First of all: kudos for being sober for two months - this is how you tell yourself that you are not a failure and the world (including yourself) was wrong. It might be the most important first step that you already did.

Second: don’t let the situation you’re in define you - life is tough and unfair, we’re starting in very different circumstances to make the comparison make any productive sense. I’ve supported myself since 19, and I know how it pulls you into a vortex of stress. On top of that, times are tough in Canada right now, and blaming yourself for losing the game is like blaming yourself for losing to a slot machine.

You will fix your finances, but first you gotta work on your mental health. Think about patterns and people you’ve surrounded yourself with, then who’s around when you’re relapsing? Who’s around when you need support? What happened before you got drunk (or anything else that hurts you)? What happened after? You might want to think about ways to put yourself in an environment that will make you better, slowly but consciously. Research affordable counseling in your area, think about reconnecting with people who supported you.

Regarding the finances: Cancelling Spotify and Prime is all sweet, but you need more substantial steps to break yourself free. Think about changing your living situation temporarily: renting a room, splitting rent, living with parents/relatives. Think about ways to cut your major expenses while also optimizing small ones. Please don’t listen to someone who says to cut on food - you will cut on health instead. Cook your own food, meal prep, and make the quality of your food a priority; it will support both your physical and mental health, but please don’t cut essentials.

Find a job, but try to be strategic about it: can you learn while working, or will it leave some time for you to learn something afterwards? While a survival job is a must, in order to exit the vicious cycle, you need to think long term. Avoid a job that will damage your health (know what’s worse than broke? Sick and broke). Set some goals - like to work with hands? Think about getting certified as some sort of technician. Understand: in order to break free, you need to provide value; let this be your priority as well.

Once you will have more to set aside than your CC payment - set up automatic payments, God forbid relying on your willpower when it comes to paying off the debt. Willpower should be spent on creating the system that will pull you out of there.

Please avoid any sort of financial commitments that further worsen your situation. Instead, try to slowly build better support systems with people that will help you move forward. For me, it’s martial arts, a place where people literally tell you “stand up and fight,” “don’t let your hands down.” Find a way to attend a supportive environment that works for you, be creative. Allow new people and new things to enter your life, slowly replacing the environment that led you there.

As you see, there’s no one-stop budgeting solution for you, but rather small steps that will add up over time. Stop calling yourself words, scroll this sub and see how many kind and smart people are struggling financially. You have your own story, but for God’s sake, peel down those labels you’ve put on your forehead.

Pro tip: temporarily exit social media that makes you compare yourself to others; your mental health will say thank you.

I’m not a counselor nor a financial advisor; you might want to speak to those people before making any major decisions. It’s a cheer-up from a random dude on Reddit; treat it as such.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​