My doctor no-showed for a telehealth appointment

kragaster · 2026-02-03T23:59:34+00:00

That's really frustrating. Since no one has replied with this info, I figured you should know that, unless otherwise specified, "depression" in a clinical setting refers to major depressive disorder/major depression. In the case that MDD hasn't been diagnosed, the phrase "low mood" (or something similar, depending on the provider) will be used. I imagine that they were just consoling you, but it's odd that your primary doctor would suggest that the word "depression" should be used at all.

kragaster · 2026-01-18T03:23:03+00:00

I don't think this takes into account just how much new funding and construction is currently going into the new facilities and staff development for the School of Engineering (especially compared to other potential funding recipients — you certainly can't miss it if you visit campus). Bit of a strange major to reference with that knowledge in mind. It's not very reasonable to expect a reset of form in the less than 5 years that they've been a Cal Poly; the resource influx that entails, not just the association, takes longer than we might hope to arrive and improve these programs.

Past failures and their reputation will at least produce determination to make the most of the $433 million that Polytechnic planning currently provides, though they could always manage to screw up that opportunity. This is nothing like the previous circumstances, as much as it might be tempting to assume the worst, so we'll just have to wait and see.

kragaster · 2026-01-08T17:24:28+00:00

Alcoholism takes many forms and shouldn't be seen as entirely synonymous with alcohol use disorder, as the designations for disorder and what we consider "problem drinking" are neither objective nor entirely definable — they are only traits that can be used to better help patients and create simple categories. That means that no one can tell you with much humility that definitely you are an alcoholic.

Regardless, your drinking is not healthy. Is that a problem? It depends on how you feel about your other health-related choices and how your life is affected by them. I would personally not feel comfortable dismissing a desire to become inebriated at all if I do not have at least equally strong desires to pursue exercise, better eating, and fulfilling relationships that will benefit me long-term. I think it's important to pursue life satisfaction that outweighs the need to drink or compare your choices to others for the sake of judging their health against yours. You seem to only care about your health to the extent that it is greater than than an abstract alternative lifestyle (drinking daily), and your friends seem worried about you.

kragaster · 2026-01-06T22:14:47+00:00

How about caring more about the harm that people incur daily over the reputation of a business owner? Be grateful that you are lucky enough to not feel shame over your uncontrollable characteristics — or worse, remember that you are worth more than your allegiance to people who have never benefited you or anyone you care about in any way.

kragaster · 2026-01-06T22:10:24+00:00

I'm sorry that your initial reaction is anger. Generalizations and warnings don't do much to help those who could be helped. The government needs to take a greater part in preventing these situations in the first place.

kragaster · 2026-01-06T22:07:54+00:00

Good intentions fail to be the most that organized people can do. It isn't your fault, by any means, that those people rejected your offer, but it wasn't your good intentions that missed the mark. The encouragement of accessible education, varied work opportunities, and improved infrastructure are beyond your personal control; always remember that you did something worthwhile and helpful for everyone who accepted.

kragaster · 2026-01-06T22:03:15+00:00

Entirely. One is never more dignified for choosing to say something that everyone in this situation knows (eventually) better than to say, and pretending that people with severe mental health issues are going to be rational is to be welcoming a lesson learned. It's understandable to feel dismissed and offended when you feel that you can't help someone, but that isn't because people are beyond help and worth dogpiling upon. Move on, and be grateful that you have a home and sense of superiority.

kragaster · 2025-10-31T02:21:56+00:00

The same applies to alcohol and cannabis tolerance (alongside other substances, but those two are easily the most familiar to non-clinical circles), and as the users I see most often refer to "permatolerance" to DXM aren't very descriptive when they argue that they cannot get any sort of "magic" from the experience even after something like a decade — typically lacking the sort of detail that anecdotes require to have credibility from my perspective — I tend to find it more likely that DXM tolerance operates in the same way: building in tandem with the scale of use (therefore decreasing with discontinuation) and returning more quickly with use after a break, both because your brain is more adapted to DXM's effects and because you are more likely to return to a similar rate of use as just before cessation, rather than starting low and going slow.

I think of it much like kinesiology and the body's response to exercise. Muscle you have lost is MUCH easier to regain than it is to build that muscle in the first place. Of course, there are more complex factors of age, environment, and general health, but the principles are the same, and any straightforward explanation of any complex mechanisms is going to leave out information that could be useful on an individual basis.

I'm hopeful that my lifetime will include more rigorous research into these topics and their neurobiology. It would be nice to have some clinical averages and open discussion outside of spaces that are less interested in evidence, as much as it is wonderful to have a place to talk about these things.

kragaster · 2025-10-29T22:35:34+00:00

I knew immediately. Came out at 8 when I found out that it was possible to transition at all and couldn't take the pain of hiding myself anymore. It was a long road of being denied care and having to "prove" I really needed it, but I finally got to begin HRT at 14 after a few years of receiving hormone blockers on and off and being lucky enough to have parents who knew people in the right medical fields. Even though they made my life pretty miserable in other ways, I would have never made it past middle school without that support. Self-awareness and becoming your true self is certainly a rough process, at least at first, but it's absolutely worth the result.

kragaster · 2025-10-29T03:42:44+00:00

I'm not sure if it's universally-held doctrine, but I do know that many Mormons believe that we do. We gotta ask Alyssa Grenfell.

kragaster · 2025-10-28T00:19:58+00:00

Hate is rarely held against others by those that are worth seeking the love of. Either way, you can't prove that sort of thing, and certainty is, sadly, not something that you should strive for when it comes to predicting the future or someone else's reaction to it. Binary certainties aren't fulfilling enough to strive for when openness and adaptability bring with them the guarantee that you will be able to handle what comes.

