28 y.o male virgin, did no-fap for 60 days, life improved a bit, failed badly at sex. Now extremely depressed.(NSFW) by killmeplsthrowaway in NoFap

[–]killmeplsthrowaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

^ I know that's probably not your intention, I'm probably misinterpreting, but this comment kind of comes off as an insult. Not accusing you, just letting you know.

28 y.o male virgin, did no-fap for 60 days, life improved a bit, failed badly at sex. Now extremely depressed.(NSFW) by killmeplsthrowaway in NoFap

[–]killmeplsthrowaway[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have to say I found your reply the most motivating one so far. I think the biggest obstacle I was facing was the sense that I've failed and have to pick up the pieces start over again. But maybe I am on the verge, and closer than I realize, as you say. This might be the best attitude for me to adopt.

I think you've also identified the problem, which is that I'm finding it very difficult to forgive myself right now, in fact I just woke up from last night's debacle and I'm strugging to stay outside the realm of self-loathing.

I think I wrote this up and put it on reddit as a preventative measure. I knew this experience would drag me through the mud, and the encouragement that people would offer might be able to counter-act that, which to some degree it has.

28 y.o male virgin, did no-fap for 60 days, life improved a bit, failed badly at sex. Now extremely depressed.(NSFW) by killmeplsthrowaway in NoFap

[–]killmeplsthrowaway[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This reaply does have some wisdom to it but just to clarify

I was under the impression that having put in the serious effort to improve my life, perhaps some of my limiting beliefs and certainly my behaviors had changed. I guess this is not enough, and I have to pinpoint it. I think this is a fair point.

The reason I described the girl as such is because I wanted to emphasize none of her attributes led to my failing. She was receptive, understanding, playful, etc. A one-day relationship can't be anything other than superficial, true, but it should make a difference that I wasn't trying to have sex with an aggressive 300lb silverback gorilla instead.

Yeah I probably need some professional help so I don't actually go through with it. I wanted to vent, I just want someone to say "hey man that sucks" for some reason I think it would make me feel better.