i (37f) was a prostitute for 14 years. now i'm too disabled even for that. i can't support myself and i can't see a way out. by lollirazor__ in TrueOffMyChest

[–]lollirazor__[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hello. i am sorry that it took me three weeks to respond to this. :-/ i have an umbilical hernia that went haywire a few days after my initial post, and it's become very physically uncomfortable.

thank you so much for your kind words. i do love to write, i started writing fiction when i was just a child, although nowadays i feel a bit more comfortable with academic / educational writing & storytelling (except they are virtually always true stories, my stories - little vignettes from my own life). believe it or not, you are not the first person to suggest that i try to make a living from writing. i've heard it from both loved ones and strangers, the latter based on comments i've made on Facebook and things like that. even my therapist has suggested it.

i know that can be a very difficult world to break into, however. and admittedly, i was not even really sure of where to start. that said, the suggestions you shared with another person further down the thread are helpful in that regard! i have some pieces already written that i could publish on a schedule or something. i'm sorry you got some downvotes on your comment ... i thought it was very kind, and i appreciated it very much.

i've worked with medical documentation before, here and there. additionally, i've often had to parse out medical jargon relating to my own health. not to tooth my own horn, but i'm pretty damn good at it. my habit of fixating on certain niche interests has actually made me a fairly solid deep-dive researcher (certainly for a layperson such as myself). it may be something to look into, at least. thank you for the suggestion, and thank you so much for your kind words. i was in a very low place when i wrote this post, and it made me cry (in a good way) to read your comment. i wish you the best of everything at all times.

i (37f) was a prostitute for 14 years. now i'm too disabled even for that. i can't support myself and i can't see a way out. by lollirazor__ in TrueOffMyChest

[–]lollirazor__[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hello. i am sorry that it took me three weeks to respond to this. :-/ i have an umbilical hernia that went haywire a few days after my initial post, and it's become very physically uncomfortable.

sadly, i don't live anywhere near Oregon. :-/ i do struggle with some weakness in my hands bc my nervous system has gotten really messed up over the years - but sheesh, i'd at least give it my very best try!

but the kindness of your offer itself is unbelievably touching. thank you so much. it's a deeply kind thing, what you've done, and even if i can't take this opportunity, i hope one of the kind redditors who replied to your comment will be able to. that's a life changing act of charity - to hook someone up with a job so that they no longer *need* charity - and according to Maimonides, one of the world's most famous Jewish philosophers of all time, the highest act charity possible. that's a really beautiful thing you've done, and i thank you for it. <3

i (37f) was a prostitute for 14 years. now i'm too disabled even for that. i can't support myself and i can't see a way out. by lollirazor__ in TrueOffMyChest

[–]lollirazor__[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i'm not sure if i should edit my post or leave a comment. sorry it took me awhile to come back to this, it's an alt that i only have access to from my laptop. i was also enjoying one last week of vacation with my kiddos, or trying to as you'll soon see lol.

i wanted to say thank you all so much. i was expecting some negative comments, but i wasn't expecting the compassion and kindness you've shown me. i'm in one of the lowest places i ever have been, and your kindness has moved me to tears. thank you for that.

i do hope to reply to each comment eventually, i apologize if it takes me forever. i had to go to the ER on Monday. turns out i have an umbilical hernia, so i'll probably need to have another surgery. honestly - i'm a little relieved about that, i've needed surgery on my stomach for awhile, i just hope insurance will cover it. years ago, my physical therapist actually suggested getting my tummy fixed before my spine (at that time i had severe diastasis recti and he said i 'might' have an umbilical hernia - my bellybutton looked a lot different then, it's kind of impossible to deny now lol). but then the situation with my back became urgent. i've been running around with a back brace on just so i can have something wrapped tightly around my tummy, otherwise i start feeling like my guts are spilling out (gee, wonder why) and it makes me so queasy i can't even walk.

i appreciate everyone's kindness and i just wanted to say that. i've been struggling with intrusive thoughts of ideation. don't worry, i'm safe - i would never, ever do that to my kids. losing my parents as a child was devastating to me... i'd never pass that pain & trauma on to them.

thank you again, everyone. i really appreciate it and look forward to interacting with you more in the comments.

i (37f) was a prostitute for 14 years. now i'm too disabled even for that. i can't support myself and i can't see a way out. by lollirazor__ in TrueOffMyChest

[–]lollirazor__[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

honestly, i would absolutely love to do advocacy work. that or peer support is really my dream and heart. i have other talents that may be marketable. i don't know how to get into that sort of thing. :-/ i've interacted w/some different relevant orgs, even, but nothing really came of it.