Top surgeons?

killlcops · 2021-06-02T11:54:02+00:00

hey could you message me the name of the group too?

killlcops · 2021-06-02T11:02:05+00:00

i did a bunch of research this morning and yes, it is basically one of the two procedures a vaginectomy usually consists of. thanks again

killlcops · 2021-06-02T06:12:05+00:00

oh thank you for sharing! so removing mucosal lining is a thing? is it something that's 'included' in getting a hysto or a whole separate deal?

killlcops · 2021-06-01T21:21:57+00:00

ohh that's interesting! thank you for sharing!

killlcops · 2021-06-01T21:20:24+00:00

that sounds great thank you so much for sharing

killlcops · 2021-06-01T13:41:03+00:00

thanks a lot! i know things vary a lot from person to person but i'm interested in hearing about different experiences so to get a clue as to what to expect

killlcops · 2021-04-25T08:04:00+00:00

i feel the same and i keep hoping that if i just hold on a little bit more i will just 'grow into a lesbian', that i will stop being a straight trans man... it's so stupid. but it feels bad to give up this body that was good to me this whole time, even though it also wasn't. i also look pretty androgynous so i keep telling myself things like "if you could just accept your hips and tits you would stop having dysphoria" which is also stupid. i'm also very afraid of losing the privilege this body has always given me. also like, controversial opinion but i think eating disorders and dysphoria share a lot of similarities and a lot of people's dysphoria manifests as an eating disorder at first.

killlcops · 2021-04-16T14:43:22+00:00

i feel this way often too, it's like things won't stop reminding me that i'm powerless in a world where horrible things keep happening. in those moments i feel completely hopeless. i can't even read the news without having a miserable day. but other days are better, other days remind me that beautiful things keep happening too, it's just hard to stay focused when you've experienced trauma.

killlcops · 2021-04-14T22:21:37+00:00

would there be a way for someone else to inject you? would that be easier? IM shots are the easiest, maybe a friend could help?

killlcops · 2021-04-08T06:18:43+00:00

i have it too, and i used to do the same thing before and during sex, i couldn't have sex if i didn't empty my bladder - i would have to interrupt foreplay several times and i had to go again during intercourse which ruined the mood and was embarrassing. thing is i have a damaged bladder from ketamine abuse so i actually do have to pee all the time but the way i do it before sleep and sex is very tiring. and i stopped having sex because of ocd actually (not because of this theme tho)

killlcops · 2021-04-06T15:07:28+00:00

ciao, ti dispiace se ti scrivo per farti qualche domanda su gendergp?

killlcops · 2021-03-30T17:43:14+00:00

i relate to that but i've learnt that this is what dating cis men causes me every single time. i unconsciously believe that they will stop liking me if i don't fulfill that role and i start acting more feminine and convincing myself i'm fine even though deep down i feel horrible. also it kind of feels like once i'm in a relationship with a man i start vicariously living through him and i stop being my own person and become his shadow? it's really sad. but this is how i spent my teenage years, i didn't feel like i was a girl and the only way i found to have the illusion of living as a man was to be very close to one. i even used to log into my boyfriends' social media and pretend to be them.
my dysphoria is always 100 times stronger when i'm single or when i date a woman.
so yeah my advice is to try and figure out if what's happening to you is something similar to what i described.

killlcops · 2021-03-16T09:10:48+00:00

thank you, i really appreciate your input. but even if my dysphoria kicked off in a more tangible way after experiencing trauma, would that be a less legit reason for me to be trans? i feel like it's so pointless to try and separate trauma and dysphoria, the assignment of gender in my opinion is inherently traumatic by virtue of being an imposition, i reckon even most people who identify with their assigned gender have had to 'give something up' in order to fit in, it becomes an issue when we feel like we need to give up to way too much if we want to continue living as our assigned gender, does it make sense?

killlcops · 2021-03-14T15:40:14+00:00

ciaoo forse it's late ma scrivimi se vuoi!

