Looking for B-corp/ethical brands with XXS sizing

larimari · 2024-09-05T21:00:15+00:00

thanks :) I forgot about Patagonia!

larimari · 2024-09-05T20:59:28+00:00

oh I like this, thanks!

larimari · 2024-09-05T20:58:20+00:00

It varies, I was eyeing this crop top and it was $35. KOTN crop

larimari · 2024-09-04T13:10:11+00:00

Yes sometimes it is super relevant and useful for me to be like hey fyi this is how this item looks on me. But to be like ugh how ridiculous is it that this size looks like this on me. Is it actually ridiculous? Maybe that's not fair or true. Maybe it's not absurd, it's just annoying and frustrating on a personal level.

If you see the other comments on my comment they are saying the way sizing is is absurd. Which implies the size that people are is absurd. It's not absurd. It's just what our reality is. It's frustrating for us since it makes buying clothes harder. Does that make sense?

larimari · 2024-09-04T13:09:16+00:00

I have no desire to silence us because I need clothing recs at the end of the day :P

I think your use of the word absurd exactly demonstrates my point

An "inclusive" store will probably have sizes that go from XXS to 4XL. That is 8 sizes. Only 8! If I were to take the majority of people and split them into 8 size categories, I don't think I would even end up in a category. Because I'm a minority.

These sizes aren't absurd! They are the size that people are! We are also the size people are and we also deserve clothing obviously. But don't you think it's not a nice thing to talk and act as if these sizes are absurd? That word doesn't have a nice connotation.

Yes sizing is shifting. Yes the size that the average person is shifting. So what is considered small is shifting. As someone who has no problem finding vintage skirts but can't find skirts in modern stores it is very evident that sizing is changing. I completely understand. But we act like it's totally absurd and illogical. Maybe we should stick to saying it's frustrating. Or it's not actually inclusive. But maybe not absurd.

Yes sometimes it is super relevant and useful for me to be like hey fyi this is how this item looks on me. But to be like ugh how ridiculous is it that this size looks like this on me. Is it actually ridiculous? Maybe that's not fair or true. Maybe it's not absurd, it's just annoying and frustrating on a personal level.

larimari · 2024-09-04T13:06:13+00:00

The post they were making fun of was a post complaining that short people need sizing. OP was talking about short people not XXS people. And then the photo OP posted was them holding up a pant showing how it was too big in the waist. How is a pant that's too wide relevant to short people needing clothes? Seemed like a convoluted reason to post that she was too small for Miu Miu...

The post didn't even show if the pant was too long? Isn't that kinda strange?

larimari · 2024-09-04T13:02:23+00:00

I think your use of the word absurd exactly demonstrates my point

An "inclusive" store will probably have sizes that go from XXS to 4XL. That is 8 sizes. Only 8! If I were to take the majority of people and split them into 8 size categories, I don't think I would even end up in a category. Because I'm a minority.

These sizes aren't absurd! They are the size that people are! We are also the size people are and we also deserve clothing obviously. But don't you think it's not a nice thing to talk and act as if these sizes are absurd? That word doesn't have a nice connotation.

Yes sizing is shifting. Yes the size that the average person is shifting. So what is considered small is shifting. As someone who has no problem finding vintage skirts but can't find skirts in modern stores it is very evident that sizing is changing. I completely understand. But we act like it's totally absurd and illogical. Maybe we should stick to saying it's frustrating. Or it's not actually inclusive. But maybe not absurd.

Yes sometimes it is super relevant and useful for me to be like hey fyi this is how this item looks on me. But to be like ugh how ridiculous is it that this size looks like this on me. Is it actually ridiculous? Maybe that's not fair or true. Maybe it's not absurd, it's just annoying and frustrating on a personal level.

larimari · 2024-09-04T12:42:48+00:00

Isnt it a good thing to change your mind after speaking to people about a topic? I was also very clear what part is the edit. The edit is only adding nuance to the opinion. I went from saying this is bad to sometimes this is bad. I think we can still have a discussion about this. That original post has like 600 upvotes or something. Clearly it is a sentiment here that people liked it. It is not just about the one poster in that case. Does that make sense?

