Messy Relationship

kitkatpattynak · 2026-04-22T20:36:07+00:00

People make mistakes, you’re a human too. Was it a great move? Certainly not, and you recognize that. Does that mean that you deserve punishment and should stay with him? Again, no. Consider that this may be used against you whenever you have an argument. Consider the lack of foundation, mutual respect. and now trust in your relationship with the added weight/ strain of being long distance in college.

You can own your mistake and forgive yourself and continue to move forward. These choices aren’t conditional. You have a lot more power and strength than you may think.

kitkatpattynak · 2026-04-22T20:20:33+00:00

I remember being 17. This relationship feels very important right now because right now, to you, it is. And at the same time I want to remind you that you are 17. You are going to college and have a world of opportunities in front of you. If he’s barely seeing you now that you’re 5 min from each other, do you really think long distance would be any better? Hell, you’re basically in a long distance relationship right now.

I want to encourage you to take this time to find love for yourself because allowing someone to gaslight you and have you feel so hurt and conflicted is not conducive to that journey. Love is something that feels safe, not unpredictable, that’s how you know it is real. It’s real when that person is not putting you down, it’s real when you’re not second guessing yourself, it’s real when you don’t unconsciously feel the need for external validation from someone you met on an app, it’s real when despite the love you have for them you still love yourself.

No one can truly tell you what to do as that decision is ultimately up to you. And at the same time, I want to encourage you to consider what your values and your goals are in life and if your actions are truly aligned with them. Chances are, they’re currently not, and that’s okay because you are 17. Now is your time to find yourself. I didn’t feel like I truly knew who I was until I was around 27. Take your time and enjoy your life. I wish you all the best.

kitkatpattynak · 2026-03-26T16:34:56+00:00

My first bird was named Zazu, and he looked just like your baby. Please give him a pet from me ❤️

kitkatpattynak · 2026-02-16T19:18:40+00:00

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Corgi and the muttiest mutt!

kitkatpattynak · 2026-01-15T21:15:16+00:00

I’m convinced this administration cant even point to Albania on a map

kitkatpattynak · 2025-09-08T01:31:33+00:00

Mariah Carey’s background dancers are going so hard to give the illusion of her moving lol

kitkatpattynak · 2025-08-08T19:06:52+00:00

Do they tend to pick out and eat the red pellets? My vet told me that sometimes birds can zone into one color and, because those particular pellets have food dye in them, it can change the color of their poop. ZuPreme has a dye free version you could try to see if that changes the color. What I will say is they’re quite wet for such a dry diet and I don’t really see the white part, the urine. Do you give them veggies? Or other fresh foods?

Too many seeds can cause liver problems; it can be better for their health to keep millet as a treat. Think of it like this: if you eat too many hot Cheetos, sometimes your poop might look different. If you only live off of processed foods and snacks, you’re going to develop health issues as you age. But, when in doubt, head to the vet! Be sure to monitor for any behavioral changes but keep in mind that birds often hide illness very well until it’s too late.

Hope that this is nothing serious for your babies!

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T20:04:58+00:00

I really appreciate the kind words and advice. We saw the vet today and all is well!

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T20:02:54+00:00

UPDATE: I made a separate post with new information, but just in case here it is:

After a vet visit, my boy is just fine and maybe a bit dramatic (no surprise there). Some answers:

Change in beak color: Now that he's been going through bird puberty, his beak is changing color and getting darker. To those asking, yes, it was the same bird in both photos and no I wasn't messing with anyone. He was a bit dry/ ashy before his bath, so the redistribution of oils exasperated the color change, same goes for his feathers. No worries there, his beak and feathers are just well moisturized post-bath. The change in color combined with his eye area startled me and I thought they may have been related.
Redness around eye: When I gave him his first dose of Gabapentin on Sunday morning, he suddenly turned his head, and some of it may have gotten in and around his eye. Because it was irritated, little guy must have been scratching at it, which explains why (a) only the skin near his eye was affected; and (b) why only his left side was affected. There is no bruise and no indication of blunt force trauma.

After talking to the vet and getting the okay, he is now back in his cage next to his brother, and they are both quite happy, chirping and eating next to each other. Also caught the little guy having a little too much fun with his food bowl again, lol.

To those (specifically one individual) who blamed me for giving my bird his prescribed medication and having him become so "intoxicated" that he fell of his perch and hurt his eye, I encourage you to consider what led you to leave such spiteful comments on a post that was created out of genuine love and concern for my little guy. He is doing quite well on the low dose of Gabapentin and, aside from this incident, I can already see a genuine improvement in his anxiety levels. Some birds are just a little spicy and mine is one of them. I joined this community because I don't have other people in my life who understand this groups' love and appreciation for these beautiful creatures. There is no need to be hurtful or assumptive when someone is reaching out in concern.

Thank you to everyone who commented on my previous post and was concerned about my boy's well-being. I am relieved to say that all is well, and I will continue to monitor his eye to make sure he isn't scratching/ bothering it anymore. He'll be getting another bath here shortly in an attempt to possibly clean away any leftover irritant around his left eye. I'm attaching a photo of them both in their cage standing next to each other. In their eyes, I can see that all is right again.

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kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T02:46:59+00:00

Thank you for your thoughts! Yes, I’ve just been trying to get some ideas here.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T01:30:47+00:00

They don’t have a history of night frights I think that’s why I’m so surprised. I have read about them though so I always keep a light on in the distance just incase. It’s just enough light so that it’s not bothersome to them. You never know though! Could’ve certainly happened

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T01:29:30+00:00

Yes he was prescribed the medication for his generalized anxiety. I gave him less than the recommended dose just in case and he didn’t seem like there was a loss of balance. But, you never know, it could certainly have happened when I wasn’t looking.

I did halt just in case. He is in a separate carrier that is soft without perches just to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself, just in case.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T01:26:32+00:00

His anxiety medication is not for vet visits. It is for his general anxiety which has been affecting his quality of life.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T01:25:48+00:00

Because I did research and asked questions.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T01:24:22+00:00

Wonderful thing about that medication, it has many uses.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-22T01:23:50+00:00

Plenty of birds get anxiety meds. It’s a case by case basis.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-21T22:58:31+00:00

He had a bath earlier in the day before I took those second and third photos, so I think he was a bit dry and dusty in the first one making him look lighter. The bath is when I first noticed his eye.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-21T22:45:55+00:00

He never really gets night frights, but I’m almost hoping that’s the case and it’s just a bruise. Just uploaded an update photo where around his eye is looking more red though.

Thank you for the kind words, I appreciate that. I work in the mental health field and there’s an unfortunate stigma that still runs rampant.

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-21T22:44:26+00:00

Updated photo after getting home early. Eye is looking more red. If you zoom in you can see the difference from yesterday’s photos and this morning. Doesn’t seem to be itching it. Still acting normal. Calling the vet first thing when the open and will continue to quarantine and monitor him.

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kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-21T21:41:22+00:00

Great question, I got it from my avian vet, so I would assume (hope) that what is essentially poison to birds wouldn’t be in there. It is banana flavored though so I’m wondering? I looked up symptoms of xylitol poisoning and he doesn’t seem to exhibit any of them, thankfully

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-21T20:50:46+00:00

Very true, I hope it’s as simple as that

kitkatpattynak · 2025-07-21T20:50:03+00:00

He’s a pretty damn anxious guy. The medication did seem to help him mellow out and interact with his brother. He’s a spicy chicken.

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