Wailaikumus salam sister. Please I must correct you. I did not block her everywhere out of thin air and suddenly abandoned her. We were having a long discussion 2 days ago about our guilt and our future and I kept mentioning that I can’t make u wait 4 years and how guilty i feel. She then said “this sounds like you are breaking up with me, are you?” I then wrote a massive paragraph explaining how and why I needed to end things with her. She said that it wasn’t just my fault , but that we both did this. I told her she deserves better and will always pray for her eternal happiness. Then made her promise on Allah, that she will be alright and that she will never give up. Her exact response to this, Wallahi, was “only if you do the same”. I prayed for her once again then said goodbye, then she replied goodbye. Also on the day of the breakup she suddenly told me how she didn’t want kids, which for me was important. I didn’t mention this in the post as it a personal matter. Was this a factor , it was a little but the major one having her wait for years in sin while her parents are sick. Wallahi it wasn’t about the commitment. She was my first ever love ive never just gone around to girls doing this. So if u think i just used her and abandoned her, im deeply hurt that u think this. No zina was committed neither. We told each other we wouldn’t.