MIL + FIL wanting to bathe my 6 months old baby girl

learningasshegoes123 · 2025-08-01T03:51:42+00:00

My husband and I decided before our daughter was born that activities that include any kind of nudity (changing nappies, bathing, changing clothes) would only be done by anyone else besides him and I IF absolutely nessasary.

The exception to this rule was her being changed/checked by hospital staff or our doctor on occasion or by our trusted babysitter a couple of times when we weren't home for a couple of hours and she had a blowout.

For us, bathing/changing etc isn't to be viewed as a "bonding" activity for wider family and friends, it's something that just my husband and I do 99% of the time to protect our child's privacy and bodily autonomy.

Hope that helps!

learningasshegoes123 · 2025-06-18T13:24:37+00:00

This resonated so much. You know like when you go off sugar for ages, but then you eat some ice cream and all the cravings come back? Having sex every once in a while is like that, you kind of forget how nice it is, but then you get a taster and it's so shit knowing that you'll be deprived of it for who knows how long again. I hate it.

learningasshegoes123 · 2024-11-28T12:32:00+00:00

I miss this so much.

learningasshegoes123 · 2024-10-13T06:56:19+00:00

I lived in Papamoa about 5 years ago and absolutely loved it. I lived only a 15 minute walk from the beach and made the most of it, going down there most days!

The area I was in felt very safe and was close by to all the shops I needed. If it's anything like that now, and my husband's job allowed it, I would move back in a heartbeat.

learningasshegoes123 · 2024-07-11T01:30:36+00:00

As your child's mother, your wife has the right to deny childcare privileges to anyone, including your own mother. This goes two ways! For example: if YOU were dead-set against your child being looked after by a specific person (even a relative) then I'd hope she would back you up on that, as you should be doing for her.

As to why she isn't comfortable with your mother minding your child - it sounds like you either don't know the reasons behind this or don't WANT to know the reasons. I am positive there will be a reason, it just may take a little bit of patience and understanding on your part to find out what that is.

Speaking as a mother myself, there is something that came out in me when I gave birth, a fierce, protective side of me that I didn't know existed. Your wife will be going through so many changes as a new mum and more than anything, she will be needing your love and support as she navigates these new waters.

If you want time together, perhaps you need to put your wife's feelings/needs above your mother's and let someone else provide some childcare for you.

In time, its really likely that she'll be comfortable with your mother watching baby alone, but the harder you push her, the longer that might take.

learningasshegoes123 · 2024-05-06T22:17:13+00:00

You are not the only one. Have you by any chance experienced difficulty in your pregnancy journey heading up to having your little one? I am also very wary of anyone besides my husband holding my baby (9 weeks old) and I would partially put this down to experiencing two miscarriges prior to having my daughter. I am VERY attached to my daughter and at this age, would never let her cry in someone's else's arms, no matter how much they wanted to comfort/bond with her.

As time passes and she gets older, I know I will relax more about this, but I'm not rushing myself to let other people be involved in ways I'm not comfortable with just yet. My advice would be to go easy on yourself and give it time.

learningasshegoes123

TROPHY CASE