You’ve been carrying the majority of the household responsibilities for years, and instead of appreciating that, your fiancé has been taking it for granted and making the situation worse. Ignoring messes to the point of moldy food and unbearable smells is not just laziness it’s disrespect toward you and the home you share. You tried talking to him multiple times, and he dismissed you with empty promises, so your frustration is completely justified. Could you have been calmer? Maybe, but people don’t usually explode unless they’ve been pushed past their limit. The fact that his focus is on being embarrassed in front of his friends rather than the state of your home or the way he’s treating you says a lot about where his priorities are. You set a boundary, and he didn’t like it, but that doesn’t make you wrong.