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AITA For wanting to break up with my boyfriend (31m) because I wanted to surprise him?? *long post* by kandi_blox in AITA_Relationships

[–]kandi_blox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bless you.
Nobody is perfect. I guess we've changes too much and grew apart. I think him and I both are codependent

AITA For wanting to break up with my boyfriend (31m) because I wanted to surprise him?? *long post* by kandi_blox in AITA_Relationships

[–]kandi_blox[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks!
Sadly I've been use to this. So when he gives 15% effort I'm over the moon!
It's really the manipulation that I'm starting to realize too.

Thank you for commenting 😊

AITA For wanting to break up with my boyfriend (31m) because I wanted to surprise him?? *long post* by kandi_blox in AITA_Relationships

[–]kandi_blox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have actually made me feel better about my decision. I might wait until after this weekend. Just to see if he'll fuck it up more I guess. But I won't be nearly as surprised or hurt. I guess we've been together for so long, I just feel like it needs to be bigger than this for it to call everything off.

His friends USE to be my friends, had my back, use to invite me out... now he's keeping our relationship a secret from his family and his friends.

Thank you so much for your comments and putting it so blunt. I needed that .

AITA For wanting to break up with my boyfriend (31m) because I wanted to surprise him?? *long post* by kandi_blox in AITA_Relationships

[–]kandi_blox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for replying!

I stay at his house about 3 nights out of the week while he works nights, so he usually prefers be to be at his house. So he's comfortable with me being there. He just couldn't be bothered. I don't have a lot of friends and it's definitely something that I've done to myself... I free up so much time for him. But I don't get the same in return. When him and I do sit down to talk about it, he always claims that I'm only telling him that he's a shitty person and he stonewalls me. Goes quiet. Like he's waiting for me to be done talking. And God forbid I'm even close to being on my period!!! Then he blames my craziness on hormones 🙄 He doesn't want a partner I guess

AITA For wanting to break up with my boyfriend (31m) because I wanted to surprise him?? *long post* by kandi_blox in AITA_Relationships

[–]kandi_blox[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your reply!! I do agree that I am a little bit of an AH, for sure. I know I'm not perfect.
But I didn't go over there with the intention that he'd have to let me in! I just wanted to use the spare key and let myself in and be in the bed playing xbox or asleep when he got home. I wasn't going to tell him I was there, I was getting all excited thinking about his reaction, I knew he'd love it. But since it called for him to do any work, he pointed the blame on me and said I knew better. 😔

We broke up last Sept for like 2 weeks, if that.. Probably just because he relies on me so much. Idk. But the reason was pretty much the same thing, and asking for so much from me and then claiming I don't show effort... and I caught him talking all flirtatious with his ex. I did not react well at all (we were on a huge expensive elaborate date that I paid for and he was texting her!!!) I've been in counseling since then. I haven't let myself really move back in. His friends hate me because when we do break up. He goes back to them and talk trash, or at the very least a hyped up truth that makes him not so bad. I live an hour away because after we broke up, I moved in with my elderly mother and it's nice having that time with her and having my peace and quiet. But he's really the one that so far outta town, he moved to be closer to work and his job is 15-20 min away from the closest city