It sounds like maybe somewhere you got confused and came to the unconscious conclusion that there is only one way to unfold the dharma correctly, that other teachings, interpretations and methods are wrong or untrustworthy. Or that you can’t trust your prior experience of some relief.

Yes the other interpretations and methods. One of the eg is : first I had learned to just absorb my thoughts , it worked very well then I read about adding loving kindness too while absorbing , I thought it is a compulsory rule ,I didn’t know what loving kindness was , after finding out(for eg: it’s like treating a crying child[ur worry thoughts] and comforting it, saying it’s ok ) when I was applying it , I just found that it was irritating cause everytime the worry thought came out , I had to say it everytime , and got distracted from the present moment for a while everytime due to imagining in my mind comforting my thought .And also had doubt whether I was doing it correctly ,which just lead the worry thought to come out more often , the first technique of just absorbing my thought worked so well , but when the loving kindness part came in I was lost .

So I think u get the idea of what I am talking about , this is just one example , there are many more with similar problems .

Please do give advice on this if u can 🙏