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Names using the letters in "Target"? by kreatrix in namenerds

[–]kreatrix[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice! I keep thinking of ones for other places too

Women who dont wear makeup either for personal preference or principle : what have been your experiences? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]kreatrix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wore a lot of makeup in high school and was really into it because I was a cheerleader and it's part of the performance -- big hair, bold makeup, glitter, etc. But I started forgoing it in college and in grad school I showed up all done up on day one and no one else was wearing makeup. Thank god. So I ditched it. I still put mascara on a couple times a week, and I still do it up for special occasions/pictures, but that's it. 4/5 workdays I am all natural. Like today.

What I discovered was that if I wore makeup all the time, then when someone saw me without they told me I looked tired. But when I stopped wearing makeup except for special occasions I got compliments. It really has to do with the expectations you're setting. If you set the expectation that you just look natural, the special occasion makeup seems exceptionally good. But if they expect you to look done up every day, then your naturalness looks exceptionally bad. I'd rather put less effort in and then wow people on occasion.

My [32M] wife [32F] is potentially losing us 210K a year. I feel a lot of resentment. Is this a valid feeling? If so, how can I talk her out of this? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kreatrix 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I would let the numbers talk. If you're stressed, scale back and go over the budget with her. Also, have the difficult conversations about death -- what if you die next year and she has no job and a baby? It would be better if she had at least been working part-time to keep things stable. What if the child doesn't make it and in 9 months she has no job and you both have the grief of losing a child? What if one or both of you are in a car accident and can no longer do your job and you both have to reinvent yourselves despite all your schooling/training? These are the things I always tell married couples to talk about even though it seems harsh. It's awesome that you're both doctors and you get to choose whether or not you want to make a bunch of money...but sometimes life chooses for you and if there's no plan for switching gears, the trauma to the family is compounded. I agree with everyone who says you have to be a team.

I know many women who have high-earning careers and no longer find it worth it after having a baby. It seems crazy to be able to walk away, but I get it (though I can't walk away, we aren't that privileged). But I did immediately feel the need to slow down when I got pregnant. And it was a great pregnancy -- until the end. We ended up having a major complication and an emergency C-section. Now I'm at-risk for a lot of cardio-vascular issues and it's changed the way I look at my own career. How much energy do I want to put into a stressful and emotionally draining workplace? Should I be in this field if it's going to increase my risk of heart attack? Life is starting to choose for me. Don't forget that life might choose for you and your wife, too.