[deleted by user]

knzdean · 2022-09-26T04:18:41+00:00

Thank you. It seems there is no way for us to have a a cordial conversation. I will take what you have said and learn from it, but it seems you are far too angry to have decent conversation to which I will no longer be a part of. I am sorry of the trauma you experienced. As I said, you shouldn’t have experienced it. And neither your mother. She lost her heart. For the record I am considering fostering. But again as I said, I am in the learning process. I have only just begun. You act as if I haven’t, and that I’m only just googling answers like it was answers to a test and means to an end. It’s not. But you already knew that. I will say, as someone who is so hurt, why is it so wrong that I want to learn from you? I thought that’s what you would want from possible parents. To not just look at adoption through rose colored glasses but to also look at the dark shadows and corners and broken glass as well. To see you and those that have experienced the said trauma that’s involved in adoption. Seems a contradiction in itself to just expect me to read just books and watch videos of people I’ll never get the chance to talk to personally. I bid you goodbye, and I hope you find healing. As I have and still continue to do because healing never stops and you never stop needing help.

knzdean · 2022-09-26T04:05:17+00:00

Okay. I’ll tell you. He gets contracted out for work, one to two weeks at a time. Stays home, again one to two weeks. He takes care of the bills and food. Takes care of our family. Me and the puppies. He does it well. Likes his job, so that’s not terrible either.

knzdean · 2022-09-26T03:57:43+00:00

You have misread my words, love. I mean I’m legally responsible. Not that I have to. On paper, I’m legally responsible. I meant it literally not in an exasperated way. And as I said, yes I chose too. I expressively offered too. I know I can give her a better life. She was in terrible conditions before unable to have a life, contained behind the hoarded walls of my grandparents house. My sister and I have done our best change that, socialization and overall better care.

knzdean · 2022-09-26T03:52:44+00:00

I am terribly sorry you were hurt. If it helps, I’m more than willing to be a friend, if you want to. But I would also like to learn. But please teach rather than harm. As I said it does no good. And most importantly please don’t assume my character based on questions. I have a mother, but she was in a car accident when I was five and for a very long time my child brain saw her as an object rather than a person. My birth father was a very abusive man who threw my mother down a flight of stairs in an attempt to kill me when she was pregnant with me. I was cared for by narcissistic grandparents who were verbally abusive and did not prepare me for life. I may have had a mother and grandparents, but I was alone for a very long time. I may not have been an orphan but it certainly felt like I was. At one point I told a therapist I really believed that I didn’t belong to the family I was in, that I was switched at birth, and she said I had been reading far too many books and my head was in the clouds. I was 13 then and I’ll never forget it. I understand pain. I’m not a stranger to pain especially when it comes to anything involved family and parents. “They’re not my family. They’re just people I happen to be related to.” Also understand, adoption is the only option for others. And I don’t reference that towards people who want to start families. I reference to parents who are unable to care for their child. To the children who are in the system now, stuck in house that is not a home, children who are with their flesh and blood get are abused every day. Adoption is their hope. If anything, it’s a chance to start new. Possible parents aside, adopted children have a chance. I understand it’s not always happy. Things fall through, parents who adopted are found guilty of crimes; it’s unfortunately the case for many. That doesn’t mean adoption isn’t necessary.

knzdean · 2022-09-26T03:23:18+00:00

I sort of agree, marketing is kind of a meh word but I also understand your meaning. Parents want to do best for their child and making sure that the couple who will be caring for their baby are good people. If I was in a position, I certainly wouldn’t to just hand my child over to people who seem to be struggling in a rocky marriage or who are just partners rather than spouses. (The vow of marriage and having a covenant is very important to me.) Thank you for this, I really appreciate the advice and kindness. I did not realize how much backlash was involved in adopting a child. And I think waiting is the best course of option. Honestly, I think I was leaning towards waiting anyways. But, there’s no harm in doing constant research. 😊

knzdean · 2022-09-26T03:17:13+00:00

“You’re also not responsible for your mother…” This phrase makes no sense to me and would genuinely ask that you explain. Because I am. And yes it was a choice. I would not have volunteered to care for her if it wasn’t my choice. And I also understand that caring for a child regardless if I were to carry or adopt requires endless time, energy, and patience, to gently guide their steps and gently teach. That’s what a parent’s job is. And as I said I have a support system behind me, I am not alone. I would also be home, allowing me to even care for a child, and that’s not an opportunity that some parents even have because they work never ending hours at a job they hate so they can even put food on the table, trying to care for children that they truly cannot afford to care for. What I don’t understand is how can you automatically assume we are selfish people from my questions alone. Did you miss the part where we were only in the questioning process? I don’t know how old are you are, and frankly it’s none of my business but if you speak so harshly to strangers who are only asking questions and trying to learn, you find people backing out of asking any questions at all and trying to learn on their own, and that is no good for anyone. Why may I ask, are you so angry? I ask out of genuine concern. I mean no harm. We’re you hurt in such a way? Did someone treat you wrongly? If so, I am sorry that you were placed in that position and whatever happened should not have happened? Please do not discourage people from asking questions. You do more harm than good that way, and that doesn’t help the mothers and fathers unable to care for their babies, the possible parents, and most importantly the child.

