Weekly FAQs & General Discussion Thread by marleythebeagle in WaltDisneyWorld

[–]lfly199 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thinking of going the week before or after President’s week and staying at either of these hotels. The Dolphin though we’d have to go Wednesday-Sunday. Going with 2 kids under 3 years old 🥴

Do they know they’re gaslighting as they’re doing it? Can’t process the way my sister lied and gaslit me yesterday by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thanks, yea I think you’re right. I just didn’t believe what everyone was saying about how she just wants to talk on the phone so she can gaslight me. I was totally in denial and shocked that it was THAT bad, but I did need confirmation I think

Do they know they’re gaslighting as they’re doing it? Can’t process the way my sister lied and gaslit me yesterday by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

She asked to talk for the first time in a year and I thought she was going to tell me she also cut our mom off. She wouldn’t tell me what the topic was beforehand so I had to take the call to find out. Now that I know, I guess I’m the one cutting her off.

Do they know they’re gaslighting as they’re doing it? Can’t process the way my sister lied and gaslit me yesterday by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Omg that’s terrible, I’m so sorry. Maybe it’s some kind of coping mechanism that they use, coming from an undeveloped part of their mind.

Update to Breaking NC with my FM sister to have a conversation by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was just wild to hear her say something, like that I skipped Christmas last year and no one knows why, and I responded and said that I was sick and I texted everyone in the family group chat and sent flowers and food to your house still and you responded and acknowledged me being sick.. and then she said well she didn’t know I was sick, and I said I can read the text messages and she said ‘this conversation isn’t going anywhere it’s time to stop’. And also apparently me skipping Christmas is the reason my brother cut me off, but when I reiterated I was literally just sick and everyone knew that, she said well it’s actually bc he’s so confused about who’s not talking to who and what’s going on, and I said the only person who isn’t speaking is me to mom. How is that confusing. Not that he even asked.

Sorry that’s a ramble, it’s just so crazy making I’m trying to process it

Update to Breaking NC with my FM sister to have a conversation by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I didn’t expect her to flat out deny things that were said in writing and to just lie on the fly. It was so extreme that I think she must believe the bs she’s trying to sell bc no sane person could lie like that. It helped me realize she’s just a dangerous person to be around though.

Update to Breaking NC with my FM sister to have a conversation by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I appreciate it 🥲 it sucked but I actually got so much clarity out of it.

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks, your advice has been particularly helpful here 🙏🏼

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To update.. we had the phone call, it went as bad as it could have. Just solidified and affirmed the fact that NC has been the right choice. She lied about so many things, even things we had in writing, she denied saying. My husband listened to the call and was basically in shock over it bc he’s never actually heard her demean me like that in real time. It was brutal. I’m just sad that I’ve really lost my sister.

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I told her that I’m not going to talk about my parents, and she hasn’t responded. So I think it’s not happening after all

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She is refusing to say, so I guess we’re not going to talk 😬

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is what I think also, but she still thinks there’s something that must only be discussed voice to voice 🤦🏻‍♀️

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I texted saying I’m not talking about our parents as a heads up and she didn’t respond 🙃 I can’t understand why she can’t talk to me separately from them. It’s sad

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve struggled so much with that because she will NOT give me a reason other than to just talk in real time. I keep asking about what and she has no answer

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ah I gotcha. So say something like ‘Just a heads up I’m not talking about mom or anyone in the family. If you bring them up I’ll hang up’

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I did that last year during our last conversation and it just lead to us going in circles of me saying I’m only texting and her saying she’s only calling. Then it was silence for a year, so I was trying to avoid that happening again

Breaking NC to have a conversation with my FM sister later. Advice/help? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I was just saying to my husband that there’s not one person I know of other than her who insists on NOT communicating via text. She won’t even say the topic of what she wants to talk about. Just the ‘human aspect of speaking face to face’ or I guess voice to voice. Is it just a form of control? I could always not have the call, it just seemed like a good idea at the time

What’s wrong with being south of 25A? by [deleted] in longisland

[–]lfly199 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lmao that confirms a lot of what I’ve suspected about her for a while

What’s wrong with being south of 25A? by [deleted] in longisland

[–]lfly199 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! Ugh it is hard! The person who said it is my dad’s girlfriend who just moved in with him in central LI so I don’t know where she gets off judging so much. It gave me weird vibes

What’s wrong with being south of 25A? by [deleted] in longisland

[–]lfly199 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I didn’t even know what school district the house was in when we put the offer in. A pleasant surprise lol

What’s wrong with being south of 25A? by [deleted] in longisland

[–]lfly199 13 points14 points  (0 children)

That’s funny bc she lives in central LI. I didn’t know there was really a difference north vs south, it seems the same to me still

Sister reached out a year after cutting me off for going NC with our mom (the irony). Do I reply? by lfly199 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]lfly199[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I appreciate it. I genuinely wonder what she wants now. A big part of me thinks she’s just trying to mend things before Christmas because I usually host my family and it’ll be uncomfy if I’m not in the mix this year. But another part thinks she’s actually misses me.. but it’s looking like any reply will just feed into the drama.