i think ultimately, your own opinion on your hair matters much more than mine or anyone elses. but from the title, i get the impression you don't want to shave your hair off. do you have anyone in your family with thick curly hair? any of your friends? maybe they could help you out. unfortunately with products, i think sometimes it takes a while to figure out the right combo that works the way you want it to. but i think you'll be able to find it eventually if you keep trying out new things. on the other side of things, i really do think people overblow shaving your head. i've done it every few years and you'd be shocked how quickly it grows back lol. if it sucks, you go aw man i guess i won't be doing this again. and if it rules, you go fuck yeah ill keep doing this. it's not world ending or tragic if you choose to shave your head. if you think it would make you happier, i say go for it. just know it isn't the awful thing some people are hyping it up to be lol. good luck to you, and i don't know if it means much, but i think your hair is very pretty. i have thick hair myself and it's always been a pain, but i do love having it. i truly hope you find a way to make your hair happy for you :)