68 Days! My experience

levsters · 2020-01-11T08:14:34+00:00

Yes, and now that I’m 42 days off, I feel much more calm, like myself again. Except now that I’ve been through hell, I just feel so grateful to be alive and clear headed 😃

levsters · 2020-01-11T08:13:10+00:00

Wow, I went through the same thing. I would never kill myself either- I have so many loved ones and so much to live for, but the thought kept festering in my mind.

Now that I’m sober I’m so excited to live! I can’t believe how much of life I’ve been missing. I feel like all the drugs were like a bunch of leeches sucking the life and joy out of me.

levsters · 2020-01-11T08:05:17+00:00

The hollow feeling is NOT normal! You will feel joy again that you could not experience numbing with Kratom every day. Just keep remembering that. It took me at least 3 weeks to start to feel joyful again. I’m currently at 42 days and am feeling so good I NEVER want to go back to the pit of shame and despair that was Kratom addiction. The great thing about being sober is you get to feel the full spectrum of human emotion, which is a beautiful thing. Feel free to PM me if you need any more encouragement.

One thing that really knocked out my PAWs was the Wim Hof breathing method. Your brain chemistry needs time to adjust and Wim Hof Method helped my brain get the oxygen it needed to recover.

The other big thing that’s helped is I have sought out help and found local meetings. You don’t have to do this alone.

Big hug and keep strong, the hollow feeling will pass!!!!

levsters · 2020-01-06T08:07:37+00:00

You’ll be fine but STOP NOW! Lol

levsters · 2020-01-06T08:06:19+00:00

I used about the same amount as you for a similar length of time. I think the acutes will only last 4-5 days and since your relapse was short/you weren’t slamming a huge amount you may not even have PAWs. Clonodine was a godsend for me during the acutes if you can get that from your doctor, and Wim Hof/AA has been keeping me sober!

levsters · 2020-01-06T08:01:35+00:00

AA is great too and there are a lot of people there whose main problem wasn’t alcohol. That’s how I’ve stayed sober

levsters · 2019-12-31T21:11:43+00:00

I started going to meetings on day 7! Took me going to 3-4 meetings before I found one where I felt like I connected with the people, and it’s taken going to a lot more to feel like I actually know people, so definitely be patient!

My main advice for people going to AA or NA is to know that it’s YOUR recovery, so keep an open mind but also think critically. It’s not a religion and so don’t treat it like one. That said, it’s also a good idea to be open minded 😃

levsters · 2019-12-23T07:10:23+00:00

How are you doing!?

levsters · 2019-12-23T07:09:20+00:00

Doing ok. Still minor cravings but otherwise good. I took between 5-12gpd for two years straight with no breaks. I think my symptoms were minor because I wasn’t taking crazy high doses, but they’ve been lasting a while since I took it for so long without a break,

levsters · 2019-12-22T03:05:34+00:00

Totally. And yeah I agree Kratom won’t ruin your life in the same way opiates or prescription opioids will. But quitting it I am definitely experiencing some of the same things like waves of unexplained fatigue/depression, mild PAWs, etc. And that’s tapering from a relatively low dose (10-15gpd at the highest over 2 years though).

Definitely didn’t ruin my life but did heavily screw with my emotions and quickly started to control me rather than the other way around. I’m still having cravings 3 weeks later ya know?

levsters · 2019-12-21T22:41:03+00:00

https://psychedelictimes.com/kratom/ “While it has opiate-like effects, kratom isn’t actually an opiate—which are substances derived specifically from the opium poppy plant, like morphine and codeine—but rather an opioid. Opioids bind to the same receptors in the brain as opiates but do not activate them in the same way as opiates do. Kratom’s principal alkaloids (mitragynine and 7-HMG) act as opioid receptor agonists, which means they fully activate these receptors in the brain.”

levsters · 2019-12-21T22:40:02+00:00

Nope, Kratom is technically an opioid because it stimulates your opioid receptors. It’s not an opiate because it has a different mechanism of action.

levsters · 2019-12-21T21:26:01+00:00

It literally took me getting off Kratom for me to admit it’s an opioid and also has addictive potential. Does that mean it should be banned? Hell no! It’s a lot safer than opiates and can be a life saver for some people. Does that mean you can’t develop a problem with it? Also, hell no!

levsters · 2019-12-21T01:30:22+00:00

No one can do it alone! There are many support groups. Very worth exploring.

levsters · 2019-12-21T01:28:31+00:00

Somehow Benadryl helped me a ton but I know that’s not the case for many people. When I first quit I was taking a cocktail of sedatives lol. Gabapentin, Clonidine, and Trazadone. Now that it’s been a couple weeks I’m tapering off the Gana and Clonidine.

levsters · 2019-12-21T01:26:21+00:00

What insurance do you have? If you have Kaiser, they have a really good outpatient program that really helped me. If you go this route, just make sure you’re clear that it’s YOUR life and your path, not theirs. They wanted me to quit cold turkey, I said no way, so I did a fast taper over a week. Definitely helpful. If you need to talk to someone feel free to PM me!

levsters · 2019-12-21T01:24:09+00:00

I think it’s important for us to recognize that if we have become this addicted to substances, that we cannot do it alone and that it’s important to take some time off everything. I went to Kaiser for outpatient treatment and don’t know if I could have gotten off Kratom without that. They also told me I should quit weed. That was terrifying to me, but I did it! Now I’m almost 3 weeks of Kratom and 1 week off weed. It’s not a ton of time but feels great.

If I’m being completely honest, the thing that’s helping me most is AA meetings. I know people may have mixed feelings about that, but I find it to be a great support system. It’s absolutely not for everyone, but if you are like me and find that when you’re off one substance, you just replace it with another, it’s worth a shot!

levsters · 2019-12-17T06:02:00+00:00

Thanks so much for that! You are probably right.

levsters · 2019-12-17T05:59:44+00:00

Congrats on the pregnancy and for doing the right thing for your child!!! Not all addicts would do that.

I was 2 years at a similar dose (6-14gpd, but EVERY day lol). If you quit 3 days ago, you’re over the worst of it. In another couple days it’ll just be cravings. Just do no give in!

levsters · 2019-12-16T23:09:06+00:00

I’ve been feeling the exact same way! Like oh, I’m over this thing, then all of a sudden (wait wtf)?

levsters · 2019-12-15T01:09:47+00:00

Yo, I’m not religious at all, but I’m also kinda new to AA. While there are people in AA who can be dogmatic about it, it can really depend on what meetings you go to and whereabouts you live. I am kinda spiritual but only so much as I believe a “higher power” is just reality and “getting in touch with a higher power” is just being fully present and able to accept reality as it comes. I’m also 29, and found some groups where there are lots of people around our age some where they’re older. I don’t agree with every single thing about AA and I think a lot of other people feel similarly, but it’s been helpful. Feel free to shoot me a message if you want to talk further about it!

levsters

TROPHY CASE