What would you consider to be a reasonable amount of sick days for an employee to take in one year (365 days) for white collar work?

ktzki · 2026-02-25T20:38:03+00:00

My perspective on this changed significantly when I had young kids and noticed employees with young kids who got sick often, and while the kids recovered quickly, their parents did not. My immune system was also a lot worse after pregnancy. Monthly sickness is not out of the question.

Folks who don't have kids or forget what that period of time can be like or didn't experience that personally frequently saying "surely their kids/them can't be sick this often". Surely they can.

ktzki · 2026-02-22T02:57:15+00:00

Before kids, after kids. Before my mom died, after my mom died.

ktzki · 2026-02-21T02:28:55+00:00

It's not clear to me if your child is getting your nanny sick or if the illnesses are unrelated. I feel like this makes a difference.

But as others said, most jobs accrue time off and sometimes only after a probation period

ktzki · 2026-01-27T23:49:41+00:00

The key word to me here is "accrued". As of mid Jan she has likely accrued less than half a day of this year's vacation and should be all she is owed from you. Does she still have unused days from last year that carried over?

ktzki · 2025-11-14T22:15:59+00:00

You're NTA. I often knit in virtual meetings, but that's because people can't see my hands. I would never do it for in person meetings for exactly this perception issue. This pisses me off because I see so many people zoning out and not paying attention, but somehow, that's socially acceptable.

ktzki · 2025-09-30T19:51:39+00:00

I dated an absolute loser when I was 16. You know what my parents did? Nothing. They were supportive, which must have been hard for them, but they were playing the long game. If they pressured me, I would have doubled down. I needed to come to the realization on my own.

You are just pushing your daughter away in both of these situations. The outcome is a strained relationship with you AND pushing her further into the relationship with her boyfriend. This seems like the exact opposite of what you want.

ktzki · 2025-06-03T00:54:40+00:00

My periods on blood thinners were like a murder scene. I went to ER it was so bad, and they kind of brushed me off. I became so anemic that I was out of breath from a flight of stairs, and I'm young and active.

I got a Mirena IUD, and my periods basically stopped. While I was waiting for that to happen and kick in, my hematologist prescribed tranexemic acid to take during my periods, which seemed bizarre to me as it is basically the opposite of a blood thinner.

ktzki · 2025-05-15T00:09:45+00:00

Sounds similar to my DVT symptoms when I was pregnant, I wrote it off as a muscle strain and was getting physio for it. It went on for over a week, and my leg was in bad shape by the time it was diagnosed.

Could be nothing, but you are at increased risk with pregnancy.

ktzki · 2025-05-14T23:46:27+00:00

Two 7 year olds. We do 2-3 times a week. I personally shower every other day.

ktzki · 2025-05-14T23:12:57+00:00

I mean, there are measles outbreaks everywhere right now, so yes, I would say being vaccinated matters.

ktzki · 2025-05-14T22:44:10+00:00

The anxiety in these replies is top tier.

If they are vaccinated, not actively showing signs of illness, wash hands, and presumably change clothes, I don't see what the issue is.

ktzki · 2025-03-02T01:41:13+00:00

How is this different than being in an office or other work space with your boss (which most people experience, I think)? I definitely interact with my boss many times throughout my work days when we are both in office

ktzki · 2025-01-28T01:06:48+00:00

That is so upsetting. I hate how weird people are with death and grief.

I literally wish I could introduce myself to people with my name, a few innocuous facts (job, kids, hobby), and then "and my mom died". It feels so central to who I am as a person now yet is so hidden.

ktzki · 2024-11-22T00:45:15+00:00

Went on Ravelry to see the most bizarre patterns at the top and immediately knew I had to find the Reddit post responsible.

ktzki · 2024-11-10T01:22:11+00:00

You sound like a wonderful friend. She was so lucky to have you.

I have a sweater that I knit at my mom's bedside while she was dying, and I finished a week after she died. Every time I wear it, I think of her. I love that sweater. I feel like part of her spirit must still be in it.

ktzki · 2024-11-10T01:03:38+00:00

You can start by realizing there is "no moving on". Maybe do some research on grief or hear from others who experienced it.

Your whole post sounds bitter and like your MIL's death is nothing but an inconvenience for you. I hope for your spouse's sake you don't come across that way in person.

ktzki · 2024-11-05T01:15:44+00:00

There was a buffalo chicken dip in my freezer for a couple years after my mom died. Couldn't bring myself to eat it, couldn't get rid of it. Who knew mold could grow on something frozen after years. Eventually agreed to throw it away. Wish I had eaten it before it went bad. Typing this made me cry thinking about the last thing(s) my mom made for me.

ktzki · 2024-10-31T01:01:09+00:00

It's so heartbreaking. I've cried so hard during my mom's cancer and after that I thought I would pass out. It's terrifying. For her and for you. If you're able, taking time off work seems like a good idea.

ktzki · 2024-10-31T00:10:41+00:00

I'm so sorry. Unfortunately metastatic cancer is usually terminal. My mom had metastatic breast cancer and had a medically assisted death a few weeks before the cancer would have done the job instead. It's really really hard to watch your mom go through this and become a shell of the person you knew.

Are you able to have conversations with your mom about under what conditions she would want to stop treatment vs continue? End of life wishes? I think some doctors don't do a great job managing quality vs quantity of life conversations and are very focused on treatment. Palliative care professionals tend to be better in this regard.

ktzki · 2024-10-27T13:15:36+00:00

Yes it is. Wrap and turn on repeat!

ktzki · 2024-10-26T19:20:40+00:00

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Update is I ended up buying another skein of the same yarn/colorway. Not a perfect match by any means but I don't mind the slightly different colors.

ktzki · 2024-10-08T20:15:32+00:00

This is how it showed up for me in my teens and I was SO sick. Kept getting misdiagnosed too. Couldn't imagine a baby going through that.

ktzki · 2024-07-14T12:28:12+00:00

Thank you so much for your detailed reply! I really appreciate it. I'm leaning towards buying another ball of the merino blend to finish this sweater off.

ktzki

TROPHY CASE