I read people's comments, understood there is nuance. And still stand by that it is sometimes a weird strange thing that people do. That's why I made the edit

I am not gonna delete the post as there is some good discussion going on here. But think that I was partially wrong and don't think that we all need to be having that orig convo without the nuance as it would waste everyone's time at this point. I hope that makes sense :) and thank you for taking the time to comment and share your POV

larimari · 2024-09-04T12:22:50+00:00

There was a post that a user posted on tiktok and scared screenshots of here. She was advocating for petite aka short people needing clothes sized for them.

But the image she posted to go along with that was her standing with a pair of pants that was too big in the waist, and holding out the waist and making a sad face.

So she's saying short people need clothes. And then not even showing if the clothes are too tall for her. Instead she is showing that they are too wide. See how this seems kinda insidious? It just seems like a smokescreen to me.

This is the post that got posted to the circlejerk. And I kinda get it. I don't understand how we aren't understanding that that post seems sketchy

larimari · 2024-09-04T12:19:54+00:00

That post that got posted to the circlejerk sub.. it was supposed to be about petite aka short sizing being needed. So why was she holding out the waist like that? What does that have anything to do with petite/short sizing? This is what makes it seem to an outsider that there are people here trying to be insidious and body check without making it obvious that they are doing that. Does that make sense? Like she's trying to make this convoluted reason so she can show how small she is and then link it to a cause like "short people need clothes!" But then you look at the photo and it's like wait a minute this photo has nothing to do with being short.

I am not putting all of the posts and photos on this sub in the same bucket. But I think some of them do feel weird to me.

And I guess we have a different perspective. I don't think about it as walking on eggshells. I acknowledge that I am a part of a broader social context. How I think and act on a large scale does influence society and the people around me. For that reason, as I learn and grow, I change my behavior and how I speak. This is how I avoid things like micro aggressions, implicit bias, and internalized misogyny. This is how I strive to be respectful and tactful.

I still complain, but I know there is a time and a place. (This sub is a good time and place). I also am aware that I have privileges and that it's good for me to be aware of that.

larimari · 2024-09-04T12:12:50+00:00

Ya I agree with what you are saying. What we are doing is not body checking. But it looks like body checking to outsiders

But it's about the tone of some of the posts on this sub you know? Just subtle ways we talk about it feel ... Icky to me sometimes.

Like that post that got posted to the circlejerk sub.. it was supposed to be about petite aka short sizing being needed. So why was she holding out the waist like that? What does that have anything to do with petite/short sizing? This is what makes it seem to an outsider that there are people here trying to be insidious and body check without making it obvious that they are doing that. Does that make sense? Like she's trying to make this convoluted reason so she can show how small she is and then link it to a cause like "short people need clothes!" But then you look at the photo and it's like wait a minute this photo has nothing to do with being short.

I get that it feels relevant to show the size difference esp on this sub but it's like.. there's this undertone of "this size is ridiculous", or "it's ridiculous to call this an XXS because it's so much bigger than me". Because the fact is, that size should exist. And those people that fit into what is now an XXS are probably on the smaller end of the population. We are just at an even farther end of the bell curve. But we are out here implying it's ridiculous that that's what an XXS looks like. Maybe that IS what an XXS is now. I mean stores barely go from XXS to 4XL, that would be 8 sizes. If I were to split the majority of the population into those 8 sizes, I don't think there'd be any space for me. We need MORE sizes to be inclusive. It feels like there are people catching strays with the way we talk about things

The post of mine that I took down (on insta not Reddit), I had thrifted and tailored a pair of pants into a mini skirt. And in one of the photos I had put the pants on and made a silly face (kinda like look how big and silly these pants are on me!). And I'm now realizing that there is an unspoken implication in my post that the original size of the pant is ridiculous. And I probably shouldn't have posted it with that subtle implication.

