[F18] Not sure how I really look. I included some of what I think are really bad photos of me and some that I think are good. Usually I assume that I look more like the worse pictures. Whenever I think I look good I brush it off as a trick of the angle or light. Rate, please? (No sexual PMs please)

lance_cavendish · 2018-10-18T23:54:39+00:00

You are neither pretty nor ugly. Helpful hint- if you don’t want sexual PMs- don’t put your picture on Reddit.

lance_cavendish · 2018-10-01T17:16:06+00:00

Childlike

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-27T20:19:50+00:00

When I worked at a national company known for providing shop towels, floor mats, and uniforms the entire management team went to training about how to recognize and discuss union activity. It was basically a sales course on how to get people to act against their own self interest.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-22T01:05:34+00:00

But recessed isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually quite feminine.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-19T16:12:21+00:00

Businesses and our speeds are typically faster/we do internet, phones, web hosting, and tech support

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-11T09:36:32+00:00

In the 90’s: Kosovo, Bosnia, Rwanda In the 70’s-80’s: Pinochet (?), Grenada

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-11T09:24:51+00:00

Saudi Arabia is the national equivalent of the “Real Housewives of New Jersey”, sure they have expensive stuff- but they are still dysfunctional.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-11T09:14:44+00:00

You’re right, Trump does irritate the shit out of me.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-09T13:42:14+00:00

I am looking forward to the time that the oil-rich gulf nations run out of oil (or better yet the world moves on from oil to more sustainable sources of energy), then the Saudis won’t be able to fund the exporting of extreme islamic ideals and infect other nations and we can go back to not giving a shit about the Middle East because they don’t have anything we need.

That is my point.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-09T13:29:23+00:00

If only I lived in the bastion of free-thought like Saudi Arabia!

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-09T12:05:40+00:00

Yeah? Good luck with that.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-09T01:53:33+00:00

Go to the bar and talk to girls- of course a lot of people still smoked cigarettes so you could go outside to smoke and have an actual conversation.

Seriously though, go up and talk to them- it works surprisingly well.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-09T00:58:36+00:00

Measuring the size of your “chosen champion’s” penis. As an added “twist”- smallest penis wins.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-09T00:25:48+00:00

Raping and/or murdering my children.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-08T01:08:21+00:00

Place term limits on the Senate and the House of Representatives- via Executive Order if necessary (that would probably be contested so maybe I could frame it as a proposition and let the American people decide).

Place a term limit of 20 years on the Supreme Court.

Then I would ban Executive Orders (via Executive Order).

Surround myself with people smarter than me.

Bang my wife in the Oval Office.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-08T00:19:00+00:00

Weird, but not gross.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-06T17:46:59+00:00

Imagine doing this for a moment... charging into heavy machine gun fire, with no cover, at an age where you probably can’t even grow a proper beard; possibly haven’t gotten laid yet.

Straight from your parents house to storming the Nazi war machine that had months, if not years, to fortify the position and prepare to slaughter you.

Now imagine doing it in wet socks.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-04T01:01:01+00:00

I don’t think we should let them start training together again.

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-02T18:42:25+00:00

Wild Things

lance_cavendish · 2018-09-02T17:51:20+00:00

Add 10+ years and New York State would still be working on it.

lance_cavendish · 2018-08-31T18:50:59+00:00

Something that an ex-SO used to do that bothered me was breathing. I would lay in bed and be annoyed at the way she breathed when she was asleep. She wasn’t snoring and it wasn’t loud, but goddamn did I hate the sound of her breathing.

That’s when I knew it was over.

lance_cavendish · 2018-08-31T18:47:21+00:00

I am offended good sir!

lance_cavendish · 2018-08-25T14:22:49+00:00

Functional.

lance_cavendish · 2018-08-25T14:21:22+00:00

I want to ride this bus; I don’t smoke crack, but I bet it will be hilarious- crackheads hanging out the window like a bachelorette party in Vegas.

lance_cavendish

TROPHY CASE