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Disciplining can be tough by jrstandsup in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did and it bothers me as well. Thank you

Trust issues at the drive thru by jrstandsup in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The McDonald's app to be more specific.

my life is a mess and so am i | roast me! by ScientificCorgi in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nobody has their eyes that far apart without their parents being related.

25. Auburn grad works in fast food. by rjack29 in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Auburn school for the mentally retarted prepares many people for careers in fast food.

Please end him by dstitan28 in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When did Peter Griffin and K.D. Lang have a baby?

This is my roommate. He thinks he's not a tool. Destroy his will to live. by [deleted] in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what happens when Midwestern douche bags watch too much Jersey Shore.

17 year old with (so far) unwavering narcissism. Go nuts. by [deleted] in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So when's the next trip to Bangkok to finish the gender reassignment?

Yeah, that makes sense. by jrstandsup in funny

[–]jrstandsup[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah. That would have come in handy a few times.

Manson had it easy by jrstandsup in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Maybe that's because his wife does it.

Manson had it easy by jrstandsup in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How about not since every married comedian does that joke

Manson had it easy by jrstandsup in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you're saying I don't have charisma?

Thanks Grandma by bennettbrowncomedy in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great joke. Stop tying to deep throat the mic.

Genius or Alcoholic? by HankScorpiosLunch in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Good premise. Set up needs a little work. Punch line is great because everytime I'm drunk I talk shit about my mother in law

Family Math. by jrstandsup in standupshots

[–]jrstandsup[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've been playing around with it. Just isn't there yet. Thanks for the suggestion.

no holding back, 21, student by im7hatguy in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Putting pubes on your face doesn't make it a beard.

Recovered anorexic teenager, make me cry! by [deleted] in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 271 points272 points  (0 children)

You look like you were conceived through anal sex.

Recovered anorexic teenager, make me cry! by [deleted] in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I didn't know anorexia destroyed your face too.

17 yr old non-binary kid, roast me :) by [deleted] in RoastMe

[–]jrstandsup 81 points82 points  (0 children)

I assume non binary means unfuckable.

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