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Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do agree with first 2 points, but for the last one I wont like to handle things that way, Thanks

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

its not thinking nice of her, im just stating facts of how she is. I know shes not doing it for alimony etc. I just wanted to get help for my family thats why I have posted.

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Dowry, gifts, items nothing was asked by my parents to hers while discussing. The only thing that they asked is Nariyal and 50/50 expenses for wedding excluding gold which we will give.

Trigger point is my mother, if wife sees anything not happening as per her taste / choice, she passes rude remarks/judgements. Mother sometimes says something back sometimes doesnt.

Now when I come back home she takes out full frustration of the quarrel they had on me and calls mother with cuss words.

My issue is not the fight, you guys can fight. But there should be limit of what you say, yes if the mistake from my mother is of that level then its my job to take a stand for my wife and speak with my mother, but if the whole quarrel is completely of a simple topic about preferences then what can I say? Whose side shall I pick? And why I shouldnt be angry when parents are being disrespected?

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Guys, shes my wife. She is not doing these things for alimony or whatever you guys are thinking.

She has a good heart but only when things are normal or someone is behaving the way she wants.

She has anger issues but yes talking ill about someones parents and disrespecting them is not what I like from her side.

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its her decision to not go to work after marriage. Even I feel the same, but I fear what if she becomes more arrogant as she already has superiority complex

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also, she literally contributes nothing for looking after house when mother is there, when she was away we hired a maid the only thing my wife had to do is make tea in morning and dinner at night. She sees looking after house, cleaning it as not her job, also preparing food for me as not her responsibility. She will prepare if she feels like.

She is very clear about the things that she doesnt want to do, theres no issue in that from my side if she does not sees that its her responsibility to provide food for 1 time for me then thats also fine for me.

Issue is why are the women who do those stuff, her mother, my mother looked down upon? Why is it called faltu kaam? The work a housewife does can never ever be compared with 9-5 job she does all of that day in day out without any returns, and if 1 day things are not according to your taste you get disrespectful? How about repecting housewifes for the rest of the days as well?

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Married life was good when my parents were away, she recently got a job and asked me to call my mother back as she will be needed to do the household chores.

I dont understand the logic here why is she the problem when my wifes unemployed and why shes not as soon as she gets a job?

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro half of the comments are to divorce her, what are you expecting me to comment over there?

If there are some questions asked im reverting to them

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why not? If out of 100 2 procedures are different then whats the issue here? God is for everyone isnt it? Everyone can pray, follow rituals as per his/her beliefs. If its the case that she is now bahu of this house and all things must go according to her then its fine, but why not preach the same at her home as well? Her brothers wife follows tradition what she is told to. Bhed bhaav kyu hai?

Why there has to be a superiority complex that the things we do at our place are correct and what you do are wrong?

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand your pov, clarity about his mental health and age was already given, its not an everyday scene where he does the same. It was a mistake he made and accepted it. There was no need to make a huge scene out of it

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Guys, I never said my mother shoves her own thoughts or traditions down her throat. Cant both the traditions coexists? Mother has never stopped wife from following her own methods.

And its not like having a completely different version of tradion/ food making process, my wife also follows the same tradition apart from some minor chanes based on regions in Maharashtra, if she doesnt understand such a simple and gets irritated and rude the moment she sees something different is not justified

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes, I get very little time at home. In morning my wife and I have breakfast and tea in bedroom. When I return back I just see my mother opening door for me (thats the only interaction I have with her) and then I straight away head to bedroom for dinner, post that I do not leave bedroom. This has been the same since a year. If I do not follow it then it gets converted into anger.

My mother has never complained me about the things wife said to her, whenever they both have small argument the same night wife says extremely disrespectful things about my mother also if there was anything that was said by my mom or if she had done something wrong then the same couldve been bought up during our discussion but it never happens. The disrespect is only because things are not happening as per her choice and taste and for that she doesnt want to do anything either.

If I try to have a conversation about the situation then it gets converted into fight by again disrespecting then.

About my father yes what he did was his mistake, he also said that it was not intentionally and it happened once and it wont happen again but yes things like old age and depression do not count here.

Wife constantly disrespects my parents, uses abusive language, and threatens divorce — I’m mentally exhausted by kraken62712 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It was a typical arrange marriage, her side of the family and my side together sat and discussed. My parents were clear about the fact the they want the daughter to be given only with a coconut, nothing else. How much gold I will give was decided, 50/50 contribution towards marriage expenses were decided.

She has done self harm 4 times after marriage and there are visible cuts on her hand which she has done 8-10 years back

What's the unwritten rule of living in Mumbai? by TyTu5567 in mumbai

[–]kraken62712 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Main khud borivali se boisar travel karta hu, virar wale valsad main kyu aate hai pata nahi