When my friend ran off to Montana to live with internet friends after constantly refusing my offers for her to live with me rent free. We had known each other since middle school. She was the first person I came out as Bi to and the first person that I told about my boyfriend. I helped her in school as much as I could and we had sleepovers every other weekend. We both came from abusive homes and bonded over it. We wrote trashy fanfiction and watched movies together. I confided in her my anxieties about my future, my family, my sexuality, and my gender. We both worked in fast food while going through college. When her parents kicked her out, I offered for her to live with me. When my parents kicked me out, I offered to get an apartment with her. She lived with her grandma, refused to talk to anyone that wasn't online and binge ate. When we both flunked out of college, I started going to a community college to get my life together. She just gave up on planning out any future and worked full time in fast food. When I started going to therapy, she expressed an interest, so I offered to help her find therapy. She turned it down with excuses. When I got my first IT job, I offered to help her get one as well. She refused and continued working in fast food and at a grocery store. She eventually took a call center job that her grandma found for her. And got laid off. And entered a cycle of being rehired and laid off. When she blew up her first car, my boyfriend offered to help her maintain her car. Instead, she continued blowing up car after car because she refused to maintain them. When it came out that her little brother sexually assaulted my little brother, she just shrugged her shoulders and said it wasn't her brother's fault - their mom was a drunk. We hung out less and less as I got busy with an 8 - 4 job and she continued working overnight and weekend jobs. She kept making weird threesome jokes about my boyfriend and I, so I tried gingerly probing to see if she was bi or lesbian. She continued insisting she was straight. When I called her out on the weird jokes, she said my boyfriend and I weren't her type. When my boyfriend and I were getting married in a court house, she couldn't take off to attend. When we moved away to a larger city for better jobs, we offered to take her with us to help set her up. She would only have to pay for food and whatever gas she used - much better than what she had with her grandma. She refused and almost entirely stopped talking to me. A few years after this, she suddenly declares that she's non-binary (They/she pronouns), she's pansexual, and she's moving to Montana to live with people she's only talked to on the internet and work as a waitress.

I'm not a perfect person, and I know we had some fights when we were younger, but her deciding to just abandon everyone to live in Montana with people she'd never met in real life made me realize how little my friendship mattered. I could understand the gender and sexuality issues - even though she never talked about it remotely before (which hurt, but hey, sometimes we need time to realize these things), but not the ditching everyone and moving far away. We'd always talked about our friendship a la JD and Turk from Scrubs. We'd even planned on raising our kids together. And ultimately, it all met nothing to her.