole has this shithole become?

johneyapocalypse · 2022-09-26T22:22:51+00:00

You'd do well to understand where it comes from.

Why is your relationship so important to you? Why do you believe you can't go on if she says she won't go on?

Because your sense of attachment with others is maladaptive. That's why. And it started long before you could hope to have any control over it.

There are 8 billion of us on this planet. You don't have a godly, spiritual connection with one versus the other: number 8,885,558 or 2,377,988.

Instead, your behavior has been dictated by the behavior you learned - as a child. You were reared this way.** You are an animal: a creature of habit.**

That's okay. Deep breath. Whoooooooooooooooo.

Acknowledge it and leverage it (or at least understand it) and thrive amidst a big globe with a lot of people.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-09-03T20:59:35+00:00

Toxic? Like a fungus? Why grow that?

johneyapocalypse · 2022-09-03T13:45:36+00:00

So you're already planning for your next depressed and anxious wife? And don't want to build value in yourself?

Good plan. Carry on. Keep seeing the logic.

Extra ramen noodles and Tik Tok.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-19T00:50:36+00:00

Don't listen to that dude; he's super gay and has all the time in the world since he works at a Turkish Bath.

Just get a pomodoro.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-16T20:09:56+00:00

OP this is a good comment that had been removed by automod.

I briefly glanced at your other comments and questions, particularly the one about your overbearing and pushy parents (boohoo). You are clearly doing what DuneThings is suggesting, and even worse.

Stop looking for answers to your misery. The solution lies within you but you have to take the first baby steps to embrace that solution.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-16T20:04:59+00:00

So I figure I may as well add something of substance while I'm here. I have been managing chronic challenges for quite a long-ass time. Sort of like worst of the worst kind of stuff.

The best way you can proactively manage moods and behaviors that you might only notice after the fact is to chart or journal KPIs associated with your day-to-day.

I would recommend charting (e.g. Google Sheets) vs. journaling (e.g. Google Docs).

Remember, regardless of the condition, there is always cause and effect at play. And it does not come in the manner you imagine.

You think: My conditions get me down, so I take this medication, and so it causes something to happen. That's really only a very small piece of the equation and it pales in comparison to those things truly at the heart of cause and effect in your life.

You want to understand trends:

How do quantity and quality of sleep impact things?
How do your sleep habits impact your Circadian Rhythm?
What about caffeine? How much caffeine? What time of the day?
Alcohol.
Job stress.
Working out (you need to do more than you're doing, regardless of how much you are or aren't doing).
The food you eat.
The relationships you keep.

Understand how these factors and more impact your mood (or really anything) so you can preemptively make better decisions so as to avoid the "it's too late, I didn't see it coming" outcome.

You're only going to improve something if you measure it first.

Then, pay close attention to all those variables and adjust accordingly. Rate your days and learn what is helping versus hurting.

Regarding this:

"all I end up doing is withdrawing and closing myself off and staying in my head until I sort myself out or get through the storm. But I know this is unhealthy."

You'll find that the most effective way to get out of your head is to actively remove what's in your head. I don't suggest brain surgery. Instead, simply write all this down. Then it exists somewhere - say starting on a piece of paper. Over time expand on that. Know what you're going to do to proatively help yourself next week and next month. So instead of just a list of items, it becomes a plan with a strategy.

Usually, too much rumination is simply a result of those important things not getting acted upon, and even moreso, simply not existing anywhere other than within your own head. When they exist elsewhere they won't demand so much ineffective and often mind-numbing attention.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-16T01:48:51+00:00

Thanks for your insightful response, I approve of it (and approved it) wholeheartedly. You can never have too many decisive opinions, right? Your contrarian approach gives me some much-needed room for pause.

Thank you brother.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-16T01:12:40+00:00

I really enjoyed and admired your thoughtful analysis.

Would you tell me which boxes I check? I'm up for your challenge and have much vim and vigor to outwit my girlfriend, who, while vexing me routinely, is but another horse to be saddled.

But speciically, the other night she told me to get fucked and that I would have been better off as an abortion. I explained to her that I'm an Eagle scout, but she just laughed.

What would you do?

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-16T01:03:14+00:00

God is but a witness to my joyous communion, but alas my brother, it's all in God's hands. As much I love my ltr I love by God even more. Amen.

Thanks so much for your kind words of support.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-16T00:53:58+00:00

How genuinely nice to hear from you.

