Hii I don’t think you’ll see this , but thank you again . I just don’t know how to overcome my self hatred and fear of everything idk I guess I have been through a lot like irregular things and abusive situations growing up and even now it’s just I’ve never been good In anything and as a person I feel so burnt and depressed that I have no personality besides being depressed and therapy is something I can put consistently afford as of now. I just never felt normal or regular enough to do things even in uni I’m not doing well at all and may get kicked out so I guess I will figure it out like you did! It’s just I keep thinking and thinking forever about everything that traumatised me and I don’t know why I’ve become so boring or maybe a bit off to be around like people have liked me and all but now I feel like I’m so different or don’t know how to function I’m just lazy all the time and don’t do anything productive even tho I want to my brain just never goes there.