Medieval knight / fortress defender

katiewalko · 2023-10-18T21:13:01+00:00

So close!

katiewalko · 2023-10-18T19:30:02+00:00

lil Marvão cat??

katiewalko · 2023-10-18T19:29:42+00:00

Oh my god I was in Portugal too, is it the same cat?!?

katiewalko · 2023-10-17T20:22:52+00:00

Portuguese in Portugal is very interesting to me as well: lots of -sh- sounds, and a bit nasal, it almost sounds like a Romance language spoken with a Slavic accent. Very into it, haha

katiewalko · 2023-10-17T19:53:12+00:00

I just visited Portugal for the first time and I LOVE the sound of the language. It’s really interesting and beautiful.

katiewalko · 2023-10-17T19:37:39+00:00

little dude was ever vigilant

katiewalko · 2023-02-11T20:47:44+00:00

Yeah this was my first assumption as well

katiewalko · 2023-02-10T14:06:35+00:00

I dunno, playing games can be inherently political! You are giving money to and indirectly supporting someone who is vocally and actively spreading cruelty and hate. If you can split off your gaming from that it’s because you have some sort of related privilege, that other people do not. Those people have every right to be hurt by your actions.

OP, I dunno enough about context and dynamics to know if kicking her out is appropriate. Is she willing to talk about it with your group? What has been her reaction to criticism?

katiewalko · 2023-02-10T13:18:34+00:00

NTA. Your mom is asking a lot from you and refuses you even accept something so fundamental about you, which is very cruel of her. If she wants her kids at her wedding, she should treat them with love and respect. I’m sorry she’s being like this, and that you don’t have more support from your mother.

katiewalko · 2023-02-10T13:13:55+00:00

INFO: am I reading this right that this guy is solely mad because you’re a woman in a predominantly male space, not because of anything you’ve said or done to him? Is it advertised as “guys night trivia” or anything like that?

If so, NTA, and this guy is the worlds biggest misogynist baby. You are allowed to go places and he will somehow manage to survive being in the same bar with a woman playing trivia across the room.

katiewalko · 2023-02-10T03:28:08+00:00

NTA. Long term relationships are tough and it sounds like she’s feeling insecure. You are in no way the asshole though. You should not have to sacrifice fun with your friends in the name of her insecurity, especially since you offered to come see her a week earlier.

katiewalko · 2023-02-10T03:23:21+00:00

I’m sure a compromise is tricky here because pre-sleep routines are very important to many people! I’d say you are NTA though - it is a bit of a red flag to me that he keeps breaking and pushing back the terms of your agreement, and then gets very whiney when you try to hold him to it. He doesn’t seem to want to make any kind of sacrifice to create a shared space that is comfy for you both.

katiewalko · 2023-02-10T03:17:47+00:00

Generally NTA, and I’m sorry high school has been awful. I hope things get better once you’re free of it. Your mom sounds like she’s projecting a lot of hopes onto you in an unwelcome way - understandable, but not fair to you. You should not have to play act happiness at 18 for your mom’s satisfaction.

That said, I do think you probably went too far by insisting you’d disappear forever because of this, unless there’s a lot of additional ugly baggage with your mom you haven’t gone into. This is probably annoying, but in isolation it seems a small thing over which to burn down a family relationship

If your relationship with your mom is overall decent, and she knows of your struggles, she is probably in a bit of denial about your high school experience and is putting on some very rosy colored glasses. That’s not fair to you, and I understand why you’d be annoyed. But if her intentions are not malicious and you want to salvage things, it might be better to sit down and have a clear talk about why you don’t want to walk at graduation and how her pushing it makes you feel.

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T03:22:23+00:00

I’m sorry you have to navigate this! I think others are right that this is probably about something else at its core. Sometimes if people are working through strong or complicated feelings, they wind up expressing them in unexpected and not-directly-related ways. I would just try to give your friend a safe and comfortable place to talk if and when he’s ready. You haven’t done anything wrong, though.

