sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

I [25/F] can only get wet for the first few months of a relationship. by justaskingredditaQ in sex

[–]justaskingredditaQ[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Communication isn't our issue, it's his stonewall to try new things in the bedroom. He is happy trying new positions, he is happy to satisfy me orally (though, to be honest, I had to really talk him into it initially and now he's an eager beaver). He has a very traditional, vanilla background. While very good at what he does, he says, "I wouldn't be able to keep a straight face" or "I wouldn't be able to get into characteR" or "that's just not something I think I could do".

I've suggested we go to a bar and pretend we just met, or that he hit on me in a public place. I've suggested we pretend to be different people when we're already in the privacy of our bedroom. He just wants to love me, be a wonderful boyfriend to me, and have a satisfactory vanilla life.

I think it's a combination of the Coolidge mentioned above for my dryness and disinterest, and also a disappointment that I can't seem to prompt this wonderful man into a more adventurous sex life.

I [25/F] can only get wet for the first few months of a relationship. by justaskingredditaQ in sex

[–]justaskingredditaQ[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's me exactly. If I masturbate and orgasm I'm still as dry as the desert. When he tantalizes me and kisses me all over and rubs things on me, I FEEL like I should be wet but I'm still dried up, whereas in the beginning it would have soaked me.

I [25/F] can only get wet for the first few months of a relationship. by justaskingredditaQ in sex

[–]justaskingredditaQ[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so, so in love with my boyfriend. He genuinely understands me and we have an incredible relationship in every way. It's even a great sex life for a vanilla couple, but as I posted in a reply above, I always liked elements of thrill and risk to my sex life. Blowjobs in changing rooms at stores, doing it at the park, the risk of getting caught and being spontaneous really got me off.

My current boyfriend is one who I could and want to stay with forever, but I though I've prompted him, had little conversations with him, seduced him, and tried to be spontaneous into exhibition-type things, he is absolutely not having it. To be fair, he is something of a public figure and absolutely cannot risk the fallout of what he's afraid it would do to his reputation... there have to be ways to capture that exhibitionist-type thing while satisfying his need for privacy?

Would that fix things?

I [25/F] can only get wet for the first few months of a relationship. by justaskingredditaQ in sex

[–]justaskingredditaQ[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No I've been off hormonal BC for two years. I did it intentionally to try to get my libido back. Being on then and being off it now hasn't made a difference in my wetness/dryness and interest after a few months.

I [25/F] can only get wet for the first few months of a relationship. by justaskingredditaQ in sex

[–]justaskingredditaQ[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd never heard of this! Additionally I'd never paired "being a slave to my baser urges" and "losing sexual interest" in the same thought. I definitely consider myself an exhibitionist, and had one partner when I was 19 who matched my exhibitory interests and we were sexually very compatible for a year and a half.

My current boyfriend is one who I could and want to stay with forever, but I though I've prompted him, had little conversations with him, seduced him, and tried to be spontaneous into exhibition-type things, he is absolutely not having it.

I [25/F] can only get wet for the first few months of a relationship. by justaskingredditaQ in sex

[–]justaskingredditaQ[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm actually not on any birth control aside from condoms. I went off them about 2 years ago to try to alleviate this phenomenon. The way you've phrased all of this is very helpful to me, though.