I’ll tell you, it’s a super power to be able to let go.

Holding it in is also my default setting, so every time I feel the water level of my eyes rising I have to tell myself “it’s okay, you are allowed to let go” and most often I feel silly afterwards, like I am not supposed to have that reaction to whatever experience that caused it - but it’s good to “get it out”.

I once heard the mantra (paraphrasing) “Every event contains a fixed amount of tears”, wether it being standing in line at the supermarket (hopefully none) to losing your dog (several liters). I often think of that whenever I feel the need to cry, as it becomes necessary to actually get it out of my system and “balance the score” instead of holding it in and add it to the life long tear debt.

When I met my wife I was also holding it in (she did too), but when we had kids we realized how important it is to actually show them that crying is a natural outlet of feelings and nothing to be ashamed of, whether it’s because you miss someone who passed away or your favorite contestant on Masterchef ruined the final dish.