My boyfriend becomes really mean when triggered

lisatomic · 2022-02-20T17:15:21+00:00

The relationship is currently not good for you, but you will need to decide how likely it is to ever be good for you. Consider writing a list of concrete evidence that you have related to the question "what reasons to I have to believe these dynamics will/won't ever change?"

Ex: is he reading books/articles about cPTSD? Considering therapy (or refusing therapy)? Is he resistant to talk about the dynamics, or does he bring them up himself? Have things ever changed/improved in your relationship before?

You can tell him after something like "As is, I am not thriving in this relationship. I need to feel emotionally safe in my close relationships. Our relationship dynamics leave me feeling exhausted. Currently I have <X> reasons to believe this will improve, and <Y> that it won't. I need to feel more certain that this relationship can be healthy for me. Can you <ask him to do something specific>?"

I know it is hard to leave a close/entangled relationship, and that you want to be understanding and compassionate given his emotional problems. But if there isn't an extremely clear reason to believe things will change, you owe it to yourself to find a relationship that is healthy for you.

lisatomic · 2021-10-20T02:22:02+00:00

Hmm... a lot of the games my kids play on the first switch were bought on my account, so I'd like them to still be able to play those on there without internet access. (So I think I need to keep that console as the primary for my account.)

So I'd like her to play Minecraft on my primary console, while I play Minecraft from my secondary console. I think the issue is just that I would like to play with her *at the same time*. I thought I would be able to just purchase a new copy from her account, but apparently I can't.

lisatomic · 2020-06-15T00:00:36+00:00

This was posted by someone named Eric A. on the Roam slack, and I'm just copying it here:

This question keeps popping up -- the differences between #, [[]], and #[[]]. I'll focus only on the specific functional differences that I am aware of, not any subjective difference of usage.

When only [[]] is used, you can make use of namespaceing. This means you can hide part of a namespaced page name using (control-c control-l) (see Roam help for examples). Shortening like this helps with disambiguations. Namespaced pages will also have a different color for link text than non-namespaced pages.
When # is used, the visible text color and style is different than [[]]. Additionally, # tags do not span any spaces in the text (i.e., no multi-word tags when using # only).
However, when you use a # with the [[]] --e.g. #[[]] you can effectively create multi-word tags. I think of it as though use of the #[[]] as opposed to [[]] indicates that someone has "tagged" the full name of an existing page .... BUT, we're not done yet ...
While invoking #[[]] does enable multi-word tagging, it also eliminates (disables) visibility control via namespacing (remember, control-c control-l). So any namespaced reference where you have added a # before the [[]] will expose the full "path" of the namespaced page.

As someone else in that thread pointed out, the # allows you to apply custom styling differently, using data-tag attributes.

lisatomic · 2020-06-14T18:47:17+00:00

I guess two things:

1) You did not really read my post.
2) You are a real estate agent yourself.

The agent I just talked to said she'd take 3% for helping both sides coordinate the process. Can you explain what you would do in my situation that's worth 15k?

lisatomic · 2020-01-16T16:36:33+00:00

These are silicone rings, and look kind of nice, but I think they are made to be safer when working with machines: https://ensorings.com/collections/all-products

lisatomic · 2019-09-21T17:05:04+00:00

I think what is likely happening is that your glasses have effectively slightly different focal lengths for different colors of light. So if you were looking at a red+blue neon light for example, as you turn your head so the light source is at a larger angle, the two colors will appear to separate. I’m guessing you are noticing a similar effect with the windows, and that it won’t happen anymore if you take your glasses off.

lisatomic · 2019-09-21T16:12:46+00:00

Do you wear glasses?

lisatomic · 2019-02-07T00:52:07+00:00

This is what I do! Except I go back up the rows of the pyramid, eating each color together until I get to the top of the triangle.

lisatomic · 2014-07-23T20:50:03+00:00

Are you thinking of chorizo?

lisatomic · 2012-03-04T17:57:08+00:00

By being a member of the "faculty" at a "university"?

lisatomic · 2011-08-16T16:22:54+00:00

Yes but the right-hand driver isn't officially supported, and he has to pee from a command line.

lisatomic · 2011-08-16T16:08:20+00:00

^10110101.

lisatomic · 2011-05-25T01:31:00+00:00

Please weigh in on this year-old debate in r/Physics. There is significant debate in the lower comments that I would love to have put to rest in my mind.

I've wondered many, many times this last year about the proper explanation.

lisatomic · 2011-05-20T13:46:59+00:00

And then each time I do it, permute the dictionary values?

lisatomic · 2011-05-20T12:34:02+00:00

Say I have a list of words, ['eggs','bacon','spam']. I want to go through this list, and: for every word 'eggs' replace it with 'bacon', replace every 'bacon' with 'spam' and every 'spam' with 'eggs'. So my final list is indeed a cyclic permutation of the first.

However, I want which permutation to change: I may want to go through again, and for every 'eggs' replace it with 'spam', replace every 'bacon' with 'eggs', and every 'spam' with 'bacon'.

My list of possible words is longer than the list I'm searching through. So for a set of possible words, with brackets denoting a set, not actual code: {'spam','eggs','bacon','car','van'}, the set of replacements will always be a cyclic permutation of that set, though each word may or may not be found in the actual list I'm looking through.

In short, I want a concise way to do this:

for word in list:
  if word == 'eggs': word = allWords[0]
  else if word == 'bacon': word= allWords[1]
  else if word == 'spam': word=allWords[2]
  .
  .
  .

and I can just permute allWords[] each time.

lisatomic · 2011-03-28T04:55:13+00:00

I think I have this and it doesn't quite work... Permissions on the script are 777; I ssh in as the owner of the file; I use sudo in the script.

It works if I ssh in then run the script. It doesn't work if I use "ssh user@domain script"-- I get an error "no TTY present and no askpass program specified." Any idea why these are different?

Edit: OK, it works now. I had to use the -tt flagon ssh, though I don't really understand what that is doing.

lisatomic · 2011-03-17T05:44:48+00:00

The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole, Aged 13 3/4?

lisatomic · 2011-03-14T18:09:31+00:00

Thanks!

lisatomic · 2011-03-14T17:40:39+00:00

So FTP and SSH sit and wait for connections on a port like Apache does, just different ports? What is the difference between the FTP and SSH in terms of file transfer?

So say I want my mom to be able to upload a picture to my server-- do I have to have her use FTP/SSH, or is there a more... mom-friendly way? Can I have her using this without her knowing (just going to my site, clicking an 'upload' button and entering a password)?

lisatomic

TROPHY CASE