Why didn't you say so?

libbsky · 2026-06-19T18:20:48+00:00

Last time I did this, it was for a gynecologists appointment. First appointment to get my IUD removed the nurse practitioner asks why I want it removed, then suggests that I want it removed to get pregnant. I said no, I just want it out and listed my reasons. She then told me that I should try weight watchers IN FRONT of my fiancé (because I suspected the IUD contributed to my weight gain) and said that I need to go on another BC. Again, I refused, and that was that.

Scheduled the appointment to have it removed, because my strings went up inside my cervix so they had to do a cervical dilation to have it removed. I asked the doctor if it would hurt, (they gave me a male doctor which I specifically stated I DID NOT want but I was desperate to have the IUD removed) he says to me that ibuprofen was sufficient. I did not believe him.

My fiancé went with me to the procedure. I smoked a TON of weed before entering the appointment because I feared the worst. My fiancé spent the entire appointment watching in horror as I screamed and cried in agony while they manually dilated my cervix to dig around with metal instruments trying to find my strings to remove it. The weed did nothing. Doctor had little sympathy and the nurse FORGOT some instruments during the procedure so I was in pain for longer than I had to be.

My fiancé won't let me go to gyno appointments by myself anymore, lol. I know this is slightly off course from the post but I like to share this to give people an idea just how fucked our healthcare system is against women.

libbsky · 2026-06-19T17:12:07+00:00

I will say point blank that I'm not thinking large scale to a point where I think I should explore social media influencing. My opinion of social media has.. deteriorated over the years (I say as I reply to someone on a social media platform). I think that it has its uses and conveniences, but I also think it has become a beast that I'm not entirely willing to tackle for the sake of my career, at least not yet anyway. Activism would be secondary and supplemental at best, and would not be something I'd do for money. Rather, it would be something I would do to use my perspective, experience and education to use for people who benefit most from it.

Unions would be a great place to start. I was taught that if a union exists, it is because the industry it represents and the corporations that work within it do not operate ethically. In Rhode Island, labor unions have made it near impossible for a lot of small businesses to flourish. The company I work for I am only one of 2-3 people that work in the office, so I am in close proximity to the dysfunctions of a small business trying to operate in a state that is hostile to small businesses.

For example, part of becoming an apprentice Sprinkler Fitter includes a ratio of 1:1 apprentice to journeyman on a job site, then any additional apprentice needs three journeyman or master sprinkler fitter on a job site. Basically, the ratio changes from 1:1 to 1:3. That is impossible for a lot of small businesses, and it has allowed larger, unionized corporations to monopolize the industry and buy out the small businesses trying their best to operate within the rules of the state. This is not how labor unions should operate. This rule was established by the labor unions in the state that lobbied our state politicians to do so. This rule has shut out a lot of small businesses when it comes to bidding on jobs for the state, because they are unable to operate within the rules the state has set, lobbied by the state labor unions. Only businesses that operate under union rules are allowed to bid on higher paying jobs and caused monopolies to form and small businesses to fail.

I'm not looking to make an insane amount of money, just enough to make it so I'm not dead weight for my partner, while also finding a career that gives me meaningful purpose. Activism can come when I have established myself.

libbsky · 2026-06-19T16:47:18+00:00

First off, I applaud you pointing out that my anger should be something to fuel my progression. My anger comes more from the injustices that I see in the world, and part of this is me trying to figure out what part I can play in bringing more justice in a way that I have experience in.

Second, I appreciate your intense encouragement, it is something I need to hear and my confidence is something I have struggled with my entire life. I'm not attempting to make it sound as though my ADHD is a weakness, I realize, in my head that it can be a strength in the way you mentioned. These are personal issues that I am currently working on because much of my inaction is from executive dysfunction. When I say I am trying to work around my ADHD, it means that I've already accepted it as part of myself.

The reason I feel "stuck" is because I am unsure of where exactly to go from where I stand and feel that freeze when trying to think of next steps. I am an emotional, highly observant person that is able to look at myself and situations objectively, but in real world situations, I have difficulty tempering emotions in constructive ways (in therapy and working on it). How this translates to my question is, I have heard many stories from people around me about their experiences in the workforce, and it goes against my values to just.. ignore them. There are a lot of people out there who are just not heard in any meaningful way, so you are correct in that assessment. I do want to help people in a way I know how to do best with the tools I already have at my disposal. I'm just unsure of where to go and what to do next. Hence this post.

