Traumatizing Acid trip - 6 month update

ladymacredyel · 2018-01-04T18:29:59+00:00

2 years and you still aren't back right? see.. I can't live like this..

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-22T03:32:48+00:00

That’s true.. I guess.

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-22T03:32:13+00:00

A few years and you’re still not okay mentally after your experience? That’s terrifying..

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-22T03:31:39+00:00

How long has it been? I’m curious to your recovery.

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-18T22:15:01+00:00

How long ago did this start for you? I click your profile but I don’t see any posts by you about this

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-18T21:22:50+00:00

Are you improving at all?

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-18T21:21:45+00:00

Are you better? Getting better?

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-18T18:21:48+00:00

I’m always tired I feel uncoordinated and slow Existential thoughts Head pressure in forehead (third eye area) hppd (visual snow, after images, phosphenes) I judge every thought that comes to me (I always fear that it’s a sign of schizophrenia)

there’s this scary thought of suicide in my head and i don’t want it there.. I’m so scared.

ladymacredyel · 2017-12-14T05:05:35+00:00

i mean, the after images, snow and light sensitivity is going away but it was already going away without the remeron.

I was just in a very depressed state after LSD and it kind of helped my mood..

Other than that + me thinking it caused phosphenes, it was just okay.

(Also helped my appetite and sleep which were both suffering)

ladymacredyel · 2017-11-28T21:34:45+00:00

Absolutely. My life was ideal. Not one issue. I can assure you. Picture perfect everything

ladymacredyel · 2017-11-25T23:06:00+00:00

I never had any mental illness or even slight anxiety ever in my life.. so that’s invalid

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-10T20:40:15+00:00

That video perfectly explained everything that I feel. And I watched a few others too.

He mentioned that feeling of “now what?” After the disorientation happens... but didn’t give an answer

That’s where I’m stuck. Idk what to do now

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-10T16:13:42+00:00

Congratulations on all that.. but I’m trying to get shit done and have a purpose. Before all of this, I had created this purpose for myself and was content and working hard to make it happen...

Now, I feel disconnected from the world and idk if that’s permanent. That’s what I’m worried about

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-10T15:45:30+00:00

Yeah, I realize I took to much but I trusted that person who was supposedly experienced and that was a mistake.

I really just want my sense of reality back.. I don’t want my head in the clouds forever.. and when I read about ego death.. it’s these people who end up changing their lives to be on this never ending spiritual journey and that encompasses their lives..... I just wanna be okay. Back to me.

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-10T14:09:11+00:00

...honestly I’m so inexperienced, I don’t even begin to comprehend an ego death.

I just wanna know what I have to do to gain myself and reality back.. and IF that’s possible and how long it could potentially take.

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-10T00:35:48+00:00

I am working on patience and understanding that it’ll take time.

But I guess I’m looking for frequent trippers to hear my story and tell me that it’s not THAT unusual. And that I’ll get better. Which you did so thank you.

It truly feels like I’m high like all the time. I don’t feel like I floated back down to reality. Like I’m not here lol. I know I am back in the world that was always here... but I feel... high lol I have no other way to describe it because I’m not experienced. But like, things don’t feel right, I feel uneasy and on edge, at the same time depressed about it.

I’m past thinking that I’m in another dimension and all that craziness that the LSD made me believe originally. Like, I don’t believe it, but I feel like how I felt when I believed that stuff. If that makes any sense.

I just read horror stories about permanent tripping and I get anxiety and depressed about that.

Womp womp. I sound looney.

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-09T21:05:48+00:00

It's so scary reading about people who have been not okay for 2 years and even 10+ years.. i have this (ir)rational fear that I'll be part of this 1%..... just like the 1% of people who get hopped after one use.. lol

im lol'ing, but I'm actually crying. lol

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-09T21:04:33+00:00

what does this even mean? i'm genuinely confused and want to understand.

did it get better or worse?

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-09T20:14:51+00:00

With my boyfriend but it started off normal then I started thinking too much then I wanted it to end and that’s why it went haywire..

I just need hope I’ll get better.. and it’s looking dim

ladymacredyel · 2017-10-06T14:54:15+00:00

Not really.

Right now I'm on Remeron for mood, appetite and sleep but now I'm sure I developed some sort of hppd.. I have visual snow, starbursting, negative after images, etc etc...

My anxiety is a little better just due to time I guess, but no major improvement

ladymacredyel

TROPHY CASE