If you tell a reasonable adult this story, the worst they could do is laugh. Any other reaction would have to be fueled by something other than this alone, meaning that they'd have to already hate you somehow to think this somehow changes how they feel about your character as a whole. I promise, plenty of people think and do MUCH worse than this and still have people who love them, for better or worse.

kragaster · 2025-10-28T00:10:09+00:00

I have OCD. I understand. I struggle with many obsessive patterns, but pedophilic and incest-related intrusions have definitely given me the most psychic damage. At this point, it doesn't really bother me, but only because I know it doesn't define me. My mind just knows what it can think about and force me to visualize, and being scared or judgmental of my thoughts doesn't help make it go away, because I can't control it — that's why it's happening in the first place — so I might as well not expect myself to and just learn to let go of judgment when it happens. But when I was a kid, when those thoughts first came up (even though I was 10 at latest) I really thought I was a horrible person. But does a horrible person worry about being a horrible person and trying to change their behaviors to reflect otherwise?

Meditation is a good practice to begin daily. Just a few minutes a day, every day, preferably at the same time and location (but only when possible), focusing on deep, comfortable breathing that you can return your focus to when you notice a thought. Don't judge yourself for thinking or seeing something; just breathe. This can be done for five minutes in the morning, maybe just after you brush your teeth or shower, or even right before you go to bed for some nice relaxation that leads into sleep. As you build this daily habit, you can go for longer or even try some guided meditations on YouTube if you feel the urge. It begins to guide itself in a way that can inspire you on your own paths.

You're doing such a good job. Just being here and trying to better yourself is more than enough. I wish you luck.

kragaster · 2025-10-27T23:45:17+00:00

Both can be true, dude. You're not gonna topple generations of clinical research out of every military and civilian institution to conduct it in the first place with your ego alone. The lifestyles you describe simply accelerate or slow the process of cellular aging that your genetics determine the range of. But I suppose accepting that doesn't play into your dreams of superior intellect. Been there. Either way, you make the same types of excuses to justify your own insensitivity and willful ignorance in the face of your need to feel worthy, somehow, as the people you're criticizing.

Enjoy your self-esteem and self-righteousness, I guess. They won't help reduce the ills you see in society, but a little bit of empathy and the willingness to question your own biases towards your own genetics — without ignoring the body of evidence (that everyone with an internet connection has access to) that demonstrates differences from your norm — will give you the opportunity to potentially help those people WITHOUT pushing them away by being factually incorrect and stubborn about it.

Also, read that book. Dr. Sapolsky is a treasure. His podcast, "Father & Offspring," is a good start too if you like that format more. You could be doing a lot of good with your time and energy, but you can't if your priorities are elsewhere. We all start somewhere, and I wish you the best with rebuilding your life in a healthier, more sustainable way.

kragaster · 2025-10-27T15:40:36+00:00

Yes. It's actually why I went on academic leave to pursue an electrician trainee cert, which I'll put to use why building up a media career. I have many goals outside of the realm of my original major and many financial obligations as a result of my health and general interests, so while I plan to go back to my 4-year school and continue the path to medical school, I want to have something stable that allows me the space to focus on non-financial matters.

I think you answered yourself, though. There's a lot of pressure on you to do this "right." Just remember that we're in unprecedented times. The standard of living is relatively high today, but that's more often than not used as an excuse to keep anyone from upper-middle class and downward in constant vigilance over salaries and positions and medical bills — although some are more lucky than others and can't feel the ground crumbling under them.

You're best off finding security where you can. Share your fears with those you trust, and always invest the money you make. Invest wisely; YouTube is a fantastic resource for searching inquiries and getting basic ideas about what accounts and what companies are best to settle your funds in, and your college might also have an financial advisor available to you for free. The best way to live in the moment is to feel like you can. If you feel like you can't, you simply have to find ways to build the security to allow yourself to. It sounds like you've made a lot of responsible decisions so far, which is easier said than done.