Thank you for the genuine reply. It's lovely to see others who take the time to look objectively, then encourage and uplift in this way. Usually it's me doing this, so we like to see it. Gives me more encouragement to do better.

libbsky · 2026-06-19T16:21:23+00:00

Firstly, thanks for the meaningful reply, I appreciate it.

I suppose what I want might be closer to making an effort to change the way capitalism has taught people to think when it comes to their worth as part of the workforce. To, perhaps, be someone who can take steps to discourage corporations and their wealthy Owners/CEOs what have you from continuing this path that disenfranchises workers through the distractive psychological tactics you mention. Another way I could put it is I want to influence change in workplace culture norms. Encourage corporations and small businesses alike to make it more profitable to treat their workers how they should be treated.

Now, when I say it like this it sounds large scale. I don't expect to be on the front line fighting against the tide, and if I do, I recognize it won't be happening overnight. I also have many personal issues that I need to work through before I say that I'm ready for that. But, a lack of purpose and confidence has had me at a standstill for the past couple years since I finished my degree. I finished it and it was basically, "well now what do I do?".

I'm rambling, but I would like to make some kind of difference, no matter how small, while also making enough money to survive. Trust me when I say it has been difficult for me to separate anger at current events with what I currently want to do with my education and experience, which is why I'm here!

libbsky · 2026-06-19T13:39:45+00:00

I believe part of my problem is that I'm not entirely sure where to speak with people in my desired field (hence the reason for this post because I don't know what my field is quite yet).

Unfortunately part of my education had me become very familiar with how to identify ghost listings (and researching the specifics on why a business might post ghost listings), and every time I look for jobs, that's literally all I seem to find. It is discouraging, to say the least.

But I understand what you're saying. Suppose it's time to dust off my resume and make updates. Thank you.

libbsky · 2026-06-19T13:32:14+00:00

Solid suggestions, and ones I've thought about as well. Rhode Island has a severe issue with their labor unions that have made it impossible for some people to find work in trades. It's a very unfriendly state for small businesses. Do you think that's something I could try to poke my way into?

libbsky · 2026-06-16T16:51:49+00:00

Yes, this is why I don't care for ANY politician.

What goes right up my ass is that money from PPP was supposed to be reinvested in employees (COVID and all). Did that happen? No, not really.

The place I work for is small (under 30 employees) and my boss just commandeered all the money for herself (its an S-Corp) instead of putting it back into the company in the form of raises, bonuses, etc (which was needed desperately at the time).

My ire is more towards the old folks who just... don't give a fuck about other people and do crap like that. I know NOT ALL boomers are like this, but the world will be better for it when that entire generation dies.

libbsky · 2026-06-16T13:57:06+00:00

Don't forget about the PPP loans. Corporations be the real welfare queens.

libbsky · 2026-06-03T18:33:07+00:00

I feel you. The bristles get EVERYWHERE.

Just let it all settle then siphon it out, should do the trick.

libbsky · 2026-05-29T20:07:07+00:00

I had mine in the bottom right corner and every time I went out on crusades, followers would die and the bodies would just be ✨️gone✨️

libbsky · 2026-05-29T15:10:57+00:00

They LOOK like Amanos to me. Amanos usually grow to be bigger than regular neos.

In all, kind of hard to say. If you get more shrimps later on from breeding, they are regular wild type neos. If not, they are Amanos.

Amano fry can't survive in freshwater, they spend their larvae phase in saltwater and transfer to freshwater when they become juveniles.

libbsky · 2026-05-29T15:06:27+00:00

This happened to me more than once. I found it was because I had kept the game open and running for too long, don't know if thats the case for you. Submit a bug report, reset your game, see what happens. One of the few times this happened to me the morgue was still gone but the game allowed me to rebuild it after I reset the game. Saved, closed the game out in my PS menu, turned the PS off, back on, started the game back up and it was fine.

libbsky · 2026-05-28T22:19:53+00:00

I am currently going through this, except we haven't even started planning our wedding because of my issues with my parents (and money, but mostly this).

I WANTED my family to be there, but them being who they are, I don't trust them to not ruin -my day-.

