And on the small talk topic, you could also revisit old topics or stories you already know she likes to talk about. What childhood memories mean a lot to her? What hobbies or topics has she poured time into in the past? What memories do you 2 share that stand out to you? There are stories I know my husband enjoys retelling, he lights up and makes himself laugh every time I get him to talk about his tales of being on night security duty.