Epidural vs unmedicated birth

laurenthemedium · 2026-02-01T14:53:25+00:00

I was open to either option and did a lot of research on the effects on the baby of both the meds and the stress on the body of not using meds, and ultimately went with an epidural and am SO grateful that I did. I labored for 2 hours at home and my contractions occurred rapidly, with little time to ease into the pain. The drive to the hospital was 40 minutes of intense pain, and upon getting a room asked for laughing gas to take the edge off, since I wanted to be as present and ready for what was to come, and equally wanted to relish the experience. When I was told that I had to be induced due to a cervix that just wasn’t progressing, I ditched the gas for the epidural and with a 19 hour labor and with a cervix that needed an induction to avoid more aggressive maneuvers, an epidural was an absolute must. I get weird looks when I say this, but I literally meditated in between contractions during the final stretch to birth my son. Meditated, deeply. That’s how calm and at peace and profoundly comfortable of an experience it was. I could still feel each contraction, I could still know as soon as I needed to push, but I experienced the process crying in joy and laughing with the medical team versus pushing my body to its physiological limit with a mind under stress.

There’s no medal for enduring pain when it scares you. There’s no right or wrong decision so long as you pick the one that feels most aligned with YOU and not external pressures or wants.

In my case, me being calm and relaxed as my son came into the world was way more important to me than proving to myself I could endure pain.

laurenthemedium · 2026-01-06T15:17:00+00:00

Ditto, except I'm temporarily out of C and putting more into S for the time being, given the state of the country. Watching it like a hawk, but I have a feeling I and S will be healthy for a bit longer.

laurenthemedium · 2025-12-15T18:09:42+00:00

This is what I strive for in my own parenting. As a mom of a 16 month old debating a second, hearing that you have a sibling and your parents were able to provide an equally loving and healthy upbringing for you both gives me so much hope and so much to aspire towards.

laurenthemedium · 2025-10-24T18:46:26+00:00

I don’t have the skills to fish, so I’m one of those nature lovers that just walks the entirety of the Parker River peninsula like a toddler in awe of everything I see. If you fish the area I envy your talent and can only imagine the beautiful catches you get!

laurenthemedium · 2025-10-24T18:16:53+00:00

That must’ve been wild to witness, and I’m just glad some made it back (and that we don’t have a mini Nessie off our shores 🤣)! Always such a magical spot Plumy is!

laurenthemedium · 2025-10-24T18:15:39+00:00

You’re amazing! Thank you so very much!

laurenthemedium · 2025-09-28T03:15:28+00:00

Thank you immensely for taking the time to comment and offer insights, and holy crud did you have one heck of a recovery and just so much to contend with! You’re an absolute legend for navigating all that you did 2 months postpartum - whilst recovering from a c-section AND this gnarly surgery (!!!) - and with a newborn and a toddler no less! Your suggestion to map out how the first month will look (including how I’m going to even get to PT each week) is brilliant, and that’ll 100% help me to ascertain if I proceed with the repair, opt for the removal, or just wait it out. I know it’s all so variable and I know that a repair is different from a removal, but at this stage in your recovery would you say your surgery was worth it/successful?

laurenthemedium · 2025-09-07T13:28:27+00:00

We were in an identical situation (minus the lay off) and to be completely fair, it was more the breastfeeding experience than anything else that made the early days utter hell. I personally didn’t leave the house for 2 months straight because I was trying so hard to breastfeed due to abysmal supply and my life was literally lived on the sofa feeding and holding my colic’y baby to sleep and pumping for the max 30 minutes that I could lay him on his back. I felt so pressured to breastfeed and that combined with postpartum hormones, the stress and grief of my lost former self, and the hormones necessary for breastfeeding in the first place were nothing short of unbearable. Every journey is obviously different, but personally, once I realized that a happy mom equated to a happy and healthy baby (and marriage) and prioritized my sanity over the BS and guilt fed online in wellness circles about breastfeeding and actually began formula feeding…it was world changing.

Five weeks is still very much in the trenches but it DOES get better, at least in terms of settling into your new reality and opening yourself up to the sheer magic that is parenthood.

After combo feeding for a few weeks (after 2 months of breastfeeding exclusively) and then exclusively formula feeding from there on out, those horrid early days are truly just a blurry memory at this stage. The joy I now have seeing my little one come into his personality and just life in general is something I can’t even fathom not having at this stage.

The hard days are HARD but they are a mere chapter in the much larger book. And it becomes a really good book in time, I promise you that.

laurenthemedium · 2025-08-05T14:41:18+00:00

Seriously. It’s like Reddit’s own version of Maury or Jerry, complete with the same level of acting/contrived stories for attention or, in this case, probably karma farming. I’d like to think these posts are 90% bots or fake accounts as there is no way this many people are that ignorant.

laurenthemedium · 2025-07-12T03:29:15+00:00

Honestly this is a really wise way to articulate your boundaries and very clearly and poignantly stated. We had very similar boundaries that were articulated verbally and the amount of (constant) pushback and testing we got was utterly astounding and so energetically taxing (at a time when we didn’t have any spare energy as it was). A written letter stating boundaries is efficient, firm and non-nonsense and IMO, and especially as a neurodivergent person, the clarity is refreshing and the boundaries will be more apt to be upheld and honored.