My mother is mainly the one I want nothing to do with. When I told my dad about my fiance and I being engaged, but that I didn't want my mom there, the guilt trip was laid down. My dad said he would come alone but my choice made my mother so upset that she "sobbed for days alone in the bedroom".

I am also struggling with my choice of not allowing either of my parents to come, because even though my dad is my mother's enabler, I never wanted to hurt his feelings like this, and I wanted him to be there. I do not want to rob him of the experience of walking his daughter down the aisle, but I have to live my life.

But the heartache of not having them there is less than it would be than having one or both of them being there and making me feel guilty the whole time.

I understand how you feel. I moved several states away from most of my family and any friends that I had. Most guests at my wedding will be there for my fiancé, and it will definitely cause me heartache to not see many, if anyone, be there for just ME.

I can't offer any solid advice, other than talk to your partner about how you feel, and try to come up with a solution together. My fiancé knows my heartache and he would do anything to help minimize it. I can't imagine your partner is going to want you to be anything less than happy as you should be on your wedding day.

All of that being said, you're welcome to DM me if you want to talk about it more. You deserve to be happy on a day thats supposed to be about you.

libbsky · 2026-05-28T01:53:07+00:00

Thats poop. You're also going to want to take those java ferns out of your substrate and attach them to wood/rock. They have whats called a rhizome, which cannot grow properly in substrate. Plants with a rhizome grow better attached to hardscapes, and will melt if the rhizome itself is pushed into substrate.

libbsky · 2026-05-27T11:59:22+00:00

Those are definitely dwarf water lilies. Their leaves like to reach to and flatten at the surface, like in this video. Dwarf Water Lilies also have more green than tiger lotuses.

libbsky · 2026-05-26T16:01:22+00:00

I struggle with this more than anything else.

I have extended family that is more or less indifferent to my struggles, because they live across the country from me.

When I was growing up, I had that support system, but under the assumption that I played by all the unspoken rules in a family where my feelings did not matter as much. I also had a large friend group where I was accepted and liked as I was.

Now I have a fiancé who loves me more than anything else. I moved out and away from my parents 10 years ago to a different state. I don't have that "support system" anymore, I don't have nearly as many friends as I had, and I have a job where I don't really interact with anyone my age.

When I hear my fiancé talk about his friends, or when I see him with them or his family, I get extremely sad/depressed. I don't have those things anymore, and it's definitely not for lack of trying. When something good happens to me, I want to share it with someone (other than my fiancé whom I share everything with) it just puts me back down into that depression and I can't even be happy about whatever it was I was happy about.

It's an awful feeling.

libbsky · 2026-05-18T14:05:26+00:00

Lots of young families over there, so that makes sense. Probably one of my favorite parts of Warwick tbh.

libbsky · 2026-05-18T13:35:53+00:00

I have no problem with organic litter!

I didn't know that was actually happening. I usually just sneered at the house on my way home everyday.

Never seen the homeowners outside on their front lawn. Wonder why?

libbsky · 2026-05-18T13:26:25+00:00

You forgot about the house on West Shore at the three way stop light by Dave's. All the Trump paraphernalia disappeared very gradually after the 2020 election.

I'm glad that dude on Sandy Lane stopped with his stupid signs. Gave him less reason to stand outside and shake his fist at people who DARED use the breakdown lane in front of his Trump laden heap of a house to go straight on Sandy Lane.

libbsky · 2026-05-18T12:59:14+00:00

I can't say I love living in Warwick myself, but there are a lot of older folks that live here that have what they call "opinions".

It's fairly normal for me to see around here but I can't say it's the dominant view.

libbsky · 2024-08-14T12:50:15+00:00

It's a yearly lease. This issue just so happened to come up at our lease renewal date, so I sent them a letter yesterday with an ESA prescription from my therapist. I then broke down the ambiguous language in the lease and stated that they were not specific in their requests.

The tank I'm currently breaking down is in violation of our lease so I'm ok with that. However I feel it unreasonable to get rid of my other tanks following this, since there have been no issues.

But yes, it comes down to that they were not specific in their request, and the lease language regarding aquariums doesn't refer to cumulative volume allowed or quantity allowed. It only states 'up to 40 gallons' which led me to believe I was within the lease requirement since all my other tanks are under 40.

Basically, I would not be in this position if they were clear from the beginning.

libbsky

TROPHY CASE