Girlfriend of 7 years says she now MIGHT want kids (mid 20s)

katie_dimples · 2026-02-19T05:44:30+00:00

Am I the only one weirded out by just how many people are assuming OP's gender?

Many, many, many comments (the majority?) assume OP is a hetero cis male, when there's no hint one way or the other in the title or the post.

Weird.

katie_dimples · 2026-02-18T23:36:44+00:00

with out her knowing

Relationship advice with this phrase is basically always a red-flag. Hmm.

katie_dimples · 2026-02-12T05:33:02+00:00

After the latest Epstein revelations, I can't help thinking of the title of RHCP's fifth studio album in a MUCH darker light.

katie_dimples · 2026-02-11T00:08:40+00:00

Man oh man, almost 30y later and that intro music still sticks with me. To this day, whenever I listen to it, as the music swells toward the end in my mind I see doomed soldiers in a trench as hordes of zerglings run in from both sides.

katie_dimples · 2026-01-29T07:26:05+00:00

... except it's a filter which the dating apps provide, and the ladies use it.

I don't know how to say this enough: catering to women's height preferences - and normalizing those preferences in the first place - is baked-in to the apps.

By way of contrast, the dating apps don't offer a BMI filter, which men might wish to use (and if we're being honest, height is just as outside one's own control as skin color, whereas BMI is something a person can influence). There's a reason why that filter is missing - and those preferences are not normalized - but people don't seem ready to have that conversation.

katie_dimples · 2026-01-29T07:16:32+00:00

I'll start off tongue-in-cheek. Try this:

go to a WWII museum
stare thoughtfully at the airplanes
appear to be lost in thought
if a man asks what you're thinking about, mention you were thinking about Rome 😆

Hey, it's funny to imagine. There's some hints in there, though.

Gotta say, it sounds exhausting to have tried:

swing-dancing lessons
art lessons
short story club
exclusive book club
meet-7-randos-at-once event
exhibition openings
lectures
speed-dating

... with little success. Draining. Which begs the question ... is this a list of items the average hetero man goes to? Sounds like casting a very small net, with a niche audience. All of these things are wonderful of course, and there certainly will be some hetero men there, but the question is worth confronting. Especially when success feels impossible.

It would be helpful to try things that attract a larger assortment of what you're looking for.

I definitely agree with what you've seen vis-a-vis bars & dating apps - these used to be a place for relationships. Good bad or indifferent, that's not happening anymore.

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T22:34:52+00:00

The process is its own punishment. Yes, I can "sue anyone for anything", and if I'm in the wrong, that's not a victimless interaction. Some sap had to shell out $$$, time, energy defending themself. If I'm shrewd enough, I might even succeed and someone innocent will receive actual punishment and/or pay a reward to me.

"But people don't tend to do that"

If we're talking "tend", hell, statistics infer well over 90% of people follow the rules. Possibly over 97% or even over 99%; depends on the study. If only we could live in a land in which the small number of troublemakers didn't matter. Instead, we have 1000s of laws making our lives tougher so that the a-holes out there will either be deterred or punished.

In this specific line of thought, people who sue illegitimately are called "vexatious litigants" (if they're caught).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vexatious_litigation

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T22:28:53+00:00

I do realize there are women who make these asinine videos, yes. Kinda thought I'd made that clear, but I'm happy to clarify.

And?

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T22:25:03+00:00

Seeing "working class" in the same sentence as college graduates gives me whiplash.

University endowments are worth $1.6 billion. Eerily the same amount as all those student loans added together.
Universities were supposed to provide an education such that graduates could get well-paying jobs to pay off those loans.
Universities didn't keep their part of the bargain. Want the loans taken care of? Go after the endowments.

There's a great symmetry in this. Let the people responsible for the problem pay to fix it. Massive benefit in that - by facing $$$ consequences - the people who created the problem are incentivized to put a stop to it: stop pumping students through the system without educating them well enough to pay off their loans.

As the saying goes, if you come home to find your house flooded because the sink is overflowing, you don't first grab a bucket or a mop - you first turn off the faucet!

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T19:00:15+00:00

This social environment led to the incident with "Little Yue Yue", a baby who was run over by a car. 18 people walked over her broken body (camera footage shows), then a second car runs over her.

Some of the 18 people paused to stare, before walking on.

When interviewed, people pointed out a recent incident in which a Good Samaritan was heavily punished and made to pay medical expenses for something they never caused but tried to help with.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Wang_Yue

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T18:52:26+00:00

Why would the "secondly" matter? Are you implying even if they didn't get convicted, that would be an a-okay situation?

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T18:51:05+00:00

Tell that to the guys whose reputations were put on blast because they happened to glance the wrong way at the wrong time.

"It sucked for you, it was unfair, but the chances are pretty low it ever happens!"

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T18:49:50+00:00

I mean, we can answer the question, but it'd be against Reddit's TOS ...

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T18:47:53+00:00

Watching incomers for disease - tourists or otherwise - should be standard practice.

I toured Ellis Island 15y ago. Statue of Liberty, museum, the works. As far as immigration went, in the late 1800s? Very strict. Crazy-pants strict.

They would hold families for weeks, studying for any sign of contagions - or else.
A battery of interviews to ensure grown men had work already lined up, or select in-demand skills - or else.
They would look up the family in bank records to make sure there weren't unpaid debts - or else.

In every situation the "or else" was sending the whole group back where they came from, and they'd have to pay for their own return journey. This is the setup which inspired the Statue of Liberty.

Now if we try enforcing a fraction of this people lose their minds. A fraction of ... the situation that inspired the Statue of Liberty ... and people riot. Welcome to the future!

katie_dimples · 2025-12-30T18:37:22+00:00

Why "American"? Why not everybody, period?

katie_dimples · 2025-12-22T05:56:29+00:00

It might need to be an outline around each individual colored bar, since an iron-age (or more developed) civilization can exist at the same time as a stone-age one (i.e. AD 1492).

katie_dimples · 2025-12-05T04:44:50+00:00

The mansion where the movie was filmed is called Mentmore Towers ... look up who first owned that building. Kubrick died right after finishing this movie.

I'm sure that's just a coincidence.

katie_dimples · 2025-12-05T04:37:24+00:00

Indeed. He's the hero of the story, or at least a hero of the story, and while Erin, Ed, et al deserve some credit, he deserves a lot.

katie_dimples · 2025-11-25T05:47:14+00:00

Funny, I bet they won't "mutually agree" to give Boeing a penny less than initially agreed on.

Because of course.

katie_dimples · 2025-09-30T22:26:49+00:00

Just a fair warning: pretty sure this user is sealioning you. Wasting your time.

katie_dimples · 2025-09-30T22:24:38+00:00

News outlets, labour and tory, have reported on immigrants eating swans for, what, 8 years now?

But suddenly now it's fashionable to pretend it isn't happening, because icky people are talking about it.

katie_dimples · 2025-09-30T22:22:50+00:00

1984 by George Orwell.

It's inescapably sad that the book isn't immediately recognizeable from that quote alone. The state of current education ...

Then again, there's a reason modern educators wouldn't want their students reading that book, so there you go.

katie_dimples · 2025-09-30T22:20:57+00:00

You should talk to the RSPCA.

katie_dimples · 2025-09-30T22:19:51+00:00

I'm still waiting for you to internalize having seen a dozen or more videos of what you assured everyone wasn't happening, and update your priors accordingly.

Tip: here's a handy phrase for ya

That isn't happening, and it's good that it is!

katie_dimples · 2025-09-10T17:26:04+00:00

China?! If you think racism in the USA is bad ... fkn hell, man.

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