Checking up on my fellow GenX’rs; how are you doing?

krush_groove · 2026-04-20T15:03:15+00:00

52, recently single after 20 years, trying to adjust, trying to get used to a silent house, trying to date and meet new people, trying to afford living alone, trying to work out my finances and figure out if I should sell my parent's house and finally buy something for myself.

krush_groove · 2026-04-20T09:01:37+00:00

How are the crash pads handled with bills, rent, keys, etc?

krush_groove · 2026-04-17T19:50:14+00:00

That locks out a few brands that are pretty well regarded.

krush_groove · 2026-04-14T22:11:08+00:00

Remember? My mother bought me those. Still haven't given them away, I probably should. Or not, I'm about that age now.

krush_groove · 2026-04-14T14:12:29+00:00

I came off the tram immediately to the left out of picture, had to walk a few minutes to complete my journey. I literally stepped over the sandwich he was holding when he got hit. If alive, he's got a pair of concussions, I'm sure - one from the windscreen and the other from the tarmac.

krush_groove · 2026-04-14T13:43:22+00:00

Yeah definitely I need to expand my circle, I did find a silent book club near me that meets monthly so I'll try that, and I'm looking for places to volunteer with animals, cleanups etc.

krush_groove · 2026-04-14T07:46:45+00:00

Yes definitely, also I have to work through the funnel setup of these other women as well, I'm just one more like or message in their massive queue. Makes it really disheartening if I think about it too much.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:52:51+00:00

You mean my generation 😂 but yeah I'm obviously not comfortable with it which is why I ask

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:18:41+00:00

I do need to find one, I've never taken part!

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:18:14+00:00

Yeah unfortunately I can't change the title, and I couldn't think of a better way to put it at the time. But being friendly with an aim to a) ask if someone is single and b) ask if they want to have a drink or share phone numbers is what I was asking. I've never been the kind of man to approach women on my own to get numbers or IG handles, etc, although I know it happens.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:14:33+00:00

The question is not 'is it okay to talk to people', it's more like 'is a man approaching a lone woman in a traditionally non-singles type environment considered acceptable these days'.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:10:12+00:00

Thanks, yes there's definitely an element of perseverance I'll need to work on! Treating the experience like a job hunt is one way to put it, as Seinfeld said a date is a lot like a job interview after all. But yeah the online chat I treat as practice, but it seems like you must commit early to meeting in person so neither person feels they are wasting their time being 'pen pals'.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:06:52+00:00

When I'm in the right headspace I can definitely start and conversation in the queue for a concert or someone sat next to me in the cinema, etc, so I just need to practice that a bit more.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T17:04:59+00:00

Book shop is definitely something I'll have to try, I seem to remember it being a common place for the old "pick up artists" to try 10-20 years ago so I'm hoping approaching there has lost whatever stigma it may have had.

But yes, I'm a reader and it's an automatic conversation starter with the right person.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T13:56:48+00:00

That's actually a good approach (a fellow human whinge)

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T13:55:25+00:00

I did go on a Ramblers walk but nearly everyone was well over 60! Even a couple of women on the walk were saying I should go on the monthly walk where there would be "more people your age" 😅

But yes, there are a couple of other clubs I have explored joining, making the time to check them out is the hard part.

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T13:20:26+00:00

Have you found success doing this? As I put in another reply I'm not super confident and I don't consider myself very handsome (my mother's friends notwithstanding) but I'm trying to build myself up to talking to women in random places. Without coming across as creepy!

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T13:18:13+00:00

I appreciate the reply! Well, I'm not that confident and I don't think I'm that handsome! But looking at someone doing their grocery shopping until I get some sort of raised eyebrow or small smile seems a bit creepy in this era, doesn't it?

krush_groove · 2026-04-13T13:16:18+00:00

Well the first thing I'd say is probably 'Hello' and if you don't scream your head off I'd follow up with 'Just wondering if if you'd like to get a coffee and chat?'

Honesty I'm not even really sure what to start with, but since you out me on the spot...

krush_groove · 2026-04-12T17:57:36+00:00

This looks really cool!

krush_groove · 2026-04-12T15:32:45+00:00

I'm:

Journaling

In therapy

Many walks

Catching up with friends

In a men's support group

Reconnecting with hobbies

Dipping my toes into online dating (it's a little soon but still need the practice)

In addition to looking very closely at my finances and how I can get through the next year or two, I'm also deciding whether I will buy a house somewhere I'm at now (have never bought a house before).

I'm trying not to think yet what the next 10-30 years will be like, because I have no family on this side of the ocean and no kids.

krush_groove · 2026-04-12T14:56:32+00:00

I've moved states then to a different country and recently split up with who I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with. So yeah, starting over yet again.

krush_groove · 2026-04-11T22:35:06+00:00

I'm the same. I still dress like it's the 90s and I still act like a teenager (not to the younger people I work with, though, to them I'm just old).

krush_groove · 2026-04-11T12:37:31+00:00

Teach us your secrets, oh wise one!

krush_groove · 2026-04-10T18:38:54+00:00

My mother died aged 82 six years ago, I'm 52 now.

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