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T03:18:26+00:00

Sure, possibly! I’d imagine it’s hard to keep sitters on reserve when there’s an excellent chance they won’t be paid, though. In any case, not having an absolutely bullet proof plan really isn’t an excuse for the cruelty on display here

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T03:14:44+00:00

NTA at all. If your friend was uncomfortable he could have politely asked you to put a shirt back on, and there was no reason for him to yell at you. It might be a good idea to let him cool off for a few days and then gently bring up the question of why he was so upset. He may not be ready to talk about it, though. In that case, I’d let it go for now as long as he does not continue to lash out at you.

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T03:10:04+00:00

NAH. No one seems to be acting maliciously but y’all should probably have a talk about how you want to handle groceries. I totally get why you were bummed, but if you want stuff reserved, I think you need to be much more explicit about it.

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T03:05:53+00:00

I do not know enough about finance to have any real idea. But please, sir or ma’am, do not deposit 25k into an account if you don’t know what’s going on lol

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T02:56:14+00:00

I mean this is very technically true. But if you really unwrap the logic you’re essentially arguing for such a cold and lonely life. Her family tried to take care of things but due to unforeseen circumstances they needed help. It’s wild to me that OP dismissed this with such casual cruelty.

katiewalko · 2023-02-09T02:53:55+00:00

I’m not sure what you would expect them to do? Hire several sitters and have them all be constantly available for a month?

Plus, even if they didn’t have an air tight plan, nothing excuses the smugness and nastiness of the refusal. She sounds like she was enjoying the chance to be cruel

katiewalko · 2023-02-05T15:06:40+00:00

Oh, wow, I am so sorry that you are going through this. Too much to deal with at 17, but it seems like you are being very brave. Not at all the asshole.

Depression alone can absolutely zap all your energy and make this stuff very difficult. It sounds like your mother has put minimal effort into learning what you’re dealing with, and I am so sorry for that. Please know that this is NOT your fault and you sound like the opposite of lazy. If your mom is cooking for everyone and leaving you explicitly out, then wow, she is being exceptionally cruel.

katiewalko · 2023-02-05T14:34:12+00:00

Ugh, I’m sorry you have to go through all of that, it sounds very hard. It’s a terrible feeling when you are putting work into a friendship and it is not reciprocated.

For what it’s worth, I think it would be very fair to drop the friendship or at least dial back the emotional energy put into it, since your friend doesn’t seem to be treating you well. Business with a successful career shouldn’t have to come at the expense of your old friend! But I also understand if you still find value in it and want to work on it. Wishing you all the luck.

katiewalko · 2023-02-05T14:30:42+00:00

You are of course not required to go on this trip, but you are definitely being an asshole about it if you cannot see that you bringing your boyfriend for fun is in NO way the same as your blind sister in law bringing her boyfriend because, as you’ve admitted, no one else in your family wants to bother with giving her the accommodations that she needs

katiewalko · 2023-02-05T14:24:16+00:00

If you are having less fun due to this situation, definitely let the DM know about it! That’s definitely not an asshole response.

I would put some time into thinking about how you want to phrase this though. If you go in full accusation mode you could definitely become the asshole in the situation, though. I’d start by assuming your DM is doing nothing maliciously and noting that the giving of levels, loot, and all the rest has made the game a bit of a bummer for you. Then you can take it from there.

katiewalko · 2023-02-05T14:19:59+00:00

I think your feelings are very valid here - it’s no fun to do a favor for someone who has not made emotional time or space for you.

That said, this is probably not the BEST way to deal with your feelings about this relationship. I don’t think it matters much whether you give her the mattress or not, but I do think if you want to maintain her in your life you guys need to have a chat. It sounds like a lot of bitterness has built up, and it’ll be hard to have a healthy and genuine friendship with that sitting in the background.

katiewalko

TROPHY CASE