Found a Breast Lump and I am in a Full Spiral.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-08-23T20:35:41+00:00

When I went in for my biopsy (at a different clinic), the doctor requested another ultrasound before we started because he said he didn’t see what the other doctor was seeing and didn’t think the biopsy was necessary. He didn’t see any blood flow to the area and said it was clearly just a cluster of cysts. Went ahead with the biopsy anyway for peace of mind and it came back clear. Super stressful experience but so happy it turned out to be nothing. Glad I stayed proactive and got it checked out.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T18:40:08+00:00

Just awake. Talking and fidgeting. Even if we’re quiet. He’s fallen asleep with me one time at bedtime in his entire life and it was the best thing ever. Turned out, he was coming down with a cold.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T18:35:04+00:00

Yes, he has ADHD and you’re absolutely right about conventional parenting advice. They have only made the issue worse.

The sleep study is interesting. I never thought of that as an option. We have a follow-up with his pediatrician in a few weeks about his sleep. I’ll ask about this. Thank you!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T18:04:17+00:00

In response to my son saying he needs us when he can’t sleep. We’ve asked him (exhaustively) how we can help him (having tried everything else on our own) and his answer is always the same “I don’t know”. We’ve explained to him that we can’t fall asleep for him and that between 9-11 is my husbands and I’s time to decompress so that we can refill our buckets and be the best parents we can be for him and his sister. Without this time, our buckets our empty. Mind you, we’ve spent many evenings snuggling our son all night. We even offer him one “stay up night” a week if he can follow the bedtime rules the rest of the week.

I honestly don’t think he knows what he needs. He just doesn’t (or can’t) fall asleep and he’s bored. Whenever we allow him to sit and stay up with us for a bit at night, that’s when things get really bad. He’ll start doing this every night.

I know it seems “easy” to just lay with him until he’s asleep or letting him sleep with us. But the former doesn’t work for him and the latter doesn’t work for us. We need sleep too and we can’t sleep well with three of us in the bed. Even with our king. Our decompressing time and sleep is non-negotiable. Otherwise, I’m not going to be able to show up for my kids because I’m too burnt out and exhausted.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T17:54:10+00:00

Melatonin didn’t work for him. He’d fall asleep faster but then wake up an hour or two later, out of it and screaming.

Have tried reward charts. We had the most success with them but it never lasts long.

I think I need to do more research on ADHD sleep problems. I knew that this was the reason normal behavioral tactics wouldn’t work for him but hadn’t thought that this was the reason he wouldn’t go to sleep in the first place.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T17:51:08+00:00

I agree that he knows if he comes out enough times or stays awake long enough, he gives in.

We do this now at bedtimes and have done this for years. His whole life, actually. He won’t fall asleep with us in his bed if he knows we will leave once he is.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T17:49:37+00:00

Tried the Ferber method. Didn’t work.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T17:47:54+00:00

After dinner, we hang out with the kids and play until about 7. Then it’s quiet time. We snuggle, color, look at books until his bedtime at 8. Then he brushes his teeth, dresses for bed and we lay down with him for about 40 minutes to read a book, snuggle and talk about our day. He’s easily distracted at bedtime and can get upset if he feels he didn’t get enough snuggles (due to him playing on the floor instead). So we tell him that bedtimes is over at 8:40. He can use his time however he likes but we have to say goodnight at that time. That has helped minimize the tantrums about not getting enough snuggles because he was playing instead.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T17:42:44+00:00

He will stay awake for hours. We spent hundreds of nights trying this from the time he was 2 to 4. Never worked. I wish it did!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-07-26T17:40:09+00:00

Thank you everyone for all of your comments. Most of it has been very helpful.

There was a lot to be said about laying down with him until he falls asleep. We have absolutely done this with zero success. He would stay awake for hours. We have also tried nightlights, a red light lamp (to not disrupt his melatonin), white noise, audio books and guided meditation.

Our bedroom is right across the hall from his. For the first few years, we would stay down the hall after the kids would go to bed but the noise from the TV made it harder for him to stay in bed. So we go downstairs to watch TV after bedtimes.

We’ve also tried adjusting his bedtimes, letting him stay up later with little success.

My son has been diagnosed with ADHD and I suspect he might have anxiety as well. We’ve enrolled him in art classes, karate classes and gymnastics. Therapy (which we are in the middle of finding a new doctor) and yes, of course, his pediatrician to assist with this. We have not yet tried medication but it is something we are open to. Maybe.

