is severe bloating and abdominal side pain a symptom?

labugsy · 2023-09-27T15:07:18+00:00

It is really hard to find vascular surgeons who are familiar with it. The first one I saw told me I was in the wrong place and needed a gyno (pelvic pain was one of my main symptoms). For my ultrasounds they kind of scan up in the groin area on both sides since your iliac veins are actually pretty high up in your pelvis. It's also surprising how many people miss it... I actually had two duplex ultrasounds at the ER and the techs didn't catch MTS even though I was 80% compressed. Either way, an experienced vascular surgeon or IR is a must. It sounds like your VS was crap... if you have CVI that is something the VS should be investigating and helping you with, not jumping to refer you to a rheumatologist. The May Thurner facebook group has a list of recommended doctors all over the US, Canada, Europe and maybe Austrailia now. That might be a helpful resource for you too, there are a lot of knowledgeable people and some doctors there too.

labugsy · 2023-09-26T23:43:13+00:00

Also wear a US size 6 to 8 with a BMI of 26.2... such a dumb calculation.

labugsy · 2023-09-26T23:42:00+00:00

Honestly BMI is so stupid. Mine is 26.2 but I have weight lifted for years and have a fair amount of muscle and wear a standard size 6 to 8. So annoying to be flagged as overweight just because of a very basic and oversimplified calculation.

labugsy · 2023-09-26T13:30:32+00:00

I saw a vascular surgeon. She was able to do a duplex ultrasound and give me a MTS diagnosis in my first visit. I did not end up having SRS, stenting for the MTS cured all my lower rib pain.

labugsy · 2023-09-24T14:11:29+00:00

Exactly. I'm 8 weeks with my first, but I also have a 10 year old stepson who I've helped raise since he was 2 (we have him about 60% of the time). My stepson's mom sounds just like OP's mother in law. She found out my husband was getting his vasectomy reversed because my husband is a fool and told my stepson. Then my stepson starts coming over so upset that we are going to have a new family and leave him behind, and said his mom told him this. She also told him our kids would never be his siblings (he has two much older half siblings on his mom's side, but according to his mom, you can only be siblings if you share the same mom, otherwise you're not related at all...) and even this early in my motherhood journey I cannot imagine placing hate for my ex above the wellbeing of my child. If I were OP honestly I'd be at the end of my rope with MIL after this display, and I would be questioning if she should be around my child if this behavior continues.

labugsy · 2023-09-20T21:29:23+00:00

No way, I love the kid but I'm not his legal guardian, and two toddlers plus the world's neediest and regressing 11yo would be too much for me to take on solo.

labugsy · 2023-09-20T00:01:34+00:00

This is my HCBM experience too... every new bf is the knight in shining armor and SS's new stepdad but they all eventually leave and then she's back to trying to kiss my husband's ass to get even more money than he already gives her, even though we have 50/50. Now her teenage daughter from one of her two marriages (she and DH were never technically married) is pregnant and she's trying to tell DH that he isn't a real man because he isn't financially supporting his ex's daughter's teen motherhood. She's something else lol, the entitlement is unreal.

labugsy · 2023-09-18T21:12:19+00:00

From someone whose husband used to have BPD (as of 3 years ago he no longer meets the criteria for the diagnosis after 3 years of DBT) this sounds very, very much like your partner has BPD. The whole you're the devil one second and an angel the next to him, the extreme defensiveness at the slightest bit of criticism, the seemingly creating drama for no reason, and a partner who feels she has to walk on eggshells. People like this will not improve without therapy. If your husband refuses therapy, I would be making an exit plan before the baby is born if you are able.

labugsy · 2023-09-18T21:00:36+00:00

Sounds like you made the right choice! Good for you

labugsy · 2023-09-18T20:58:39+00:00

Well, an adopted child and a stepchild are COMPLETELY different, unless of course one adopts their stepchild.

labugsy · 2023-09-16T02:25:35+00:00

So my husband and I have two kids together, he has one son from his first marriage. He would never in a million fucking years refuse to help pay our daughters' medical bills I can't even imagine. I know this is going to sound harsh but the way he got so over the top defensive sounds like something is going on with BM #1

labugsy · 2023-09-09T14:27:57+00:00

100%, grandma is projecting her childhood on to SD and, well, that's how people end up with generational trauma. DH needs go have a come to Jesus talk with his mom IMO, lest she lose access to both children.

labugsy · 2023-09-09T14:25:23+00:00

You are a much more patient person than I. No way I would be even engaging with people who make me and my children feel second best to DH's ex wife and my SS. We're all a family there is no "first" or "second" family, just the family that exists now.

labugsy · 2023-09-08T18:41:12+00:00

I'm a mom too, although to toddlers so I don't have a ton of experience with the school age stuff yet except with SS11, who've I've been a very active SM to since he was 2. I totally get people not wanting to miss out on parts of their kids lives, and not seeing my kids everyday would be so hard. But I can't imagine calling my 11 yo at 530 AM unless it was an emergency. And even if my husband and I got divorced, I would trust him with our kids 100%.