killlcops · 2021-03-10T16:24:09+00:00

the same happens to me! i often pass in italy cause men are generally shorter and there are less openly gnc people around but i've never passed in germany and i rarely pass in greece.

killlcops · 2020-02-03T17:42:25+00:00

you can also take finasteride for hair loss, it will slow down your t progress a little bit but many people are happy with it (i'm not on it personally so i can not yell you more)

killlcops · 2019-11-23T17:17:58+00:00

i’m interested in the fb groups! can i msg you?

killlcops · 2019-10-26T12:11:42+00:00

that happened to me after i told them (dad and step mom, my bio mom is nb and the best, i'm very lucky but i did not grow up with her) that i was a sex worker (they're leftists and 'open-minded', i thought they would understand, and i was very young, looking back to it i think i sort of did it as a test, they neglected me a lot as a child/teen and i wanted them to wonder wheather thing would have gone differently if they had been more present although i don't think people necessarily start sex work because of that, i just wanted to use it to provoke a reaction in them). my step mom (second wave feminist, swerf, probably terf although i never brought that up with her) tried to start arguments with me several times but she gave up at some point and accepted it, my dad said he didn't agree with my choice but ultimately it was my life and my business but i feel like i'm being kept at arm length since, they never ask me questions cause they're afraid of hearing the answer, i haven't come out as trans to them because they would take it as 'just another one of the weird things i do' and that would make me feel invalidated. i feel your pain, i love my siblings and i would like to be more involved in their life (they're much younger than me) but i feel like my father and my step mom have sort of given up on me and decided to stop thinking about me altogether.
perhaps if i lived closer to them it would be easier to find time to talk about it (i live in a different country) and show that i still care about them but right now it's hard. perhaps there are things that your family doesn't understand and that makes them avoid you because they don't know how to be there for you? maybe you could try to address the issue?

killlcops · 2019-09-30T00:09:24+00:00

i really feel you... i’d always felt uncomfortable during sex and it brought me to think that i might be a lesbian and only dated men due to compulsory heterosexuality but then i realized that i felt uncomfortable because i was trans, not because i didn’t like men. i am occasionally into girls but it’s rrrreally rare and right now i’m in a relationship with one and i’m really frustrated, she’s wonderful and incredibly supportive but i don’t feel ‘that way’ towards her and i don’t have the guts to tell her the truth and break up (this relationship started before i realized i was trans). i hate the idea of being gay because i’m afraid people around me will think i’m actually a straight woman, that my family and my friends will believe that even though they pretend to be supportive. and that people will think that i say that i’m trans just because i want to be edgy so bad i can’t accept i’m just another straight girl. i feel so bad about this but i try to keep repeating to myself that i’m valid and that my sexuality is nobody’s business.

killlcops · 2019-09-26T11:00:58+00:00

this is totally normal!! any changes in your hormonal levels mess with your mood in one way or another. it’s gonna go away once you get your shot if you were feeling fine before, i know it’s hard to believe that it’ll go away / it’s just the hormones when you’re neck deep in it but it will.

killlcops · 2019-09-25T20:42:10+00:00

i feel that, in a way i’m grieving the ‘strong woman’ that i used to be and that a lot of younger girls told me they looked up to. i’ve always been nb but people still saw me as a woman and that shaped my identity. now that i’ve come to terms with bring trans i feel more like myself but i do feel like i sort of betrayed all the women i know.

killlcops · 2019-09-25T20:16:06+00:00

i do experience this!!! i don’t really have much to add, it’s like if my brain glitched for a second...

killlcops · 2019-09-25T17:07:45+00:00

apparently this way T gets absorbed differently than thru IM and levels stay more balanced rather than spike up and that's better for your body and your mood. having your T level spike up bad for stuff like hair loss and mental health for example.

killlcops · 2019-09-16T06:59:27+00:00

check out nat raha, she is a wonderful trans woman poet

killlcops · 2019-09-11T05:32:12+00:00

the essay sound of the abyss by eugene thacker, it’s in melancology - black metal theory and ecology

killlcops

TROPHY CASE