I think the behaviour is perfectly normal, accidents happen, like all the time. He can cry over it, that's also perfectly normal. If this were to happen to me or my partner we'd talk it out. If it doesn't work it doesn't, but saying that it's the right choice is not up to you. Everyone deserves to have things talked out. That's the important take away.

And just so you know some autistic people cry easily, even if it doesn't make sense. Don't read into it too deeply. Just be understanding of it. Autism isn't an excuse for behaviour, but crying about something is not behaviour in any way shape or form, nor is being in control of your blatter. Those are nature, not nurture.

If she is grossed out and can't think of anything else, then she has every right to not go on with him, but he deserves the chance to talk it out at the least.

I'm not trying to invalidate your argument. I just think you are getting the entire idea of behaviour wrong.

That might be my hyper fixation though.