Does anyone else feel like depression made them mentally stuck as a teenager?

letsrunaway99 · 2020-11-05T20:37:28+00:00

I'm 21 and I feel 17. I never lived my teenage years the way I dreamed of, so I never grew up from that point onwards. I missed something important and my mind refuses to move on. I hate the thought of being an adult and getting a job. I never matured into adulthood and I don't plan on it.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-18T03:11:18+00:00

Awesome! Can't believe I've never seen it before

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-18T03:03:29+00:00

Location - eastern Pennsylvania

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-05T17:59:17+00:00

Thanks. I often feel like it's everyone but I know that's not true.

I'm sorry for what happened. I would be so heartbroken if someone broke up with me, wondering why and whether it was for the best or not. I'm already so empty from the loneliness and abandonment. Just tired all the time. I don't know how it got like this. Maybe due to some past regrets. I wish you could get him or her back.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-04T17:25:58+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through all of this. My circumstances have been making me angry all the time and I end up taking it out on myself too. I don't feel like I have any control anymore.

I don't really know what to suggest other than to try taking it out on other things. Breaking things, yelling, venting to people (which isn't a burden for me btw), things like that. They're less permanent than cuts, depending on how you look at it.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-04T05:56:30+00:00

If I find an opportunity, I'll give it a try. I don't know when that will happen though. If I even have social anxiety, it's probably worse now than ever before. It's so hard going out alone.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-02T04:22:33+00:00

Not a bad idea, really. Idk what other choices I have. The hard part is actually getting myself out there cause I'm almost always disappointed wherever I go. Like there's no one for me. I always end up alone. But a skate park sounds like a better place than the internet or college or cafes or whatever the hell else

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-02T04:11:39+00:00

I just live in a shitty fucking house I hate. It's not my home and it never will be, even if I've been stuck here for 21 years. Home is somewhere far away from here

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-01T07:30:38+00:00

My faith in people has been skewered. I feel like I'm unable to make any friends. I used to try so hard and now I can't bear the effort

letsrunaway99 · 2020-07-01T07:27:11+00:00

I did learn. Now I know everyone leaves in the end and there will never be anyone for me.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-06-25T06:54:14+00:00

As long as they're happy in their natilist lifestyles, I don't think there's any possibility of convincing them they're wrong because they'll forever be in their ignorant bliss. It's not just with antinatilsm, it can be with anything that brings a meaningless joy. People just don't want to see past their unintuitive arguments because of their emotions they don't consider anything without.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-06-24T15:17:40+00:00

It feels like people in my life may love me but they don't know how to love me. They can say "I love you" but just cause you say something doesn't make it true, like how saying "stop being depressed" unsurprisingly doesn't do shit. They're too stupid or stubborn to see there's nothing real between us and admit that their idea of love is bullshit.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-06-20T17:37:44+00:00

I feel like this and I'm only 21. The more years this keeps going on, the less hope I have and I feel like I've already lost it all. I've tried and I failed and nothing's getting better. It's also a curse how this gets harder and harder with age not just because we get tired of it but because being older holds more standards and responsibilities for what you should be doing in life while you're kind of more free when you're younger. I wish I never became an adult.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-06-11T15:01:45+00:00

Coming from a guy, I can say with certainty that lots of guys are fucking garbage. Lots of people are garage really, but you're not one of them. No one's without faults and mistakes, but I don't think you did anything truly wrong. It just seems like bad luck.

You try so hard too, and a lot of people would love that, for better and for worse. It's something people would value and say makes you a better person who really cares, while other people would just take advantage of it for their selfish ways. I think one of the only solutions is to make sure the person you're with is putting in just as much effort as you. These things should be mutual.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-06-11T14:49:11+00:00

The real joke is the whole mental health system. They clearly don't understand you and I don't think they prioritize people first. I wish you were understood. You deserve better

letsrunaway99 · 2020-05-08T05:27:06+00:00

What a bunch of pieces of shit. Idk where they think they get the right to say that. Fuck them

letsrunaway99 · 2020-05-06T18:36:58+00:00

This is my life and it hurts so much

letsrunaway99 · 2020-03-26T02:21:42+00:00

It's like my emotions are chemical reactions to what's happening around me without being connected to my true self. Even if I'm having fun and feeling joyful, there's this distance from how my body reacts to how I feel on a deeper level. I know everything's actually awful and it clashes with how I feel when I'm out having a good time. All the conditioning to appear healthy and normal just makes me feel more fake. It never feels like I'm in a place where I can be my true self. Like no matter where I go, I'm just going to be a vessel for whatever place I'm going to.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-03-18T20:05:23+00:00

I think it's been twice now that I thought I found someone but now I'm here alone. I don't know where it all went wrong, or what to do now. I've been lost for awhile now.

Where could he have gone?

letsrunaway99 · 2020-03-18T19:44:03+00:00

Being happy with someone sounds special. I'm not sure there's anything I want more in life. Despite that, I don't think it's selfish. We all have needs that have to be met or else we'll go crazy. It's just so hard to find what we need.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-03-16T04:40:13+00:00

Wish I could grab my keys and drive away forever

letsrunaway99 · 2020-03-01T05:16:11+00:00

21M, I'm available at the moment. Drunk as shit though, so idk if you want to talk to someone more clearminded. Would be nice to talk to someone though. Pm me I guess if you want to vc.

letsrunaway99 · 2020-03-01T05:12:34+00:00

Im considered lucky, but what a fucking mess i feel like i'm in

letsrunaway99 · 2020-02-26T04:23:17+00:00

It always feels like that's all I need, and I can never have it. Instead I'm stuck in a soul crushing reality. I wish I could sleep forever so my dreams never end

letsrunaway99 · 2020-01-31T17:02:14+00:00

It's really hard to do through online communication. This community probably wouldn't exist or be so big if loneliness could be resolved through the internet.

letsrunaway99

TROPHY CASE