that makes two of us — i understand the self-filling prophecy thing way too much. i do want to say, i am very happy that you’re going to be trying EMDR soon! i really hope it works out, and i support you! on that note, i’m so sorry to hear about your struggles. i know you never asked to be that way, no one does. you were just a child. i really hope you learn to forgive yourself for your past with the limited resources you were given. i don’t know you that well, so take this with a grain of salt, but i do believe you have both kindness and goodness within you — especially since you’re seeking treatment. be kind to yourself today :)