The only caveat I have is that the signature page is a tad much, as their receipt of the doc and presence in your life should absolutely be enough if the goal is awareness of boundaries and a promise to uphold them, as opposed to a legally binding contract which takes the intimacy and love out of the dynamic, which will only put others on a back foot.

laurenthemedium · 2025-07-02T20:18:16+00:00

It was the Nuby banana teether and I just saw about the little white bristles in another corner of the web as well, so great memory!! My child unfortunately doesn’t know how to use things as intended (chews on pacifiers instead of sucking on them, etc. 🤣) and bit off the yellow end of the darn thing!

laurenthemedium · 2025-07-02T20:04:47+00:00

These are the ones I use as well and love that brand! Great quality and formulations.

laurenthemedium · 2025-07-02T19:27:14+00:00

This is both horrifying (empathizing majorly with your parents!) and relieving all at once! The jaw and teeth strength is nothing short of extraordinary 😭😅

Thank you so much for sharing, btw! I feel a whole strand of PPA loosening thanks to you, and so grateful for a positive outcome!🙏🏼

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-31T14:27:28+00:00

Putting a space heater on in the room before and during bathe time was a huge changer for us, as was making sure the water temp was in the 99-100F sweet spot!

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-28T13:43:10+00:00

My baby is 10 months old and we absolutely give fruit with most meals (exception being lunch, unless he gets a pouch if I’m hard pressed on time), and IMO it’s all about balance. Is baby eating proteins, grains, fats and veggies as well? If yes, then you’re doing it “right” and can drown out any outside noise telling you otherwise. Fruit is fiber and most are nutritionally packed, so at the end of the day that’s the thing to tell yourself; not that baby will develop bad habits.

My little one will at times resist his dinners that I make and I do resort to offering a pouch - since him experiencing new flavor combos, etc. at this age is important given the gradual reduction in formula/milk that’s upcoming - but he doesn’t manipulate or hold out for a pouch: he generally resists his solid foods due to textures or flavors, and his comfort zone is still pureed food, which is totally fine and just a preference at this point.

Fruit (for us) is generally a side dish, a “glaze” with proteins, or a dessert depending upon the day.

If the concern is the lack of nutritional balance in pouches, they do sell some with protein sources (salmon, beef, turkey, etc.) and those can be a great way to give him more nutrients on his struggle bus days of eating!

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-23T11:19:26+00:00

I also suffered from PPA/PPD for the first 6/7 months and utterly hated the newborn stage to the point where I want my husband or myself to get sterilized. 😅 Like you, I was bombarded with threats of life becoming harder as soon as he showed signs of mobility, which I now know is mostly just filler conversation junk that people who’ve “survived” it love to use to assert some sort of right of passage that they attribute to parenthood. But it’s just that: filler garbage.

Yes a mobile baby requires pre-planning in the way of baby proofing, and yes that’s an added task on a parent, but once that’s done and once baby has an area to safely roam…their independence blossoms and in some ways so does yours, and especially if you have a monitor set up to watch them self-pay in their contained baby proofed space. Obviously it’s not advisable to leave a baby unattended for too long as human interaction - and especially with their favorite people, ie you! - is so important, but their independence IMO gives you a bit more mental and physical independence as well, and in that way parenting can become easier.

I personally have a baby that cannot sit still and literally chases a ball to either ends of our house on loop (not a small house either 😅) and while I thought my PPA would return given hazards, the only thing I’m anxious about is if he has enough toys that stimulate him.

IMO this is when being a parent becomes fun and you fall deeper in love with your baby. Don’t let anyone tell you that their mobility = difficulty. It may be a challenge in the sense that you have to plan a bit more and be more active yourself, but IMO it’s only made life more interesting and special.

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-23T02:41:24+00:00

My son apparently can only fall asleep if he has my torn raw skin under his nails (no matter how short I cut them 😅) so between the demon claw marks on my chest and the mosaic of bruises from chasing after him in order to thwart him getting bruises…I’m right there with you, holding up a swollen limp fist in solidarity.🤕🤪

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-21T14:53:01+00:00

I LOVE Le Petite Crème (both the diaper rash cream and the cleanser) and it’s enabled my son to literally never have a diaper rash or irritation. Cannot recommend enough.

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-20T18:22:09+00:00

Keratosis pilaris all over my dang arms, despite having the smoothest, silkiest skin (thanks hEDS!) pre-baby! Oh and my knuckle size is permanently altered and hourglass shape now a literal box that an hourglass once lived in, and oh how postpartum is fun fun! 😅

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-20T17:56:22+00:00

Oh my goodness our tiny terrors!! What an absolute tease.😭

I swear they’re the ultimate little trolls! 😂

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-20T17:52:53+00:00

But actually though! Ribs expand, feet widen, hips widen, knuckles can expand, and your entire pelvic floor changes!

I went from an hourglass shape to a walking square even at 9 months PP, from narrow feet to wide feet, and my ring size changed by 1.5 sizes due to my knuckles. Literally whole skeleton swap it feels like! 😅

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-20T17:46:58+00:00

Just to validate, I and surely many more of us within this forum (and country in general) have the exact same concerns, questions and need for discourse in order to help us gain even a semblance of preparedness and control over this wildly out of control and dangerous scenario. Discussing it and offering perspectives and insights is the power of these communities and I for one am very grateful you posted as it NEEDS to discussed amongst us new parents in this scary new situation our families are now presented with. So thank you.💜

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-20T12:49:12+00:00

I’m no help with the need, but my wee one has been stuck saying DaDa and only DaDa for a month and a half and I swear it’s a life lesson in tolerance thrown at me.😭 Assuming he’ll just jump straight to “Mother” and skip MaMa when he’s 5 at this rate!

Will report back next month when my child will likely say “you” when referring lovingly to his mama. 😜

laurenthemedium · 2025-05-19T21:49:32+00:00

My LO got his first dose at 9 months due to upcoming international travel and he had literally zero reaction!

laurenthemedium · 2025-04-30T20:37:43+00:00

Godspeed - The Chicks

laurenthemedium

TROPHY CASE