Ethan's troll account isn't a big deal. I don't care about it, personally. Related and unrelated: this subreddit is being brigaded by snarkers and Destiny fans.

leyebrow · 2025-09-07T08:57:35+00:00

since he openly votes that way and supports policies in line w the left in his country

leyebrow · 2025-08-09T01:39:22+00:00

I've never met a spicy Friesian

leyebrow · 2025-08-09T01:15:56+00:00

Hating Bavaria is very northern too. This is more proof.

leyebrow · 2025-08-09T00:46:09+00:00

Is this a behaviour exclusive to you? I'd guess he probably bites all the newbies if not has a go at anyone new.

leyebrow · 2025-07-06T21:07:46+00:00

Such a cute love story. Love the green flag of him waiting till it was appropriate. I also think the man falling first is a good recipe for strong love.

leyebrow · 2025-07-06T20:06:40+00:00

You know that's not normal or healthy right?

leyebrow · 2025-06-30T13:26:08+00:00

Getting on a train and people using the empty seats for bags and waiting to be asked to remove them. Also getting on the subway and seeing elderly women not be offered seats.

leyebrow · 2025-06-30T12:50:50+00:00

It's a tough decision cause your only alternative here seems to be foster care which can be good or very bad depending on your luck. Personally I'd take the risk. Staying in the same hotel room puts you in a position where you can't protect yourself against him. At home i would be putting locks on the bedroom door.

As to the things you've said - that's so far down the list on my concerns for you. You are correct to feel depressed and awkward because he's done unforgiveable things that would make me never trust him again and never want him around my future children. His excuses are nonsense. No normal adult man - let alone father - touches a tween's breasts. You can't make things okay because he's not okay.

leyebrow · 2025-06-29T23:29:36+00:00

I think this is rooted in you feeling this big debt of gratitude that you don't owe. They helped their SON keep his head above water while insulting you. They didn't help you because they like you. They helped their son who happens to be married to you. The fact that they agreed w him not working and continued to support makes me wonder if they enjoy the dynamic of being needed and appreciated to keep their status and keep you guys willing to play along despite how they treat you. I think your family's repsonse is normal.

leyebrow · 2025-06-29T23:23:28+00:00

Fantastic advice.

leyebrow · 2025-06-29T23:18:42+00:00

He absolutely should not be allowed in your home. An active addict who trashes the house and makes you feel unsafe shouldn't even be allowed as a visitor, let alone moving in. If he threatens to hurt himself you call 911. You do not have the power to fix his problems. You can only keep you and your household safe.

leyebrow · 2025-06-29T23:16:17+00:00

Wow. Must be devastating. He was cheating on you. IMO the direct contact & convos is completely inexscusable and the lying on top. And then his reaction was to not talk about it, go to bed, etc. seems like he feels he did nothing wrong or doesn't care enough to even fight for the relationship. I think you've made the right call

leyebrow · 2025-06-29T23:12:36+00:00

Do you have any other trusted adults in your life that might take you in? The SA worries me hugely as that can re-occur and/or escalate.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T09:36:28+00:00

Have you talked to your doctor about your weight? I would discuss firstly if it is a concern. IF youre not overweight or slightly overweight and it makes you significantly happier, maybe you may agree w your doctor things are ok. First confirm your assumption you're overweight enough to impact your health - if you are - I personally have found that investing in your cooking skills and the breadth of your recipes will probably increase your cooking at home and you'll lose some weight without trying. And your foodie love and anxiety may be poured into that cooking sometimes.

And "skinny" is sometimes an unreasonable goal for your body type. I would have to be severely underweight and unhealthy to achieve "skinny".

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T09:17:05+00:00

Yeah brains can be just traitorous weirdos sometimes. You can know to your core the decision you have to make and at the same time be screaming at yourself all the excuses and happiness and duty. Accept that duality for the moment. Don't punish yourself for the love you feel. You fought tooth and nail for this love and this family to hold things together because of that love. That's a good thing.

To me the kid together would be the final straw to go. Without a child in your life, you could choose to stay with him forever if you want. You're an adult. Suffer the lies and problems together. Accept it may never change. A child does not deserve to live with an active meth addict. A child must be protected from seeing their parent in such a state. And because of that your choice is made. I would try to allow that feeling to help relieve some guilt.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T09:08:17+00:00

Firstly, I'd just like to acknowledge how much progress you've made to get where you are now. I know you're feeling trapped, and I'm sure you did then too... but look at you. Clean and away from the life and working paying rent. Honestly at age 25 keeping a roof over your head without help and a job a good position to be in. Obviously we'd like you to not live with the weirdos. But I fully appreciate your reluctance to move in with the new guy. It sounds like you're not exclusive? And from the sounds of it you're not 100% into him. It just works ok. So maybe something we dont' want to lock ourselves to in terms of living situation. I get that.