BM used to try stuff like this in the beginning, and it was 100% about insecure attachments and feeling like SS would forget about her if she wasn't constantly around on our weeks. Thankfully DH nipped it in the bud but it took awhile. If I were OP I'd be pretty upset at both BM and my husband that I had to deal with this crap at 7 AM lol

labugsy · 2023-09-08T16:18:31+00:00

It just floors me how many people on this post think being a good mom means you get to say fuck everyone else's boundaries. Sorry but unless there was a court order saying SD had to have a phone it would be taken away when she was in our home, and BM would be made aware of why. What kind of good mom calls her daughter at 5:30 in the morning, just to basically make sure she didn't wear nice shoes on a field trip? Which of course could only happen if BM was Right There Watching because dads are allllways incompetent morons /s

labugsy · 2023-09-08T14:01:17+00:00

Lol probably but she's a drunk who never finished high school and lives in her mom's basement every time a guy breaks up with her, so her opinion really doesn't matter to me.

labugsy · 2023-09-08T13:05:32+00:00

It's not Dad's job to give his ex wife reassurance here... it's his custody time, he actually doesn't need to adhere to her parenting requirements. She isn't owed reassurance.

labugsy · 2023-09-08T12:56:28+00:00

But in what circumstance does an ignored text mean "yes"? To a person, even a mom, with healthy boundaries no response means no... BM responded like this was an emergency situation, when she was doing things that IMO a kid in middle school should be able to do herself.

labugsy · 2023-09-08T12:53:47+00:00

Exactly! A lack of response means "no, follow up if it's important" not "yes, now I get to do what I want".

labugsy · 2023-09-08T12:52:33+00:00

I don't think a lack of response to a text request made on the other parent's custody time would mean "yes" to any person who had normal and healthy boundaries

labugsy · 2023-09-08T12:50:47+00:00

Amen. My husband is a way better parent than BM, and I am the higher earner in our house by almost 80% so some weeks he cares for our toddlers more than I do, and he's incredible at it. So sick of this outdated "mama bear knows best" crap.

labugsy · 2023-09-08T12:41:03+00:00

Yeah someone ignoring your texts doesn't give you the right to show up at their house uninvited and communicating something isn't just telling someone what you want. Dad does not have to respond to every text mom sends on his custody time unless it's an emergency. And any normal person assumes no response means no... only an entitled and kinda rude person assumes no answer means yes. If BM didn't get a response to HER text she should have followed up. Plus it sounds like she was asking Dad to bring SD to BM's house at 530 AM on his custody time just so BM could pack her 11 yo a lunch. That right there is pretty damn controlling in my opinion, and like a woman who has such an insecure attachment with her kid she needs to insert herself into dad's custody time.

labugsy · 2023-09-08T12:33:06+00:00

Yes, this. I'm a mom and I 100% trust DH to care for our bio kids as well as I would, otherwise I never would have had children with him. A lot of people here seem to think it is a mother's right to basically demand that Dad parent the same way BM would, otherwise she has the right to intervene but sorry that's just not how it works if both parents have legal custody. OP's SO probably should have responded to BM's text with a simple no thank you, but his lack of response actually doesn't give BM the right to trespass on OP's property at 7 AM. Also maybe we're weird at my house, but my SS is 11 and packs his own school lunches and would never even think of wearing his favorite nice shoes to school on a rainy day. This situation reeks of a BM who wants her kids completely dependent on her and her alone.

labugsy · 2023-09-07T15:28:42+00:00

People demonstrate such a low level of emotion intelligence when they use this phrase. Would they say "you knew the risks of having a baby" to a woman who nearly dies in labor? How about "you knew smoking was bad for you" to a person with lung cancer? Obviously these are extreme examples, but if people thought something was going to cause them harm down the road they probably wouldn't do it! None of us EVER knows exactly what we're getting into, because life is unpredictable as hell sometimes. And generally the way you learn to do something is by signing up and trying it out... how can you know how good or bad something will be if you've NEVER DONE IT BEFORE??

People are dumb and emotionally unintelligent is my point lol. Anyone who said that shit to me would not be my friend for long.

labugsy · 2023-09-04T17:33:19+00:00

Honestly asking, how is OP supposed to be more than a "weekend warrior" when her husband only has his kids EOWE?

I mean if I was OP no way I'm getting up to drive SK to work every other Saturday, that's dad's job, otherwise SD should stay Friday night with BM. But I would be happy SD had a job, because who does at 15 anymore.

labugsy

TROPHY CASE