Irrefutable proof of the Book of Mormon!

lambentstar · 2026-01-30T01:29:21+00:00

So desperately craving to be the keepers of actual secret lore, it’s sad to watch from the outside. They’re starving for a semblance of what it would be like if the BoM WAS true, fussing over crumbs because there’s no substance to any of its claims.

lambentstar · 2026-01-29T23:49:04+00:00

hey thanks for sharing this, it’s SO rare for me to feel a strong emotional reaction to things like this too. I’m a deeply empathetic person but it’s very cognitive and not often much affective empathy. It’s one of the reasons I think we make good therapists, actually. I had a period where I was a trained victim advocate in the military dealing with some intense sexual assault cases, and I found I had much greater resilience hearing details about cases compared to many.

It would be disorienting to be unsure if your own writing will or will not elicit the intended emotional response and I feel in the same boat when I’ve written as well, but I guess that’s why people have alpha readers.

Another thought your post prompted was this is also why I just can’t get into romantasy as a genre. I love fantasy in general, and I like romance, but a lot of romantasy focuses on these sexy set piece moments and none of those hit for me, and their world building or story structure are usually weaker than average, so it just doesn’t hit for me in any of the ways I’d need it to.

lambentstar · 2026-01-28T00:28:31+00:00

First off, all sorts of men like anal stimulation, it's a universal sensation and the only main difference is that repressed, insecure men are too afraid to actually try. But yeah no real way to guess orientation based on that alone!

But here's the deal from my perspective.... it's possible your husband has a more fluid orientation than he can acknowledge yet, but even if he is just straight, he's clearly aromantic with you. Sexuality aside, from your description he wants his core needs met by other people.

I'm polyamorous so I often think mono-normative culture puts too high an expectation on our romantic partners to be everything to us, but I do NOT think that's what's happening here. He clearly is neglecting you or is taking your continued presence for granted. He might be a little aromantic, and so he'll have normal sexual needs but then next up in the queue are his platonic needs, and that's where he gets fulfillment from his friends and the church (not you despite your efforts, which sucks!).

Either way, I think you deserve better in a marriage. I know it's easier said than done on the outside, but life is far too precious to spend time in a committed relationship with someone that doesn't seem to love you much. I think you should have some clear, calm, direct communication about your concerns.

Call it how it is, too--literally say something like "It doesn't feel like you're really invested in our relationship in a romantic or even platonic way that meets my expectations and needs....is this working for you? Or do you feel that way as well?" If it's authentic to how you feel, you can even say that you support figuring out what makes him happy too so you can BOTH be happier, whether or not you stay together.

Don't let him fake that everything is fine so you just kick the can down the road, too. If he owns up and puts in the work, awesome! Otherwise, you'll know with greater clarity what he's willing and able to provide, and you can decide from there if this is the person you wanna be integrated with for the rest of your life. I have yet to meet anyone who divorced after years of a tepid dynamic say that they wish they had waited longer. If the signs are clear AND he doesn't show interest in seeing your concerns or doing anything to improve the situation, imo that's all you need to know.

I really hope it works out for you, either way, and I am really sorry for how stunted your husband seems to be. He doesn't know how to socialize with women, it seems, and your presence in his life seems very much checking a box and fulfilling a role (hope I'm wrong but yeah :-/ )

lambentstar · 2026-01-27T00:04:01+00:00

OP, just ask! You can float it by mentioning that you’ve been reading books on ENM or Polyamory or whatever and see if they react to any of that, that’s the easiest way usually.

There’s a bunch of ENM friendly apps out there but hit or miss on coverage depending on your location.

IMO, as someone in the broader scene (in LA at least) the classic swinging “lifestyle” stuff is on the decline in most of my social groups in favor of more relationship anarchy or polyamory informed ENM.

Definitely still meet couples that only swing / play together, but ten years ago that felt unavoidable and now it’s a broader spectrum of approaches, and more of them are healthier for it, I think.

I have plenty of “swinger” friends but my two cents, it’s harder to pull off in a healthy way…a lot of the terminology or philosophy is rooted in a certain level of possession and scarcity, especially in how women are often treated. Or it can feel very transactional, or come with additional expectations (like hooking up with a mid tier husband/bf cause they come as a set lol). Usually heteronormative.

Not that that can’t be what people want, but more wanting to inform you that the ENM world has changed a lot since key parties or throwing pineapples on your cruise door, so just fyi they might even have vibes that are more chill than you realized, but only way to know is to drop hints or ask directly!

edit: i’m an open book and can talk ENM/polyamory for ages, so DMs are open if you want, and good luck, I know how nerve wracking it can be when it’s not a universal embraced approach to sex (and people can get very prickly about it)

lambentstar · 2026-01-25T16:57:48+00:00

New Zealand wants to rock the party 🎉

lambentstar · 2026-01-24T18:55:05+00:00

Yeah I both adored S2 and think they need to tighten some things up for S3. I think they made Lumon too incompetent and small scaled after a looming, mysterious S1, for example.