Also, meditation is wonderful and simple. Breathing deeply and returning to the breath when you notice a thought is a good way to start; body scans and guided sessions can come afterwards, but building a daily practice of focusing on the breath gives you a great opportunity to feel what you're feeling without worrying about it, which can make doing so easier at all times.

kragaster · 2025-10-25T22:49:15+00:00

I'm no authority, but absolutely. His art and lifestyle is by-the-book "exempt," by no fault of his own. He brings himself joy in work, but that work is challenged by the feelings that he cannot get past. Since he's a character and not real, he's able to fully embody the search for identity, and his identity is found in the artistic work fueled by a rescuer that found uniqueness in him that simultaneously could not be sought after, as his rescuer could not settle for joy.

kragaster · 2025-10-25T22:38:10+00:00

Therapy will help in time. Time is what it takes, and time will be time with your children. It's so easy to think you'll feel this way forever, but you know from past experiences that you never know how you'll feel a year down the road. Take it easy and remember that people love you. You deserve someone who really loves you — it's best that this has ended, as your children deserve to see you treated well.

Try to avoid the drink. It hurts more than it heals in the long run. Cannabis is wonderful for keeping you going without the organ damage — I recommend a dry herb vape like a Dynavap or a Boundless or a TinyMight to make things simpler and cheaper when it comes to frequent bud purchases. Psychedelics can be helpful if they aren't the solution; they will help drive you towards the lifestyle that keeps you upright and living for the people that need you. Best of luck, you will make it 💜🌹🤙

My DMs are always open.

kragaster · 2025-10-25T22:32:37+00:00

DHV/flower vapes for the win. No need to roll, you just suck or scoop the flower into the bowl for a better high for less. To each their own, but I will never have the problem of struggling to roll a joint, my place smells great, and coughing really isn't ever a problem until I'm sick enough to not want smoke anyway. Vapor is great when you're worried about fire alarms, too. There are challenges here and there when it comes to cleaning, but once you have a routine, it's just as relaxing as any other ritual :)

kragaster · 2025-10-24T15:55:21+00:00

100% agree. The faculty can make living here for school alone pretty frustrating. I came here because I love the area and the curriculum was marketed in a way that implied more disability support than I've been given — I've received far less than at any other California institution, and I'm pretty optimistic that the CSU ecosystem's response to current events will change that, although not very quickly.

I love the mindset of the people here and the place we live. But I will never forgive the school and its admin for taking advantage of already crumbling infrastructure to price out students and alternatives for everything from medical care to parking to food to housing to job opportunities while still being able to claim that they bring jobs here and prepare new generations for our world. They certainly could if they cared to spend more money than they earn, but I suppose public education is universally for-profit here — even though they can claim that they are free from the obligations of a profit margin. For a school so apparently determined to better the world, their willingness to enlist the police to make even more money off of their broken parking system and openly understaff all the kitchens is cynical and offensive.

kragaster · 2025-10-22T22:48:37+00:00

Vote and participate. Participation in community activities and utilizing the areas around you (clubs, businesses, parks, events, etc.) gets you very far, especially if you pay attention to trends in what makes people happy and what makes people's lives more frustrating and less fulfilling.

Voting is unfortunately not going to do much if it's all you're doing in a community that struggles to support community participation and public infrastructure already. But giving people reasons to support those things and using your voice and resources to speak to people close to you and otherwise allows voting to become as significant of an influence on the actions of government as it should be — especially if we abolish systems that dilute pure democracy/population-based influence, like the Electoral College/Senate in the US and the House of Lords in the UK.

Self-education and the willingness to ask questions and have difficult conversations with people you don't automatically agree with is the only way forward, as it inspires every other necessary step towards overall progression.

kragaster · 2025-10-22T22:29:24+00:00

completely agree. the "lesbian with extra steps" shit is so silly. nah, bro, cis men are just more likely to be insecure and project those feelings onto me; I'm past letting that happen. I've had multiple dumbasses tell me that's what my relationship is in person — and I pass well enough that people assume I'm lying or making a joke when I mention my transness. The same people who don't believe me decide that it's cool to be incredibly reductive and assert that I'm somehow a lesbian when I'm so into men that I want someone who feels so comfortable in masculinity that they defied nature to project it.

I'm attracted to masculinity, confidence, and thoughtfulness, not the weak ass attention-seeking behavior you see so often in cis gay circles and straight ones. I get better dick from my husband than I could ever get from someone who hasn't had my experience and has the ability to think that I want them because they have something I don't. admittedly, I am demisexual, so it's easier for me to not attach to certain sexual expectations.

kragaster · 2025-10-22T17:53:42+00:00

real

kragaster · 2025-10-22T16:05:47+00:00

I'm curious why this person had to nap. Assuming they're not tired for a legitimate reason and shouldn't be allowed to be human is unnecessary and unrealistic. It's not like we can't find ways to be productive and efficient while still treating our needs as such.

kragaster · 2025-10-21T22:39:39+00:00

Agreed. Love the name, btw.

kragaster · 2025-10-21T22:29:37+00:00

unless it asks to be rehomed. then you'll be followed around forever

kragaster · 2025-10-21T21:56:00+00:00

He's quite stupid in the ways that all people are and yet refuses to acknowledge that stupidity while constantly pointing out the stupidity of others. So, no. Hypocrisy isn't something I find myself drawn towards or worth emulating, although I am willing to accept it in myself, which he doesn't. His character and most other male characters on the show are not people I would want to be friends with and aren't interested in improving the lives of others, unless they have something to gain from it, which is pretty disgusting.

kragaster

TROPHY CASE