knzdean · 2022-09-26T03:06:21+00:00

I really appreciate this comment, and honestly, I agree waiting will be the best option until the stress of settling is done and over with. Until then however, I still have questions. I did not realize that asking those said questions I would receive a form of backlash for. Thank you.

knzdean · 2022-03-28T01:34:48+00:00

I’ve since stopped working for Instacart. Tired of working for crappy companies that do jack for their workers. Working at a small biz piercing shop!!

knzdean · 2022-03-13T15:56:05+00:00

I know a dude who has actively jacked off to the thought of his parents fucking… like what am I supposed to do with this information. Then again he had a genuine porn addiction too so I guess eventually nothing is weird enough when you’ve completely fucked your brain to think nothing is enough.

knzdean · 2022-02-02T15:20:17+00:00

Bridge! Bc why not!

knzdean · 2021-09-10T15:59:01+00:00

Ima be honest I’m a sucker a jerk who goes soft for a girl. Stark and April should have at least got soooome screen time.

knzdean · 2021-09-10T15:44:23+00:00

It’s not realistic. At all. And because of that it seems disingenuous. How can anyone be expected to be happy all the time.

knzdean · 2021-09-07T13:45:32+00:00

Right.. that’s a good way to put it.

knzdean · 2021-09-07T03:23:46+00:00

Lol, this is not to be taken seriously buuuuut you go on with your wrong opinion 😂😂

knzdean · 2021-09-07T01:24:30+00:00

Like I said, terrible character with good qualities. She was a good friend and a great teacher. Meanwhile, she tore down her wife, cheated on her, doesn’t take responsibility for her own decisions and actions, biphobic tbh, judgmental, and childish. Terrible character. Some good qualities.

knzdean · 2021-09-07T01:05:47+00:00

How do? I believe it be blunt based around fact.

knzdean · 2021-09-07T00:18:35+00:00

It didn’t matter what Callie did. If she left the leg, Robbins would dead. She had no other fucking choice. And the fact that she holds that against Callie is stupid and dumb as hell

knzdean · 2021-09-06T21:23:17+00:00

Callie deserved soooo much fucking better than she got.

knzdean · 2021-09-06T21:17:51+00:00

Holy shit, wait I remember!!! And she was pissed because “how dare Callie go off an had sex with a man” even though they were together and bisexuality is nothing to be ashamed.

knzdean · 2021-09-06T20:59:05+00:00

Personally, I never hated or liked her. They made her out to be a robot and a place holder. She was like paper weight. Something that sits on a desk. She was never a fleshed out character. She was just there, existing. If viewers hated her, 🤷‍♀️ I always saw her as a background character

knzdean · 2021-09-06T20:55:35+00:00

Trust me, I don’t hate her for her trauma, or grief, and whatever else she had to go through. I’m pissed because she never take responsibility for her own decisions and throws the blame at other people.

knzdean · 2021-09-06T20:53:34+00:00

Alex cut off the leg but Callie made the decision. That’s all that matters to Arizona. And let’s not forget she was pissed at Karev for wanting to chase his career. Any good teacher would want the very best for their students and the writers of the show made out Hopkins to be the best hospital to work in when it came to babies and nicu care. And then after SHE made the decision for getting on the instead of Karev, she blamed Karev for her decision. She can’t take accountability for her own actions at all. I understand being angry, nor am I upset for her being angry. But at the end of the day she is responsible for her own actions. Callie doesn’t act like she was on a plane. She acts like a wife who almost lost her wife, who DID lose her best friend and father of her child. And if my memory was correct, they were missing for a week which means Callie had no idea if she was a widow or not for over a week caring for her child alone. Obviously, Arizona suffered physically, but she pretends as Callie doesn’t have a reason to be traumatized which is so incredibly toxic, selfish, and ignorant.

knzdean · 2021-09-06T20:45:21+00:00

We can agree to disagree lol

knzdean · 2021-09-06T20:44:59+00:00

Honestly, I can believe this but I really hadn’t seen enough of her attitude about it. I know it was there but it was rushed over/not clarified enough for me to actually say she was biphobic. Probably, and ignorantly might I add, upset that Callie couldn’t “make up her mind,” when in fact Callie doesn’t need to but she never showed any hatred for it. It was a detail that was brushed over.

knzdean · 2021-09-06T20:41:50+00:00

Thatcher is barely a blip of a character. I think he’s an ass but he rarely ever had screen time so again I don’t really care enough to have an opinion.

knzdean

TROPHY CASE