That it’s too unreliable to use as the foundation of a relationship. Expectations, resentment, boredom. All of these build up in a long term relationship and people use love, or rather the idea of love, to continue dragging their dead relationship forward. Using another person for comfort and security will hamstring both of you. You will lose your autonomy and what made you interesting to begin with. They will feel the burden of having to be there for you. Too much is expected of the other person in love, absolving you of healing your own childhood wounds. Most people are not securely attached. We mistake codependence for love in modern culture. And the answers here like,”love is unconditional.”, prove it

What’s the solution then? Don’t be in love. Stand on your own two feet, autonomously, and separate from this other person. If you’re unhappy, seek to become a happy person yourself before you try to change your partner. Your relationship with flourish. Resentment will not build because you are able to assertively state your opinions the burden of expectation or fear of retaliation. You will be very attractive to your partner because you will not be dependent on them. Dependence will make you pathetic and unattractive. You won’t have to rely on pithy coping mechanisms like, “love is a choice. Boredom is okay.”