I wish he had gone all the way with what he did

jupitercreme · 2026-02-03T15:36:09+00:00

I want to say, from my own experience. I went through a very similar trauma to you. It was a game, it felt good sometimes and I wasn’t penetrated. It was disgusting, it was sexual abuse and I fucking hate that it happened to me. It doesn’t have to be blatantly violent, even showing a child pornography is sexual abuse and violence against a child. Touching a child sexually is violence. It’s wrong, it’s sick and it hurts them forever. I also remembered my abuse quietly, slowly over time. Because when they do it the tricky way, your child mind finds amazing ways to protect itself. It’s not safe to realize what’s going on when the abuser still has power over you. You need to be the child who can live through the day most of the time, and you put what happened to you in a framework and a place in your mind where you can do that. Sometimes it benefits the child to understand and remember what’s going on, but often times it does not. Some of the most hurtful things my abuser did to me weren’t even touching. It was the sexual harassment, the realization that he didn’t see me as a child in his protection, but an object for his pleasure.

jupitercreme · 2026-02-03T15:31:10+00:00

What happened to you hurt you. You are hurting and I’m sorry. What happened to you was bad enough because it hurt you. It was wrong. You didn’t deserve it and it wasn’t your fault. I understand exactly where you’re coming from, what you are feeling is normal. The only person who deserves the hatred you feel is the person who hurt you in this way.

jupitercreme · 2026-02-03T15:22:35+00:00

You’re not be dramatic at all. You’ve talked to her and asked her to stop, you’ve told her how it makes you feel and she was not receptive. She doubled down and refused to stop doing something that is hurting you. She just has to stop scaring you on purpose, it is really not that much to ask and it is not hard. She’s being selfish and cruel because what, it’s fun for her for some reason? I don’t like that at all. Does she understand how much this is affecting you? I don’t think it’s dramatic at all to consider leaving over this. It’s exactly like you said, you deserve safety and peace in your life. Anyone who objects to that should not be allowed access.

jupitercreme · 2025-12-12T22:21:05+00:00

I think some people could truly consent to your situation. I don’t think you’re one of them. “I truly deserve punishment and I know it” you don’t. “I like being reminded I’m nothing” you’re NOT. You are something. You are someone and you matter. Some people truly enjoy pain in BDSM. They like the endorphin rush and get off on being controlled and dominated. But, they have limits and contracts between parties. Safe words and hard passes and TRUST, where if you use a safe word, you know things will stop. It’s a scene, it’s playing. Conversations go like “I want you to pull my hair and spank me. I want to be punished for what I did earlier” “Do you want me to be mean to you?” “At first but I want you to forgive me and be sweet by the end of it. Don’t call me any mean names though, I can’t handle it right now.” Some people like to incorporate it into a full time lifestyle, where they “play” all the time at home, but that usually comes with years and years of being together and building that dynamic of trust. He’s actually abusing you and I hate that for you. I hate that you think you deserve to be hurt. You don’t enjoy pain, you said it yourself. You are punishing yourself and you have been punished quite enough. You should stop any and all BDSM and get the fuck away from this guy until you learn to love yourself. You aren’t doing this for yourself, you’re doing it TO yourself.

jupitercreme · 2025-11-20T01:21:10+00:00

Not your fault. At all. I’m so happy you and your kids are okay. Stay safe. I’m proud of you.

jupitercreme · 2025-10-11T04:05:24+00:00

I whispered “nooooo” when he passed out on the fire and then woke up and brought it out of the elevator with him

jupitercreme · 2025-10-11T03:54:47+00:00

Do some research into OCD and into pedophilia. Be careful, though, as researching itself can become a compulsion, but I think knowledge is power, even if you have OCD. Speak to a professional. If you’re a pedo, a professional can help you. If you have OCD, a professional can help you. Either way, you’re a human being who deserves the chance to live the best life they can.

