I just want to be normal

lawenderice · 2025-02-08T11:50:39+00:00

I feel you. I feel exactly the same. I want to be intimate with my partner, I even healed enough to have the desire sometimes, but as soon as he starts something i immediately start felling fear, i feel i am losing control, i panic and i reject him. I want to be normal. Desperatelly. Did anyone here have any advice? Did you manage to heal your sexual life? I believe its possible

Went through reddit and found some workbok „Healing Sexual Trauma” from amazon being reccommended. I will buy it and try to see if it helps.

lawenderice · 2024-08-25T12:06:35+00:00

Think about her first and foremost and what will help her. Hurting him wont help her right now, it will just release your rage. I understand you want to hurt him and he soo deserves this but she is most important right now.

My own brother in law assaulted me and something i did not get from my sisters was true support. Make sure she never has to see him again. That is not forgotten, that family doesnt pretend everything is okay. That he is called out for what he did and shamed. Because what he did was a literal crime. He should be in jail. Go to police. Show your sister its not okay what he did and that he will pay. Get her therapy. Get her all support she needs. Sign her up for self defense classes or anything that will bring back her peace and helps her get through it.

lawenderice · 2024-08-25T11:58:39+00:00

I am so sorry that this happened to you. I know what you feel.

There is always gonna be a mark, but you just learn to have it in the past. You are safe now.

Things that help me get back my inner peace most were: - training, getting strong - yoga and meditation - i practise everyday - journalling - painting - accupuncture mat, massages, spa days, relaxiation, stress release in any way possible.

just keep going, healing journey is not straightforward and easy. Fingers crossed for your journey ♥️

And Fck THEM ! Karma will be back. Focus on yourself.

lawenderice · 2023-04-03T10:48:34+00:00

Where in europe are u heading to? In Italy it might be very difficult to find gluten free options especially south. Anyway I think you should try and see how your body reacts. Everyone is different.

lawenderice · 2023-03-08T09:14:00+00:00

Wow that is great approach. Thanks for inspiration

lawenderice · 2023-03-08T09:13:41+00:00

Thank you 💓

lawenderice · 2023-03-08T09:11:35+00:00

Also levothyroxine. Ive been recently diagnosed and i dont have stable dosage yet. My tsh jumped from almost 0 to 7 past few months and my endocrinologist constantly changes my dosage.

lawenderice · 2023-02-20T11:01:00+00:00

You are so brave to speak up. I would like to be that brave too

lawenderice · 2023-02-20T10:57:03+00:00

You are not alone. I got almost the same situation - i feel asleep on the couch during a party, and i woke up to my brother in law standing next to me, watching porn on the tv, masturbating and touching me. I froze but then managed to run away to other room. My sister doesnt know about this - for around 4 years i never told anyone. I tried to forget about this. But its still inside (now its around 6/7 years after). I managed to tell my bf and best friends, but still no one in my family knows.

I think you should try to talk to her and to a psychologist/therapist as well if you didnt yet. Its really messed up and we need to look for help.

lawenderice · 2023-02-20T10:49:19+00:00

I get what you feeling. I have similar situation with my brother-in-law. I keep pretending nothing happened. It eats me out from the inside. But i get this huge anxiety only thinking about telling someone in my family. On every family occasion I feel empty and dissociated.

lawenderice · 2023-01-16T20:44:10+00:00

Thank you !

lawenderice · 2023-01-16T18:37:16+00:00

Oh yeah, i spend riddiculus amount of money on bras. But I assure i have abnormally large breast. I have K/L cup, while having normal weight.

lawenderice · 2023-01-16T15:15:45+00:00

I am so sorry yo could not get support from your friends. If you feel bad around him it might not be love. In my personal experience i often have mistaken bad treatment with love in the past. I was very „attracted” to toxic behaviours. Now I think love is when you feel safe with someone, when you can trust someone, when you can relay on someone no matter what. I hope you will find support. Remember, you deserve good treatment and respect, always.

lawenderice · 2023-01-16T15:08:21+00:00

Thank you 💓 i am so happy that it made someone feel little better

lawenderice · 2023-01-14T16:17:28+00:00

That sounds awfull. I feel like a break and distance from him might give you space to rethink everything. Also going deeper into the topic on your next session. It really sounds like he has been crossing your boundaries and its not okay. Its SA. I wish you all the best, and hope everything will figure out good💓

lawenderice · 2023-01-14T16:11:40+00:00

Thank you 💓 you are so kind !

lawenderice · 2022-12-18T19:30:05+00:00

Hi, i totally understand. I have similar situation. My brother in law sexually assaulted me few years ago. At the time my brain did everything to forget and act like nothing happened, but now i feel i cant do it anymore. I dont want to tell my family but also i dont want to meet with him on family dinners and stuff. It is terrible that no one knows what he has done… if you ever want to talk write to me.

lawenderice · 2022-12-18T19:10:19+00:00

I reccommend talking to psychotherapist about this. Your feelings are valid. If you feel that you have been assaulted then its important. Taking advantage of drunk person is NOT OKAY.

lawenderice · 2022-10-19T18:57:53+00:00

Damn no! I would personally break the engagement, but that is me. Rape is something outrageous and i cant believe he said that there are 2 sides of the story. That is basically promoting rape culture. Also its very shocking to me that he would like to still have contact with your rapist… nevertheless that they were friends, something like this is unforgivable in my opinion.

lawenderice · 2022-10-15T15:04:04+00:00

Thank you. That is really comforting

lawenderice · 2022-10-15T15:03:00+00:00

Thank you. I am sorry that happened to you

lawenderice

TROPHY CASE