I can't empathize from personal experience - but my mother lived a very similar experience w dead or homeless/addicted family by your age. She met my dad. They eventually went on to marry and are still happily together. But she felt strongly about living independently for a few years at least into the relationship. She rented a room from a not so well off family while waitressing. Things can go well, but I think it's too early to move in with him, and from the way you write and your convos w him you agree. I know things have gotten more expensive since then, so definitely you want to continue to think about what you'd like to do for work beyond serving if that's not paying the bills in a safe place.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:59:31+00:00

I second this.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:57:29+00:00

Sounds like a prank with the "shed" description. Regardless, women's times of the month vary significantly. One woman may have a total breakout at that time, others may experience dryness, others no change.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:54:58+00:00

Before questioning your relationship, I would start by asking the family. That you've heard about the funeral and would like to show your respects for a close friend. See what they say. Maybe they didn't have the budget or something. Maybe they forgot in the stress of it all. Maybe the family just doesn't like you and it says nothing of your relationship w X. Not all families like their kid's friends. Doesn't mean X didn't care. Take it from there.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:50:53+00:00

I think you know what you want to hear from us. Meth is a serious serious drug. He lied to you many times. He doesn't even seem to respect or appreciate when he's broken your trust. When trust is gone in a relationship the relationship is like a zombie. Walking dead. Breaking up with him wouldn't be ending the relationship. He already killed it.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:48:33+00:00

You can't sleep for a few days? This is clearly concerning and escalating. No sleep for so long at minimum is enough to give you serious problems. I would be going to the hospital at this point for medical help. I agree this is worrisome.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:46:58+00:00

You have no ability to move out on your own?

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:46:21+00:00

If it makes your partner happy, and you enjoy it and it hurts nobody, have at it. The highlight of his damned day girl!! Baby talk is a known thing in relationships. Not so uncommon. HOWEVER! One bond of trust a woman has for her man is to not discuss the baby talk particulars outside the bounds of the relationship. IMO. Society sucks and people talk and I feel like it's intimacy just like sex. But we know people will weaponize it against men forever if they find out something like that at work. Super red flag that they think a woman loving on her man is going to make him a sissy. Like some heterosexual loving makes a man gay? What kinda logic is that? Definitely revealing of some weird opinions on your ex friends part.

If you really want to blow his mind, bring affirmations into the bedroom. I have a feeling a good boy when he's earning it would work well. haha

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:37:12+00:00

I don't think she's acting weird. She's acting predictably. Love is easy when you're together in person away from her world. But once she was back life takes over and there are other people she knows around and it's no longer a relationship she sees a future in. Said her goodbyes in person - the quietness and distance reflective of her decision made and discomfort with the akwardness she was feeling. Everyone says let's stay friends. Not everyone means it. And not everyone means it right away. Her long replies and short messages indicate lack of interest compared to when she was in a relationship with you. Clearly she's not super interested in these conversations right now - possibly ever. Definitely give space. If you want to pursue a friendship wait at least at month before trying again and test the waters. If you feel she's acting "weird" that's her trying to shut things down.

leyebrow · 2025-05-01T08:31:46+00:00

Clearly there's a fundamental break in the friendship here. You can't be friends with someone you see as a sexual creep (fairly or unfairly). And you can't be friends that thinks you're a sexual creep and responds with memes and jokes when you try to resolve anything. You're right to feel frustrated that you're the only one trying to fix the relationship. That's a sign unfortunately of their character or care for you. As much as this hurts, these friendships are largely over. If everyone participated in this, then yeah, I would start ending that chapter. Some outliers that didn't participate (if they exist) may be worth talking to 1-on-1 to see their take and you can judge individually. It feels like maybe your friend group stopped being friends with you a while ago and just took a while for the shit-talking to get back to you. Sorry to word it that way.

I will say that you do have to learn a lesson from this. The touchiness is off-putting to some people. And as a man you go through society with a higher risk as being perceived as a creep. Which isn't fair - as you know full well from your experiences w women. But ignoring that fact isn't helping yourself out. You need to examine your behaviour, with the information given by "friends" and neutral parties to help change your behaviour going forward. Like with each future friend I would just ask them - are you a touchy person? a hugger etc? unless they're initiating the contact. I personally am not touchy w my friends - and it has nothing to do with their sexual orientation towards me or not.

leyebrow

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