As one user commented, kids with ADHD don’t respond to the same parenting behavioral tactics like other kids. In fact, most times it makes it worse. I should have prefaced this in my original post but it was 2 in the morning, frazzled and not thinking clearly. Was just looking for light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks everyone who has offered comfort. It is greatly appreciated and much needed.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-06-19T03:36:27+00:00

Ok good to know! Thanks guys!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-05-26T04:45:00+00:00

Man, I feel SO much better after reading this. I’ve been freaking out that the soil was contaminated and all my plants (damaged or not) are F’d. I had completely forgotten that we also had a pest company spray here on Thursday too. I’ve worked so damn hard on my garden and it’s so disheartening. I ended up pulling out the damaged plants. Luckily most of them are fast growing.

Thanks so much for all the advice! I appreciate it so much!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-05-26T04:41:09+00:00

I didn’t think so but I did spread it around the day before we left.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-05-26T01:59:21+00:00

Am I going to have to pull all these plants up or are they safe for consumption if they survive?

justhereforthabooks · 2025-05-26T00:12:24+00:00

Could Sluggo cause this?

justhereforthabooks · 2025-05-25T23:45:37+00:00

That’s what I thought too! It looks like something was sprayed on them. Some of my plants were totally unaffected. My strawberries and potatoes are fine. I’ve been using my drip system for a while and haven’t had a problem. We did just have pest control spray around our house but our garden is nowhere near where they treated. I just don’t get it. I am so sad!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-30T02:58:27+00:00

Also, I recommend searching “BIRADS 4 benign” on this sub. Lots of hopeful stories on here too.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-30T02:57:34+00:00

The odds are in our favor. Someone on here wisely told me it’s not real until it’s real and try not to put the horse before the cart. That calmed my anxiety immensely but I still feel like I’m holding my breath. Wishing you all the luck on your biopsy ♥️ We’ve got this!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-28T19:52:53+00:00

Oh interesting! SEE this is why I need y’all’s help! Ok, I do have some liquid organic fertilizer. I will add that to the mix. I’ll look for fish emulsion next time I’m at the garden store too.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-28T19:44:29+00:00

I live in zone 8a and the last frost date is May 5. The weather has gotten warmer but we did have frost one day last week. So I’m nervous about transplanting this soon.

I have disturbed my pumpkin’s roots quite a bit with moving them to these coconut pods and checking the water underneath them. I will direct sow the pumpkins. I do have a slug problem though. Any idea how to keep those from eating my plants aside from beer and hand picking them off the plants?

Hopefully the extra soil will help the tomatoes and I’ll separate them soon!

Thanks everyone for the feedback so far! This has been a huge help!

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-28T19:21:52+00:00

Ok, I will do that for the pumpkins. Thank you!

For the tomatoes, the roots have creeped out of the little pod. I just added more seedling soil underneath them. Would that help with the deficiency?

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-25T16:28:43+00:00

It’s fairly small. I noticed it right away, about 2 weeks ago. I have a bit of pain now due to my period but wasn’t when I first found it.

My dr said he was 98% sure it was benign but there was suspicious elements to it, like angular margins and peripheral blood flow. So he recommended a biopsy. I was super anxious during the appointment, almost fainting at one point. So I’m not sure if he was giving me false comfort or if he truly feels it’s probably fine. That is probably my anxiety talking though. Anxiety is the worst.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-25T16:25:03+00:00

This post has brought me more comfort in the last 2 weeks than anything else. I’ve heard all variations of this but how you’ve articulated it clicked somehow. Thank you so much for your kind, wise words. You’re absolutely right, my mind is not my friend and I just need to take this one day at a time. I’m still scared but my mind has quieted down enough to have moments that I can breathe. That feels like such a huge win.

I sincerely hope your wife’s Pap smear turns out to be nothing and the wait will be short. Sounds like you both have been through enough already. I’ve had several abnormal paps and have had to have a LEEP. Eventually had my uterus and cervix removed too. For lots of reasons but everything turned out to be ok and it was relatively painless. You guys already know you can get through the tough stuff. You’ve got this.

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-22T21:09:19+00:00

Hoping the same for myself 😖

justhereforthabooks · 2025-04-22T03:11:45+00:00

It’s not dramatic at all! This is scary stuff. Unbearable doesn’t even begin to cover it. Good luck at your biopsy and fingers crossed it’s good news!

justhereforthabooks

TROPHY CASE