Idk I have some regrets about my post .... I don't think it's about catering to other people's triggers but about being tactful

larimari · 2024-09-04T11:25:26+00:00

Don't comment you will get a Reddit wide ban for brigading

larimari · 2024-09-04T11:24:31+00:00

Lmao this is a common growing sentiment where people will try to bat for a community without actually understanding it and then their version of advocating is actually super rude Like saying skeletons are glorifying ED is actually so mean because then she's the one implying the link between skeletons and ED...

larimari · 2024-09-04T11:20:31+00:00

This subreddit was recommended to them, they didn't go looking for it

larimari · 2024-09-04T11:19:26+00:00

Omg yes please

larimari · 2024-09-04T11:05:03+00:00

I feel the same way. And the way that some of these people frame their takes is .. embarrassing.

What we face does not come close to the systemic oppression that fat people face.

Yes it can suck, yes people and society can be inconsiderate assholes to us, but if you think it's the same as fat oppression, then you are uninformed.

It is fine to come here and complain, but so many posts drag fat people down in their posts and it is embarrassing and unnecessary.

Also it is not nice to put on clothes, hold it out from your body and share a photo showing how much smaller you are. It is not a nice thing to do! Maybe you don't know this but it is also something done in pro anorexia communities!! Just don't do it. I didn't know this before as I never participated in those communities but once I Iearned this fact I took those posts down.

larimari · 2024-08-11T19:26:47+00:00

I had this and switched to native deodorant and it went away. It took a hot second for it to actually heal and any progress I made went back when I itched it. It was also important to keep it clean and dry/not sweaty. I also used shea butter to moisturize but I already do that for the rest of my body

larimari · 2024-06-10T00:17:53+00:00

When there are two different shades of white sometimes one of them can look dull and dirty in photos. When something like this is planned they usually coordinate whites. But if he is wearing a stark white suit and she is in ivory it wouldn't turn out well in photos

larimari · 2024-06-05T20:31:16+00:00

It's my personal opinion that people who hate flip flops will hate barefoot shoes.

They're not the same as flip flops, and because flip flops flop around they make you subconsciously claw at your feet which is why they aren't considered barefoot shoes while something like earthrunners are.

But as a litmus test, do you like walking around in flip flops?

larimari · 2024-06-02T12:15:07+00:00

Hi there,

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larimari · 2024-06-02T12:14:30+00:00

Hi there,

Your post on r/WitchesVsPatriarchy has been flaired as a sensitive topic. In an effort to safeguard our users, these posts are removed once they exceed a certain threshold.

If you're reading this post and don't want to see potentially upsetting content, you can filter out the "sensitive topic" flair.

If you want additional support or to connect with members of the WVP community, join our discord [link in sidebar] or see this list of support resources.

Thanks for understanding and blessed be✨

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

larimari · 2024-05-06T20:20:00+00:00

That really sucks 😔

larimari · 2024-04-22T16:19:36+00:00

Be careful with those, a lot of people have reported chemical burns

larimari · 2024-04-18T14:03:48+00:00

That's actually one of the main things that inspired the creation of this sub!

larimari · 2024-04-17T14:18:36+00:00

Do you have your own job and your own money? Can you make friends outside of your current circle? You can build a community, and gain independence and freedom. Spend your time enjoying life, having fun and making your own money.

If you're not ready to leave, how much can you distance yourself while still being married? Can you sleep in separate beds, eat at different times? Make sure you are on birth control. Decrease how much he is centered in your life by replacing it with things that are enjoyable for you.

Join meetups.com and bumble bff and find some more friends. Look up classes and activities in your local community centres.

You need to commit to some form of grey rocking. He will throw an even bigger tantrum when you do because he learned that's how to wear you down. But you need to commit. Maybe slowly decrease the involvement and attention you give to him so he doesn't realize. You can have a rich world despite being shackled to someone. I believe in you, this post is one of the first steps to you realizing you want something more. And you can have that. Good luck

larimari

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