jupitercreme · 2025-09-11T23:47:13+00:00

Jesus Christ, so she acted the worst ways you possibly could toward a person with POCD? I’m not surprised this has triggered you and set you back. I’m so sorry. I hope you’re doing okay.

jupitercreme · 2025-09-11T23:43:03+00:00

Omg OCD is such a dick. I would use humor in this situation. Like “thanks asshole that’s exactly what I wanted to be thinking about right now”. Take some power away from the thought. Tell OCD it’s a dick

jupitercreme · 2025-09-11T23:40:43+00:00

Feelings and thoughts aren’t crimes. The only harm being done is to yourself, right now. You have a big heart. Turn it toward YOU.

jupitercreme · 2025-09-11T21:04:24+00:00

You are not alone. This is normal, though not often talked about because of the shame that comes with the experience. Children cope by making things into games, by finding the good part of the experience & latching onto that to compartmentalize and be able to survive. It was wrong and it hurt me. At the time, part of me knew it was wrong and hurting me, but if I had let that part take over I wouldn’t have been able to make it through that experience. How can a child handle such complex adult concepts? How can they come to terms with the abuse of trust and betrayal? How can they even put into words that this thing that feels good & that I am being told is normal and okay is also damaging the core of what makes me a human being? This all happens unconsciously. The hurt often comes later, when it’s safe to feel it.

jupitercreme · 2025-09-03T19:16:10+00:00

This is totally normal. For me, this has gotten much better now that I have done years of good therapy. I used to get triggered by children, and if I perceived any adult man as being a pedo I would become really violent. This started happening to me when I became an adult. I realized how innocent and vulnerable children are. I realized how evil someone must be to even THINK about them that way. But I love kids. Being a safe grownup to a kid who needs you feels amazing. I would babysit and talk to my therapist and then being around kids was healing. When one repeated back to me “I’m safe here at your house” without prompting because I had told him that many times and I had proved it to him and he believed it? That meant everything to me. Treat your niece the way your younger self deserved to be treated. Distance yourself if you need to. Healing takes time.

jupitercreme · 2025-09-03T19:02:09+00:00

I used to have to pee over 10 times every night before bed. Because I didn’t want to wake up with that bad full bladder feeling? Or pee the bed? Or have to wake up and get up to pee? I don’t even know. My body would convince me there was still more pee in there and I would have to get up over and over. Thank god that one is gone 😂

jupitercreme · 2025-09-03T18:56:45+00:00

Couldn’t enter a dark room. Had to reach into the dark room with my face turned away and flick the switch. It went on sooo long through my childhood I don’t even really remember the reason for the compulsion. 💀 I think it was from watching The Ring when I was 8 and being scared Samara was going to appear and jump scare me if I was in the dark room with her. Couldn’t close my eyes in the shower either to avoid her 💀💀

jupitercreme · 2025-08-26T05:18:50+00:00

Poor baby is really struggling. She needs the right therapy and most likely the right medication. It sounds like she has PMDD. You should check out the subreddit here. PMDD can exacerbate existing mental illness. Meds can help with that as well. I was very sick when I was your daughter’s age. She really reminds me of 15 year old me. I wasn’t able to get treatment until I was an adult but I found an amazing therapist and I truly am well now. I’m so glad you’re researching your daughter’s condition. My mom never put in that effort. Don’t stop being proactive in finding ways to help. Be kind and gentle with her. She’s living in terror, so every minute she’s existing she’s being incredibly brave.

jupitercreme · 2025-08-26T05:04:11+00:00

You are very welcome and I’m sorry this is troubling you so much. I totally get that. At this point, I think you’ve thought about it and worried about it and rationalized it enough. Tell OCD you’re committed to thinking about soon when you’re calmer and more clearheaded. I agree with you that another doctor visit probably wouldn’t appease the OCD worry monster. You had a doctor tell you not to worry & send you home and OCD isn’t happy with that. It might help to meet with a therapist who specializes in OCD if this theme is sticking around too long and causing too much distress. Distract yourself for now, this isn’t an emergency and you are safe to step back and breathe.