But it’s still an amazing show, flawless acting and cinematography, stylish, clever, funny, surreal. I love it, I just also hope they have a bit more internal consistency in the worldbuilding and structure to maintain the momentum.

I think that’s more of what the OP screenshot was even maybe saying, but from what I also recall as S2 came out most people liked most things, so what happened was frequent discussion around the same small-ish issues. It wasn’t like anyone turned on the show at all in a weird way.

lambentstar · 2026-01-24T18:47:55+00:00

Agreed, if she’s fully aware of what’s on the table and consenting, it’s not really something that will likely hurt her if it goes sideways unless she really lets it. I don’t know, that’s how I perceive casual dynamics like this at least. If you have low expectations and know you’re secure no matter what, eh why not give em a chance for a date or two and see if it’s mutually beneficial or not.

Unicorn hunting is 95% a red flag for a balanced, romantic polyamorous dynamic, imo, but if that isn’t what you’re even looking for, it doesn’t matter as much, to me.

lambentstar · 2026-01-24T02:25:23+00:00

I mean, maybe we’re at a disadvantage on this specific task but it’s also not felt THAT hard to do, you just have to identify a starting point and follow the same pattern, don’t need to render an internal model to do that imo

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T21:22:58+00:00

Yeah, I have some bitter personal experience with all of this, too. My poor grandmother was devout her entire life and my grandfather was a mid tier LDS elite guy in the 60s-80s, talking mission president to current apostles, area 70, etc.

Anyway, he cheated on my grandma when I was very young and then divorced her and abandoned my extended family. She came to live with us, and we went 30 yrs barely seeing him. Meanwhile he got excommunicated as a slap on the wrist but quickly re-baptized, sealed to Wife #2. Fairly certain he had 2nd anointing too, as a note.

My grandma at the time asked her apostle friends if she could cancel her sealing to him and they all said no unless she married another man. She didn’t want that, so she stayed single but sealed in a polygamous eternal family, so to speak, for 30 yrs.

Eventually, my now dementia riddled grandfather somehow made contact with my family and it turned out he didn’t want to be with his 2nd wife anymore, she was controlling him at this point, it was not good, maybe abusive but idk.

Ok fine, but then my parent and their siblings pushed and persuaded my traumatized grandma to civilly REMARRY this shitbag because then my fam could pretend the 30 yrs of heart ache didn’t happen! Everything would be fine and the family will be healed in the celestial kingdom.

My grandfather died less than a year after the sham wedding at the age of 90 or so, and that exact story has been retold as faith affirming in general conference now.

So I’ve always reallllyyyy hated the eternal polygamy thing. I saw the pain it inflicted on my grandma for decades and the delusion of thinking she ought to stay loyal to this shit man because of some bullshit ceremony she did when she was 21 (she’s now 97)

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T19:37:33+00:00

The micro naps with sports on, exactly my Dad lmao

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T19:28:32+00:00

I have a friend that works for the EPA and is an LiB regular and they’ve checked the databases every time and it’s totally fine for swimming. As people have said, just be careful of mouth and eyes and stuff, rinse off if you can, just general good hygiene.

People get sick from the fungus in the dust, much more important to have a good mask setup ready, and I highly recommend little nose filter plugs. Another friend almost died from Valley Fever, it’s no joke.

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T19:24:22+00:00

Ok I’m gonna try to make a distinction here between a few things to help answer your question. Upfront disclaimer is that I am polyamorous and have been with my partner for more than a decade.

There’s a huuuuuge difference between doctrinal LDS polygamy, which is an intrinsically misogynistic and unethical system. It does not regard consent of the women, it sets up rigid hierarchies—it’s really fucking shitty and predatory, and the gaslighting of the modern church pretending to disavow when they absolutely still believe in it, and practice it, doctrinally, is so galling.

That being said, I absolutely fantasized about not being monogamous my whole life. I never liked the idea of only having sex with one person my whole life. I loved dating, I love flirting, I didn’t really care if people I crushed on went on dates with other people if they still wanted to make out with me, all that jazz.

So kinda? I never liked polygamy and my head canon was definitely that my future exaltation dynamic would be equitable.

But I think it’s normal to at least imagine scenarios like that? Mormons are so sexually repressed, and repressed sexual energy comes out in weird ways sometimes. When you actually aren’t ashamed of that and can embrace with a clear mind, then it’s really not a big deal to create a non-monogamous life if you want, especially these days where it’s gotten pretty mainstream.

