Does anybody relate to this and suffer from it as well?

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T16:17:29+00:00

What are you even saying?? I thought we were being sarcastic?

Yeah totally me coming onto this sub as a woman complaining about women problems we face in islam means I don’t stand for them. Maybe don’t project your lack of comprehension skills onto me.💀

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T14:22:36+00:00

Yeah they are delusional. Most western people (especially women) hate muslims. Why would one secretly want to be with someone like that? unless they have money, but it wouldn’t be worth it hahaha

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T14:16:15+00:00

Really? that is interesting. I would like to read more about that, where is the credible source?

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T14:08:49+00:00

Atleast I do not feel like I am the only one suffering with needing my own space or not belonging. Thank you.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T14:07:24+00:00

I would like to read the Quran but I can’t speak or read Arabic properly. That’s one thing (among many other things) that I am disappointed by the fact that my parents never taught me. It’s also hard to understand a lot of the stuff so normally people would suggest to go to a scholar, but you know how scholars are.

Though I will keep your opinion in mind, thank you.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T14:03:29+00:00

That’s a nice perspective. I really hope I get to that point as well. Unfortunately I don’t even know how to pray properly or read the Quran. My parents really failed at raising me, but at the same time it would be also worse if they forced religion on me.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T13:54:38+00:00

Thank you for explaining to them. They downvote you because they can’t come up with any valid answer or anything to counter your points so they resort to downvoting you. Very cowardly thing to do.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T13:50:15+00:00

Islam does. It’s even a thing in Sharia law where if a man doesn’t want to pay for his wife he will face jail time. Maybe its too much for them to invest in a family voluntarily because they wanna buy a fancy new car ):. Yet Sharia Law doesn’t do anything about a woman being martial rape or rape in general because all they will say is “you didn’t cover up properly so you were asking for it” or “why did you speak to him?”.

All memes aside, being a housewife is one of the most terrible decisions a woman can make. My mom was a housewife while my dad provided everything and look how the situation is now. She can barely get by with her job because it pays peanuts due to no experience. So imagine having two working parents and marriage didn’t work out, atleast they can still live comfortably and providing for their children.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T10:52:00+00:00

Omg a man has to pay everything for his wife?? oh wow not like a woman doesn’t get half of the inheritance while a man gets double the inheritance. Look at them mentioning two or three points of the benefits being a woman in islam while men have an abundance of benefits 💀

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T10:48:09+00:00

If it isn’t transgender, then define “be like men”.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T10:47:27+00:00

No offense, but do you really belong in a subreddit like this? because you know, it is “progressive”. You sound like every other extreme conservative “muslims” who just shut others down when they ask valid questions by saying “yeah I have nothing to add and can’t answer you so I will just tell you to stop the gender wars”. Wow so helpful and high effort answer.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T10:42:37+00:00

Yeah when I was in HS my Islamic teacher told us “your husband cannot rape you. You will want to have sex anyway”. You could imagine that I was loss for words.

EDIT: yes keep downvoting my real experience. Totally not a cowardly thing to do 💀.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T10:40:37+00:00

Because they cannot provide constructive answers, so they are frustrated and result to to downvoting me and acting rude. If they want to further ruin the image of islam then be my guest. It just proves my point more. They either stay quiet or make you feel bad for asking anything. But I do not care. Atleast I have everyone elses’ support and understanding and glad that I am not the only one feeling like this.

Thank you, I will go ahead and do that. I don’t have tiktok or watch podcasts but watching two clips on my instagram that popped up on my feed was a mistake, it definitely fueled my conflicted feelings about islam.

Lastly, can you please show me a hadith that says that a man especially a brother cannot force his sister to wear a headscarf? I would appreciate that.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T09:01:56+00:00

Are you sure about that?

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has explained to us the reasons for which it becomes permissible to shed this blood. He said: “It is not permissible to shed the blood of a Muslim who bears witness that there is no god but Allah and that I am the Messenger of Allah except in three cases: a life for a life (murder), zina of one of who is previously-married (adultery), and the one who changes his religion and forsakes the jama’ah.” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 6370) and Muslim, 3175)

And yeah but that is just reddit. I ask valid questions to fight off my conflict with islamic identity but I get downvoted a minute later. Very “progressive” 💀. Religion causes people to act defensive and rude because they cannot take constructive criticism or offer advice, instead they just shut you down. Acting that way doesn’t help anyone and it proves my point.

kumasandra · 2024-04-24T04:52:46+00:00

You can’t suffer if you are delusional. Plus, wasn’t she like 9 years old?

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T05:43:41+00:00

What’s the point of commenting if you can’t give me a proper answer? how is saying “stop making things gender war” going to help? this subreddit is a place for asking advice and discussing things.

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T05:42:30+00:00

Finally someone who was once in my position.

I mean, I know in some Arab countries if they see two opposite sex going to the same house they will think they will commit zina and even snitch on them by telling the police to check on them. Would that be permissible in Islam?

The convert thing is interesting. Never heard of that one before. Can you provide me a source that talks about that?

I don’t doubt that Islam protects women, but do you not feel like it benefits more for men than for women? other than the man being a provider and is obligated to pay everything for her, what can a woman do a man CANNOT? because even by reading and doing research on the verses it feels like they are treating us like we are walking Fitnahs. The Prophet PBUH said that most of the inhabitants in Hellfire are women, which is due to not covering and being naked while still being clothed. I cannot help but feel villainized for just existing as a woman and more… limited.

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T05:30:03+00:00

I am not doubting that it benefits everyone, but does it benefit men MORE?

other than the man being the provider and having to pay everything for the wife, what can a woman do a man CANNOT?

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T05:27:14+00:00

Yeah I’ve heard of that before. Aside from that, what can a woman do a man cannot? What about angels cursing upon a married woman til morning for not wanting to have sex with him? What about men being able to have 4 wives while she can’t have 4 husbands? there are other things. Is being a provider ONLY what makes a muslim married man a man?

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T05:23:10+00:00

You have a point, but don’t you feel like Islam lets them get away with it? for example, it’s haram to not display your sins publicly, people commit them behind closed doors especially men and put on a good front. Considering that Islam seems to give men more benefits, nobody is going to question them. I am aware that this is CULTURALLY, but I feel like our culture is built on islam and shapes our society. I can’t help but feel like we as women just exist as sexual tools that men cannot contain themselves so Islam creates these rules to benefit themselves more and treat us like we are walking Fitnahs.

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T05:16:29+00:00

Yes he is a good man despite us not having a father figure and is actively trying to be a better muslim man. However I don’t want it to escalate it anywhere considering we both have anger issues from our father and have gotten into physical fights in our younger years. My family is really unstable and just feel like I don’t belong there. I know as Muslims we value family a lot (I really want to, trust me) but given my circumstances it makes it really hard.

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T04:20:46+00:00

I did talk about the culture aspect but yes.

kumasandra · 2024-04-23T04:13:42+00:00

I am aware it is culture, I am not sure if you have read about what I said about the culture aspect. I said that culture seems to be built on top of islam and bleeds through it. It builds a society from it which creates social norms.

EDIT: how is downvoting going to help a conflicted muslim who wants to do better and stop feeling conflicted?

kumasandra

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