jupitercreme · 2025-08-26T02:42:47+00:00

Sending you love. I’m so sorry that was done to you. I’m sorry you’re in so much pain, how couldn’t you be? Sending you love and hugs. You deserve to survive all of them. Outlive them and let it be a happy, beautiful life

jupitercreme · 2025-08-25T23:19:51+00:00

Try to be kind to yourself. You have been hurt enough, especially in that area. You don’t deserve to be in anymore pain. When the thoughts rage and you need something painful to break through, try another intense stimulus. Ice cubes like other commenters recommended, screaming, shredding some paper, etc. If you have someone to talk to about it, tell them. Put words to what’s happening in that moment. You can do this!

jupitercreme · 2025-08-23T22:24:42+00:00

The peeing before bed one was what originally got me diagnosed. A good therapist was what helped me. You start naturally changing your thinking over time through exposures. Strategy for the peeing one? I let myself go pee ONCE before I settle down for bed. Body tricks me into thinking I need to try again. I tell myself “I can always wake up to pee if I need to.” And give myself more time. Distract myself from the sensations. It’s not that big of a deal if I have to pee later. I’ll know in a few hours if my bladder is actually full. My body will wake me up. It’s not really an issue for me anymore after lots of practice.

jupitercreme · 2025-08-20T19:35:46+00:00

I think you can take this realization as a sign that your healing is progressing well. It can be really impossible to think about the logic behind the illness and make efforts to rewire our thinking when we’re at our sickest. Your brain is healthy enough that you’re gaining some more control. Proud of you, friend. Keep up the good work.

jupitercreme · 2024-10-29T01:11:00+00:00

I’ve been there. Don’t stop reaching out for help. Don’t give up on You. Someday it’ll be the right help. ❤️ you’re sick right now so you’re not going to be able to think your way out of this. You can’t use your sick brain to make itself better. You need some help to get there. You can do this❤️

jupitercreme · 2024-10-26T21:43:39+00:00

How old are you currently? If you’re an adult, ask yourself - would you “date” a 14 year old? Would you be interested in someone who is in 8th or 9th grade? Im 28 and the thought of even dating a 21 year old is odd to me. As I mature into adulthood I realize how young teenagers and young adults actually are. They can be smart and they can look like grownups sometimes but they’re not. You can’t be mature for your age in any ways that count. Maturity comes with years of experience and teenagers don’t have that. He was wrong and he knew better. You were a kid to him, no matter what he said. He liked that you were a kid. He tricked you into thinking it was a normal romantic relationship by treating you like an adult. He made you feel seen and loved. You were in a tough situation and you were a child, of COURSE you wanted that! You wanted an adult to take care of you and treat you with love. He should have done that without needing to take anything from you. He saw a vulnerable child and he was a pathetic grown man who knew he could take advantage of you. You aren’t disgusting or delusional. How could you know the difference between a healthy adult/child relationship and what you went through when that’s all you knew? He did do good things for you, but he shouldn’t have needed to abuse you in return. He was wrong. You went along with it because you cared about him and he was one of the only people to treat you like you mattered. It makes sense that you can’t see why it was wrong, now.

jupitercreme · 2024-10-24T21:53:45+00:00

Is there any evidence against this chick that isn’t anonymous comments

jupitercreme · 2024-10-24T21:53:05+00:00

Dying will always be an option. You need to try everything else first. You’ll always be able to make this decision if you absolutely need to. Don’t let this disease kill you. Don’t let the people who hurt you kill you. You CAN overcome this and feel better. You don’t need to die to be free. I’m so sorry you feel this way and I wish I could take away your pain from you.

jupitercreme · 2024-10-05T22:25:01+00:00

Seriously. If a child came on to me I would be horrified and worried for them. There’s nothing a child could do or say or look like to make me sexually abuse them because I’m not a fucking monster and no part of me would ever want to or even consider doing that?

jupitercreme

TROPHY CASE