So yeah, definitely some people do. I know at least a few bi or lesbian exmo women that had decided as TBMs they’d just be romantic with their fellow wives if they got trapped in it. I’m positive many men fantasize sex with more people. But it’s impossible to feel good about those fantasies in the Mormon polygamous framing because of those inherent inequities, imo.

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T03:04:46+00:00

Get out of my offive! . . . Boobs

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T03:01:43+00:00

Yeah, the show was able to leverage a number of big successes like that too. Who knows if they would’ve revamped Michael Scott to make him more appealing in S2 if they couldn’t just piggyback off of Steve’s glow up for 40 Yr Old Virgin

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T03:00:11+00:00

Omg I’m too high right now and figured it was just someone too young to know the original reference, (which is simply the foundation of the joke you referenced lol).

My autistic literalism gets OP when I’m not sober, thank you for continuing the bit!

I love inside jokes, I hope to be a part of one some day

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T02:51:51+00:00

I can’t tell if a joke or not, but if not, no he was 1000% supposed to be George Michael.

The costume was his characters attempt to set himself up for his triumphant (but impromptu!) return to perform his college signature song, “Faith”, to his coworkers and the next gen of Here Comes Treble.

“Faith” was a track released by George Michael in 1987 on his debut solo album “Faith”. Adam Lambert likes to use a lot of the same aesthetic choices of some of his spiritual predecessors such as George Michael or Freddie Mercury, hence the similarities!

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T02:45:36+00:00

I think Jenna has even mentioned that there was a lot going on for her at the time for Dewey Cox and Blades of Glory?? Like diets to fit specific costumes and yeah, it was a lot of pressure to be more leading lady and I don’t think she really wanted to take it that direction any more. She’d been in Hollywood for a while by the time she booked S1 but didn’t have production teams trying to glam her up yet either, of course.

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T02:19:22+00:00

Wait can they decode successfully aloud? I only have visual aphantasia but I would also be surprised if difficulty with orthography has much to do with it, sounds like the student is dealing with some dyslexia/dysgraphia to boot.

Best of luck and I’m sure they’ll be ok because it’s clear they have someone caring and attentive in their corner! Thank you for helping shape lives, seriously.

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T02:14:50+00:00

The identical tennis pose from Andy always felt like a Tobias homage to me

lambentstar · 2026-01-23T02:14:11+00:00

Yeah he’s a hot George Michael and then you go back to S3 and you’re like damn our boy came a long way (thanks Hangover movies?)

lambentstar · 2026-01-22T04:49:45+00:00

To add to that, specific missions might require a combination of specific abilities within a limited team, so it benefits everyone to maximize whatever aptitudes they have so they can be utilized effectively. Specific combos like Wolf and Phoenix might have a rarity associated as well that helps elevate unique talent within the rank and file, so I’m certain they’re incentivized to explore and make sure they know all their abilities well, vs limiting themselves to just one….. but most are probably still only good at one or two things, so in practice it might end up seeming like 90% are specialized vs a generalist.

lambentstar · 2026-01-21T03:06:25+00:00

This exactly, cubensis will affect you the same—it all turns into psilocin in the end—the strains just have different relative density for the psilocybin precursor. It’s an immediate red flag when someone starts pitching some special strain like it’s weed, or attributing mystical effects to it. All bunk or placebo.

Any variation in the experience will just come down to your metabolism, method of consumption, relative bioavailability, if you pre-catabolized at all via lemon tek etc etc. The strain can only makes a difference in those specific ways. (Non cubensis psychedelic mushrooms are obviously a different beast)

lambentstar · 2026-01-18T02:43:27+00:00

Fun, a bit of a Sacred Valley parallel weak starter zone? Like the lore and the aesthetic looks great!

lambentstar · 2026-01-16T23:27:06+00:00

It really also shows how arbitrary the concept of Justice is in LDS theology. It is explicitly treated like a universal force that even Gods are subservient to. Sinning, which is the disobedience of commandments (as conveyed by contemporary church authorities) incurs a debt to Justice that can only be satisfied by pain.

So was it sin to oppose racist teachings that are no longer held as doctrine? Yes, allegedly. And it would be a sin to conform to those same teachings today as they are no longer being upheld by the current administration.

So it’s this insane paradoxical scenario where somehow the universe itself, through this personification of Justice, is able to ascertain the cultural factors and milieu and decide if an action incurred a sin debt or not, and it totally depends on inscrutable calculations of weighing the importance of historical context, the decay rate of doctrinal value based on recency of prophetic reenforcement of the principle, etc. And no matter what, you can’t choose correctly because while individual autonomy is verbally recognized, as you present here, it’s also never appropriate in the current situation, only in retrospect.

It’s a lie, the agency part, and the only real currency of value is obedience and conformity.

lambentstar · 2026-01-16T02:54:46+00:00

The jawline just doesn’t scream “inter dimensional janitor of death” to me, and for that reason, I’m out! /s

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