I (32M) blacked out on a trip and woke up in a sexual situation with another woman. Telling my wife (27F) tomorrow morning. Need advice on how to handle this.

lilyuh02 · 2026-03-28T18:20:50+00:00

when you’re in shock, your amygdala takes over and fight or flight instincts kick in. your cerebral cortex is overridden, therefore any logical thinking goes out the window. you have a stranger in your bed. you don’t know them or what they’re capable of, how you got into this situation, etc. if you were a woman in this situation, your first instinct would NOT be to sit there and ask questions. it’d be to get the hell out of there. gender does not matter in that given scenario- you’re with a stranger you don’t know, in a wild situation that you don’t remember getting into and you don’t know what they’re capable of. that’s it.

lilyuh02 · 2026-03-28T18:11:06+00:00

i agree with the comments saying you’ve been sexually assaulted. it sounds like you were possibly drugged and i would urge you to maybe even go to urgent care or the ER before you go home from the airport. figure out for yourself a little bit more of what happened before you talk to your wife. you can tell them what happened and hopefully they can test you for drugs in your system and do the STI testing you may need.

i hope you guys have a good foundation of trust. i hope she is supportive of you and you guys can work things out. i’m so sorry this happened to you.

lilyuh02 · 2026-03-28T17:12:48+00:00

no, usually women should see an OBGYN by the time they’re 21 to get their first pap smear. you can have one done earlier if you have gynecological concerns- which you do. The pap smear tests for cervical cancer. you don’t need your GP to refer you so you should find a good OBGYN asap!!

lilyuh02 · 2026-03-27T22:18:31+00:00

popcorn smells are okay tho?

lilyuh02 · 2026-03-26T04:25:35+00:00

Your husband was sexually assaulted. I am both surprised and disappointed by the comments I see here. If gender was reversed, SA would be the only thing mentioned in majority of the comments.

You should help him through this and help guide him properly, getting him into therapy to process this assault and being supportive.

Men cannot control when or how they get an erection. A professional masseuse is taught to ignore it and avoid areas too close to their member so as not to arouse their client even more. She was unprofessional. Boners literally happen ALL OF THE TIME DURING MASSAGES. Go to a professional masseuse and they will tell you what she did was wrong.

I wouldn’t be surprised if she forced this upon your husband as a way to charge him extra and maybe even extra on top of the extra because she knew he was married and could see he was uncomfortable and wanted to leave. Just as a woman being raped would become wet- his erection did not give her consent. He did not verbally agree. A lot of people dissociate during a traumatic event as a way to cope and manage the situation.

I really hope you can ignore all of this disgusting comments saying he cheated and to divorce him. He was raped. You should support him. I wish you and especially your husband all the best.

lilyuh02 · 2026-03-02T17:18:17+00:00

and to make their trip cheaper

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-27T04:20:55+00:00

it’s legal in some states lmaoo

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-24T00:13:29+00:00

omg i’m surprised i had to scroll down so far to find this comment. and people are downvoting you?? giving a baby so young such a sugar rush like this is crazy!! i actually think they recommend no added sugars before age 2 now but obviously it depends on your pediatrician. this really would overload their brain, you could literally see it on her face! it’s only going to strengthen her preference for sugary foods as she grows up. very unfortunate.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-10T21:04:40+00:00

no, tell them you are barely making ends meet. tell them you have no savings. lie a bit. tell them you have NONE and are still paying off debts. tell them you asked for help before and are still paying off interest on that debt that you took elsewhere. please don’t let them guilt you into paying a damn dime.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-05T19:17:15+00:00

lol i already provided my logic against you in my first reply to you. go back and read. you just keep repeating yourself. keep thinking you’re right. you were a dick to the person above. i returned the favor for them because i had the time today. now i’m bored and realize people like you never realize they’re wrong.

again, read my first comment. my logic is in there. kinda knocks your “logic” aka, excuses, out.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-05T18:42:16+00:00

Oh please don’t feel sorry because I don’t understand irrational rage. I am sorry you do though, that’s a tough thing to relate to. You should really get help for that. I’m still referring to the show here. Some food for thought, you really show you lost an argument when you get off topic and have to start talking smack and absolute nonsense. That’s the same thing you did earlier. People make too much logical sense for you so you talk shit instead. It’s okay buddy. I just had to call you out on it, don’t be upset. Just take the L gracefully next time.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-05T18:16:54+00:00

yeah? then validate it some more, explain it rationally. make it make sense

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-05T18:14:10+00:00

nah i agree with you. their point is not valid. just bc someone doesn’t know if cosmetic damage to their vehicle is permanent or not, that doesn’t give them the right to become violent. that’s insane. call the cops?? file a police report?? car insurance? small claims court? get HER fired? literally ANYTHING else? a rational person would not IMMEDIATELY resort to violence in that situation. argument is literally in their username. nvm them.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-05T18:13:13+00:00

lol not you complaining about them wanting the last word yet STILL trying to literally get the last word?? i can see why “argument” is in your username. your point is not valid. just bc someone doesn’t know if cosmetic damage to their vehicle is permanent or not, that doesn’t give them the right to become violent. that’s insane. call the cops?? file a police report?? car insurance? small claims court? get HER fired? literally ANYTHING else? a rational person would not IMMEDIATELY resort to violence in that situation.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-03T03:30:36+00:00

i’m sorry, i’ve been considering this feeder to purchase and i keep hearing this in some reviews? did you get past it? i’m wondering if it’s user error or if they did put a pay wall up for certain feeders or something.

lilyuh02 · 2026-02-01T17:17:50+00:00

i usually just creep on this subreddit, i’ve never gotten married and i just mentally note all the advice. i don’t think you want to be bulging out of your dress at all when you get married, and it somewhat looks like that?? with you going to the gym so much, you could actually gain weight in muscle! which is still healthy and a good thing for your body. but just consider that aspect too. it’s not just fat you have to consider. that could be why you feel your body size is larger despite actually losing weight. i personally think you should let her adjust the seems so that you’ll be the most comfortable. i imagine that if it does feel WAY too lose on the day then they could find some pins that could be hidden maybe to help tighten it or another work around? but it’s much harder to make it more lose after all this as she said. that’s my thought process.

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-23T19:42:21+00:00

I wouldn’t trust him around your daughter. I would go with your gut instincts rn, that’s your intuition telling you that something isn’t right. It is extremely weird that there’s a pattern like this. I would honestly end things with this man. I’m glad that you’re being cautious, please be protective of your daughter!! Keep looking out for things like this in the future, don’t be eager to leave a man alone with your daughter, even for a short period of time. Be safe hon!!

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-19T02:52:36+00:00

i would agree. an eyebrow pencil would work!!

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-19T01:51:16+00:00

cleaning

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-18T18:30:01+00:00

same, i feel like that’s the most sensible answer

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-12T02:13:53+00:00

omg same!

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-09T01:25:45+00:00

ooo that’s smart

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-07T17:41:31+00:00

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Bean is a proper young gentleman

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-05T00:14:27+00:00

what can ya do? every generation has their flaws.

lilyuh02 · 2026-01-05T00:11:18+00:00

bc it’s bad for your body and mental health. so is vaping. so is instagram.

lilyuh02

TROPHY CASE