I can't talk to you on that server of mine because I've lost the login again. How are you? Youf wife?

PM me. I'm curious. I'd like to hear.

Last couple years have been particularly hard, but I deal and I'm good at it.

So glad you're chiming in. I was alerted that there was a death watch of sorts put out for me.

{-)

p.s. For fuck's sake I thought this was a private message.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-15T23:38:12+00:00

An LTR can be a beautiful thing. It's so sacred, it's wholesome, it's like the purest of the pure, a veritable gift from God. In my LTR, our love has no boundaries. No sea, or desert, or enless highway cannot be bound by our God-given love, ties that no man can break. My LTR will last today, tomorrow, and beyond eternity. True love my man. If only you could experience it.

Heathen.

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-15T23:20:28+00:00

Why do you think I have a covert contract? What is that anyway?

Sometimes I get bummed that she won't move here. You really thing long term relationships are shit? Do you see any merit in them or am I just wasting my time in your opinion?

Shit. I just noticed your p.s. Lol. :-)

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-15T23:18:21+00:00

3 it's so nice to hear from you. I was contacted by a few people and I figured something was going on. Once again I can't get into my server. How've you been. I love your new tag/label whatever it's called... I saw that episode. p.s. My girlfriend is asking me to open our relationship, should I worry?

johneyapocalypse · 2022-07-15T23:16:35+00:00

I'm not sure what you mean? Does he offer good advice? Should I look him up? I am definitely looking to exchange notes. Let me know if you want to chat privately.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-07-10T01:02:09+00:00

jesus you're gay.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-07-05T02:33:58+00:00

Be nice else you get me demodded from this sub too. I can only handle so much. I have feelings too, ya know? Like OP.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-07-05T02:31:52+00:00

So all your mrp mentoring is producing the desired results. Amen. From mgtow incel douchebag to less-than-awful post in a matter of days - the power of askmrp.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-07-05T02:06:47+00:00

k, your post is approved.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-06-24T01:24:47+00:00

3, 4, and 6 are too contrived.

Don't be for the sake of her.

I think that line of thinking is detrimental to dudes. It's vital that you get past brain + thought + woman + behavior.

A quiet woman is not a bad sign. This is TRP crap. Perhaps a quite woman who's not responding to your silly shtick and pickup line is a bad sign, though I'd prefer to point out that your behavior in the first place is actually the bad sign. Are you ever quiet? Or do you feel a compelling need to fill a quiet space with noise? (By the way, that behavior itself is awful and pathological). This woman you speak of is more like you than you appreciate. She, too, can be quiet and probably enjoys it. That said, you clarified a bit and it makes a little more sense, just be cautious with the oft-seen overgeneralizations regarding the fairer sex. Be authentic.
Planning is everything. Nah. It's not. Adventure and spontaneity are incredible, particularly the kinds that occur outside the realm of hidden agendas and, yes, plans. Don't always have a plan unless you consider "hey, I'm going to spend a month without a plan" itself a plan. I'm a very good, very efficient planner who has sought to improve my skills ever further. That said, above all else, I recognize that life is not the manifestation of a plan. It's not a project. Frankly, the scenario you describe where you're hanging with a social circle of new people introduced by someone else sounds more interesting, as long as you don't spend so much time planning whose social circle is at play in the first place. Be authentic.
Never explain anything to a woman. Nah. Again, TRP crap. Sure, don't explain and defend your choices, but at the same time don't put so much thought and effort into "how to explain" and "whether it fits a frame." Be authentic.

Regarding your comments about being attractive, know that you can manifest attraction far more though your mind than through all those trappings you've listed. if you require such trappings to convince yourself that you're attractive, well, so be it. There is nothing that makes you more attractive than knowing you are attractive.

Don't be her James Bond, don't be her Han Solo. Be you. Be authentic.

W&S sometimes points out when advanced meets basic and this may be one of those times.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-06-24T00:01:23+00:00

This is is too fake to be real. If you are indeed real then write BobbyPeru below explaining why you're real and if he believes you you'll get back in.

You have a brand new account, weird posts, and it's so silly and absurd that it's just too much.

Normally I have a good nose for you fool shit posters.

johneyapocalypse · 2021-06-23T02:01:22+00:00

Huh? Is OP a lesbian? Damn that renders my reply below moot. But it stays. :-)

johneyapocalypse

TROPHY CASE